Swing 4 the Fences ep.2: More Cockblocking

Spent the weekend in DC visiting friends who just got back from the Navy. Since I was in a new town, figured every set would be pushed for one-night stands. It has been 3 months since the last time I went out in DC, when I was relatively new to Game. My previous exploits in the Capital inculded storming into a VIP section, grabbing a lingere-clad Asian hottie by the hair, and telling her how hot she was. :woot:

Some pretty rad shit went down this time back in the ballpark; however, as the title foreshadows...the end result is more cockblocking:thumbdown: {this is gonna be longgggggg)

Friday Nite I am excited, and once again in MECHA STATE. There is no warming up, I'm either on and in the zone, or blah... I make small talk with a hottie on the train, and make a Dante's Peak (Pierce Brosnan) reference to some people while on a ridiculously steep escalator.

Get to the bar. It is not a club, but is really loud. Bouncer ID's me and is talking to an Ok girl. I heckle, asking if she is causing any trouble. Bouncer says she is looking for a guy, and suggests "she goes with me since you're a hot guy." I laugh and heckle him, introduce myself, telling him he seems like a cool guy and that I'm gonna have a great time in the city.

Friends order a shot of Jack. They knock it back and cringe/suffer. I keep a straight face, but inside I fear I may puke all over the bar. I'm a vodka guy...

It's loud and everyone is wallflowering. I see a group of girls in the corner standing at a table. I approach urgently with, "Hey! You girls need to help me...I'm out with friends in the Navy and they are trying to get me very drunk...I'm gonna chat with you, promise you won't take advantage of me "

They are all floored and laugh. Its a 4 set, 3G-1M. A short cutie who I did not notice on the way into the set is all over me. Her taller friend is competing a bit. I flirt and tease, introduce myself. The short hottie (SH) says she has seen me there before, 3 weeks ago, which is not possible. I accuse her of calling me a liar. We banter about this for a bit which results in me saying to the girls..."let me get this straight...let's assume for a second that you are right, let's say I have been here before. So, 3 weeks go by, and you are still fantasizing and thinking about me?!:thumbup:"

They are speechless and cracking up. I introduce myself to the other girl in the group and the guy. He looks like a young Van Morrison, and I tell him this. They love it, they are down for Van the Man. SH disapears to the bathroom. I move to the next group of girls.

3 Aussies. Open hottest with direct opener. Target introduces herself as "Lara Croft" and then acts really aloof. I turn to her friends, who give names and shake hands normally. Turn back to the hottie with, "See, your friends are capable of introducing themselves normally..c'mon, be a good girl "

Set is a bit drab, they seem either intimidated or not interested.

Downstairs. Here is where shit gets epic. See a super hot girl dancing against the wall with a group of friends (2 girls, 2 huge black guys LOL) I go up and go direct on her ass. Then I stand next to her and playfully mock her dancing infront of her friends. They think it is funny. I hold out my hand for the girl. She shakes her head 'no.' I command her to take my hand. She obeys and I spin her, really fast, and pull her into my arms.

I turn to the friends figuring I would need to win them, but the girl has her camera out and is snapping pictures of me and the babe. I tease and ask, "What are you trying to do, cement me on Facebook as random DC bar guy?!" Laughter, they ask me my name. Talk to black dudes, they are trashed and are cool with me.

Get into a talk with target. She is cool as shit and BEAUTIFUL. Epitome of girl next door. She was just wearing jeans and an unflattering top. She had flawless peach skin, bright green eyes, dirty blonde hair pulled back, a white smile and huge tits. I am kinoing the shit out of her, hand always on arm or something.

We get past the banter and I say, "Yeah its cool to be out in the city. Most of my hobbies and interests are so introverted, its nice to meet cool people out and about." On the word 'introvert' she literally looks swept off her feet. She tells me she was a Literature major. We bond over writing. Turns out we both read David Sedaris. I tell her, "I write memoirs for fun, mischeivious. It's like a less apologetic, non-gay D. Sedaris!" She giggles and is like, "non gay Sedaris that is soo funny." Me: "Lucky you "

Pull her in, grope, then push her back and move her to the other side of me. My friend comes in and awkwardly crashes the set. Standing sort of behind me talking about how lame the place is and how they are leaving. Like a man, I introduce him and say I'm fine here. He goes out for a smoke.

Recovery work. Talk about music. The girl says she loves the Bee Gees! I am all for it, and probably overreact when I hear a girl who has the same interests as me. I freak out tell her how awesome and cool she is for that, but then test her by asking if she can name a song other than "Stayin' Alive." She says she plays drums and in highschool bought a Japanese Koto and played it. I consider asking her to marry me.

"Wow, you little brat I bet you were the girl in highschool sitting in the back of the class...drumming like Keith Moon on your desk while the teachers talking! You bad girl!"

