Rust removal needed!

I can't believe that last time I was actively participating on this forum was in 2007. Time flies, shit.

Looong story short, I was on the top of my game until the end of 2008. Within the past three years, I've rusted. Real bad. It's as if the person from 08 never existing.

I'm not going to get too much into the details as to why things went downhill but here’s a snapshot: got married, had a child, became domesticated.

I’ve changed a lot. I’m uncomfortable in social settings. My confidence had been shot down. I have difficulty holding conversations with people. I’ve gained weight. I don’t eat right.

What matters right now is that I'm ready to re learn and train myself back into "shape."

I went out (night club) this past weekend (first time in a while) and had an encounter with a solid 8 which gave me a rude awakening. I hope I can turn things around.

Facts:

I must admit that I was a bit tipsy and she was drinking too - but didn't seem any tipsier than I.

Even though my talking game has gone to sh!t, I didn't lose much of my body languange (NVSC).

Here's the story:

I was standing on the edge of the dance floor with the other hawks. Shouldn't have been there but I was. I was truly enjoying the music. A favorite house DJ of mine was spinning and rocking the club but I was into the music much more than I was into my social surroundings.

While "having a good time” listening to music a 5' 5" Indian beauty stood right in front of me and started dancing. While dancing, she pulled out her iPhone and started taking a video of the scene. Right at that moment it hit me. If I was the old me, I would've taken the camera from her and started recording her, doing a photo shoot, etc.... I froze - didn't do a thing besides "vibe out" to the music.

Being the rusty f*ck that I am, I tell my buddy standing next to me to speak with her. So he does and she immediately loses interest. A few seconds later she turns around to me and says, "what's up with your friend?"

Just like when I had a moment while she was recording with her iPhone, I had another. My inner game machine automatically kicked in after years of being dormant and collecting rust. It was rough but nevertheless started working.

I answered her question by saying, "What didn't you like about what he had to say? Hey, tell me all the bad pick-up lines you got tonight. I used to be a dating coach and I like hearing these things....." I mean that's the gist of it. It's not word for word.

Good response? I don't know. What I do know is that it opened up a conversation. My old instincts kicked in and I was in control of the situation..... My body language was right. We were laughing. She was talking more than I. She was leaning into me. I initiated KINO - slowly escalated with minimal resistance. We danced. I was all over her. She was all over me.

So, what's the problem? Where did it go wrong? I have no idea. All I know is that I messed up.

At one point during the night, we got split up. She went to the restroom. I walked away after 10 minutes (thinking she wasn't coming back and used the bathroom excuse on me). About 20 minutes later, she finds me near the bar. We continued to talk a bit and then I lead her back onto the dance floor - we dance for a bit. Then we went to another part of the club and talked for sometime about house music and realized we both like the same DJs, etc. I felt as if we were really connecting.

During the night she was.... leaning into me smiling looking at my mouth. Hugging me. I remember kissing her on the cheek. My hands around her waist, touching her lower back, grabbing her hips and ass while dancing, etc. I mean everything seemed right.

I felt I was on point with my body language. I was totally off and completely killed it when it came to reading hers. I mean who doesn’t kiss a girl that’s leaning into you while smiling and looking at your teeth? Hello.

The night came to an end after she got us a round of drinks (I drank water) and we started talking about fu*cking recent news, economics, straight garbage boring talk. I steered the convo into the wrong direction. It became an AFC conversation. At one point she mentioned another club (after hours) and it being open until 10:00am. I totally belittled her comment by making fun of the type of people at the club at that time. I then said that I would call it a night and go out again Thursday night. Oh, really?!?!? Good one huh? The entire interaction when totally dry when I got her into the VIP area by the DJ booth so that she can go and request a song. As she was walking into VIP she told me to wait for her. I waited 10 minutes. Left and came back in 10 minutes. Waited another 5 - she was nowhere to be seen. I left and went home.

The point I’m trying to make is that my talking game is DEAD.

I really don’t know why I came here. I don’t have a specific goal in mind. I guess it’s good to have somewhere to talk about my experience and let it all out.

I have to get back to my old self. When I was on point with my game, every other aspect of my life was on point. The stuff that I learned from SS changed my life back then. I need for that to happen again. I need a revival but more importantly I need to be able to keep it.

If anyone wants to comment on and constructively criticize my experience at the club and/or my current state please do so.

I just wrote all of this in one “breath”. I hope it all makes sense.

Sounds like you're being a little too hard on yourself.

I could be wrong but I think there's more good points to be taken from that experience than negative ones.

Perhaps one of the more veteran members will comment

Thanks for the input. Much appreciated. Time heals everything, right? The more I go out the better I'll feel. It's kind of like "learning" to ride a bicycle again I'm starting to het back into this and it feels good.

So check it.

Later during the day, when I first posted, a good friend of mine called me to say hi. I wound up explaining to her what happened the night before and said something like "I just wish I had gotten a number from her.. I know that I would totally reel her back in if I could speak with her." My friend, being the helpful little detective she is, asked for her name and some info about her. (BTW, over the years, I found out that some women are very good/sneaky at finding out info about others) Anyway, the only info I had was her nationality, first name, city she said she was from and that she was going to attend the same event in her hometown a few weeks earlier but it got cancelled and decided to come out to the nyc event and visit some friends.

Today I get a call from my friend saying that she thinks she found her. She gives me her FB info, I take a look and I'm FLOORED. She actually found her. I was shocked at first because none of her personal information is listed and from what I understand if (for example) your city isn't listed you can't be searched/it's hard to find someone (?).... So she tells me how she did it. Sneaky bitch She found the cancelled event's page and went through the list of people who clicked attending. I mean it's pretty simple but I wouldn't have put the thought/effort into it.

So, here comes my questions. How do I approach her? Should I just explain what really happened and how I got to her? OR does anyone have any other ideas? I don't want to come off as a creep by reaching out to her via the internet.