http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/...nt-to-catch-a-ladys-eye-dont-smile-study-says In this issue British scholars found out that not smiling person is more attractive to opposite sex than smiling. My intake on it is that I was told to smile when approaching a new person, but after I approach to stop smiling, at least openly (playful smile). This has two implications to be controlled - bad boy look can be sold with the confident none smiling face, but there is pitfall of coming across as asocial or a wimp... your intake on this? Tiger
The study is completely bogus. Just look at the pictures they used of "male pride" versus "men smiling" in the study... Smiling Guys Notice how they look like cheesy head-shots from Match.com or a dating site. Not-smiling guys. Notice the Pics of male models and male athletes in successful positions and winning competitions... As far as I'm concerned, the method of the experiment is completely WHACK. Some researcher trying to get media publicity by producing a bizarre result. And it worked, it's all over the news. In fact, I hope millions of guys take this advice to heart and save the rest for us. Also, there's a total difference where you're coming from with the smile. If you're really nervous desperate for the girl to like you, your big smile will convey all the wrong things - a neediness of "please, please accept me!" But if you smile at the girl like, "I am the sexiest man on the planet" and you're in your own space of coolness and fun, that smile will be infectious to the girl. And if you're feeling all that, and you're NOT smiling, the approach will still work because of what's coming through underneath. So in fact, if you're really, really nervous it CAN often be better NOT to smile so that you appear more relaxed and chill.
Tiger; I am surprised you would address this and fall for the media hype. I am starting to believe what Adam Gilad wrote, recently, about Body Language, though. People say that 80% of who we are is based on Body Language, but, what we say has 20% of who we are. Adam disagrees with these percentages. After reading his article, I remember the FUNNY things I say to women, when I meet them and talk to them. But, this ability took many years of talking and being around women...I just LOVE being around women! So, I would say that what we say, has a big part in who we are...maybe, 40%? TM
I've found what works for me is to match the energy level in context. If it's a quiet lone girl at the bookstore, you don't really want to explode her with a huge smile. Just a soft closed smile works well. If it's a big set of 5 girls at a club all smiling and talking, saying hello with a big open smile to match the energy level and not bring it down works pretty well. I smile a lot though, because girls tell me often I've got a great smile... so I use it as much as I can...