She cracks up and agrees.
Friend comes back bitching about going somewhere else.:wtf: I'm thinking about what I can do. There is no place to isolate and I have been running high-octane kino for a solid 10-15 mins. To make it seem scarce, I tell the girl our time together may be limited. Friends go out front again. Girl and I talk more and I keep strong eye contact over intentionally placed awkward pauses.

Eventually, she says, "Your friends are gonna be pissed, its been like 20 minutes."
"Wow, so quick to get rid of me, huh?! God, and here I am talking to a cute girl...what are you doing to me?!"

Here is an EPIC rapid fire exchange that followed:
"I have a boyfriend."
"OK."
"Yeah, so I figure I should say that."
"Do you feel better now? Should that deter me in anyway!?"
"...no...I guess not..."
(pull her in) "Good cause you turned out to be such a cutie "
"We should be friends..."
"No. I am only in town for one night."
"What's that supposed to mean?!"
"It doesn't have to mean a thing."
"Hehehehe I do like you "

By the end of it, I just wanted to start beating my dick because I sounded like the dude in the Dos Equis commercials, it was cool as shit. She kept talking, but I couldn't make out what she was saying over the deafening rage of my own awesomeness.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friend comes back AGAIN and absolutely kills a long eye contact. The seduction trance is literally ruined. I act unaffected. Girl says she is going to stop by the bar we are going to. We hug and I sniff her hair/neck. I think I mis-calibrated by doing it really aggresively as she was taken aback. If I did it more sensually it may have been better.

Leave. Friend finally realizes he cockblocked me and apologizes. Whatever, there are more fish in the tank.

Place is literally one door over and that pisses me off. I could have bounced the girl there. We go in and it is dead. My friend says 'Fuck this" and heads upstairs. I stay.

It's very dark and small. A disco ball is hanging from the ceiling with green lights scattering across the room. There are two fat black guys at the bar, with even fatter girls dancing on them. An old black guy is passed out on the Cheetah print couch that lines the wall. Of the 6 people there, I am the only white person.

I see a really hot black girl with 'white people hair." You know exactly what I am talking about. She is petite and has awesome, perky boobs. Muscular legs and toned arms.

This approach is fucking ridiculous because I am an idiot...Its a good thing I'm fast on my feet...

So I see the girl, smile and wave to her. I start walking towards her and reach out my arms. Its too late before I realize that I am walking towards a mirror, trip, and walk right into the wall. FAIL LOL. I laugh and turn to her, saying, "Wow...so I see this super hot girl I want to talk to across the room, and realize she's been right next to me the whole time! What are the chances? Where did those ninja skills come from?!"

Introduce myself and spin her. My elbow grazes the fat black chicks face behind me...opps... I tell her about how I am going to be Tommy the Green Power Ranger for Halloween, and that it is awesome. She tells me she is going to be Little Red Riding Hood. I playfully ask if she is going to sex up the outfit. She takes a step back, snaps her fingers in my face and says, "You know how I'm gonna do it! Sexy all the way!"

I laugh and snap my fingers in her face, then hug her. Friend comes down AGAIN. I think I should have went out alone at home...

Go upstairs and tell my friends to stop waiting for me. Its dark, and very loud. I HATE CLUB SCENES FUCKKKKKK

Regardless, I open two hot girls standing infront of an aqaurium near the bar. One was wearing a striped shirt. I say, "Wow OMG you look so cute in that, like a little pirate. And you have the hoop earings and fish from the open seas!" They laugh and we make pirate noises. Other girl makes fun of her friend, saying she looks like an albino bumble bee. I high five her for being an ass and having originality points. At this point, I am just trying to chill so I make small talk while kino'ing. The one loses interest and drags her friend from me. "We have to go..."

I grab the girl and stay put. "If you call this hard to get, you're gonna have your work cut out..."

Black girl comes upstairs! We chat and she was pretty into me from the get-go. I am basically just holding her while we make meaningless chatter. I restate my ONS frame. She says she has to go back downstairs but suggests I come down to get her number. I say "that doesn't sound too enticing, I need more..."
She asks me where I am from and then says, "Thats not too far, I can make it work."
The only thing that ran thru my head is that I have no idea where I am and no place to isolate. In retrospect I realize I had this in the bag. Bummer. I told her I would meet her downstairs in a bit. Sort of dropped the ball...

I have been there for less than 30 minutes and have already talked to all the hot girls. Go back to friends at the bar and get a drink. I laugh because I am the ONLY person smiling, all the guys are just scowling across the room.

I see two seemingly hot girls with glow lights dancing around on the other side of the bar. "Hey! Where did you get those that looks fucking awesome!" I realize that they are total butterfaces and with huge, rastafarian smelly boyfriends. Girl : "Who the fuck are you?" I repeat and she responds with the same bitchy shit. I think I am not going to get rejected by these ugly fucks. I ask her friend and she is just as rude, I comment on how awesome they are for being so friendly. They don't pick up on the sarcasm. The one girl says she is from "wherever." I decide that I am going to be mean because they are totally trashed, worthless cunts. "wow, Wherever? That sounds soo cool...now is that part of the continental United States?" You see where I am going with this...forced them to walk away by stating, "Well you can either be friendly and chat, or not, but you will literally need to walk away from me because I am going to keep talking." They take my rejection invitation and it is liberating. I raise my fist and proclaim that I am such a tease. First time a girl has ever been flat out rude.

Open another set of 5 girls dancing. I hold out my hand and force the most decent one to take it, basically by just standing there smiling until she acknowledges me. I was obviously just fucking with them and not trying to get some. They are all total bitches and act like they don't want to dance. I ask the fatter girls if they are more fun than their buddies, they obviously comply and qualify themselves. Gets a bit weird as I was just trying to have legit fun, and they thought I was trying to hook up with one of them....Who do they think I am?? C'mon, they're at the bottom of the barrel for a reason...

I don't feel like going back to the bar, and there is noone else I feel like talking to. I go to the bathroom. I check myself out in the mirror, wondering wtf is up with these dumbass girls...did I get ugly all the sudden?? Nope, I startle myself because I look pretty fucking good. Wow they are retarded. I have my hair down and am wearing a brown tweed blazer over a red T shirt with a Twinkie on it, my mom's jeans which are mangling my balls (laundry got mixed up...) and blue suede loafers. Suffice to say, I am at peak Game:lol:

Go downstairs, Black chic is gone. Thats what I get for hesitating. Go back up and two decent Latinas meekly open my friends. They basically stand and talk at arms length while the girls sort-of dance. I sit down and have a drink.

I am evil and decide I am going to cockblock the shit out of them. Yep. Made up my mind. I get up and put my arms around both girls, I turn my back on my group and block them out. I say, "Watch out for them, you know how these Navy dudes get...I've had dudes trying to grind on me and I have been fighting off girls all night " I run raw physical groping and dancing and spinning and teasing. I pull the hotter one into me and force her to ballroom walk with me. She is trashed and can barely hold my hand. I say, "wow, for how cute you're dressed I would have assumed you would be more graceful..." She keeps trying to qualify. I go back to her friend and scream ICE CREAM SANDWICH TIME!!!! And make them both grind on me. The one has a round ass and they are thick, curvy and like Middle Ages hot, which is a different kind of sexy.

In a desperate move, one of my friends buys BOTH GIRLS DRINKS. He jumps in and hands them the drinks. The girls immediately go to him and I laugh at their communal desperation. I pull one of them back and say, "Enjoy that, you'll never get a drink out of me And you better not abuse my friends." Her, "No, I'm not like that..." More teasing, more kino.

Then they start grabbing two of my friends awkwardly and laying around on them. Excuse me, but, you ARE like that. Instinctively, I decide I am over this place. I do one lap with my friend because two hot blondes walked in and I was gonna open them for him. Didn't see them so I left.

I had the biggest piece of pizza ever. It was like 2 feet long no lie. Three Mecha Hot girls came up to us and asked for directions. I laughed and watched my friend, who lives in DC, fail, look to the ground and let out a meek "ehh , ummm, no sry..."

As expected, the girls bailed on my friends. We leave and catch the train back.

They give me tons of shit for not drinking alot and not getting wasted and dancing. They say I am retarded for talking to girls about Led Zeppelin, Power Rangers, and Kangaroos. (I think thats pretty well rounded LOL) I give them shit for cockblocking and remind them that while they were busy buying drinks, I opened a record setting 40 girls!

Whats weird is that I think this weekend puts me at over 500 approaches. I am solid at getting my foot in the door, but I have a serious sticking point with timing pushes so I can escalate. I feel like since I have no approaching problems and no issues with anxiety in Night Game, I should be upgrading my solid opens to make-outs at least. How do you guage pushes? I think I come in a bit too strong some times:feedback:

Also, after all these girls, call me picky, but I mabye felt a connection with 5 out of the 500. That indescribeable spark that just happens on occasion. And 3 of that 5 I would say were gamed well, namely Audrey Hepburn lookalike and Gym Girl. Is it that hard to get a good connection, or am I just that fussy? If anything that gives me indifference in spades.

Ohh yeah, and for all you pussies out there....Turns out, after my last Field Narritive which involved pissing and shitting blood....Guess who has an Anal Laceration??!! (not that it is at all necessary for me to share that...)

*Me* Oh, and I swear I'm not gay

So yeah, I am literally putting my blood on the line. I DID THIS SHIT WHILE BLEEDING OUT OF MY FUCKING ASS!!!!!! FOR ANYONE THAT JUST READS THIS....GET OUT FROM BEHIND THE COMPUTER....HAVE NO FEAR....

GAME ON MY FRIENDS

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Just know that I am there with you, thru every bitch shield, 20 in 90, opinion opener. I am standing by you, blood staining my neon Polo briefs, cheering you on.

All for the love of the Game, Have a drink on me:thumbup: