This isn't mean to be an opinion piece or point of view. I'm just going to paraphrase a conversation I had with a girl recently about the different types of guys she sees in the world. We got on the topic of nsa friendships. She said she's at a point in her life right now where she keeps emotions completely out of dating, making it easy for her to have sex with a guy but not get attached. In her mind there's three types of guys she can date. Guys who want to use her, guys that she can use, and guys who shouldn't be used. The first two types of guys are typically two peas from the same pod. Usually an extremely hot guy who's full of himself, over confident, and a bit of a jerk. Basically the kind of guy she can use for sex but not feel bad walking away from when she gets bored. According to her I'm the third type, a guy who shouldn't be used. Apparently she can tell that I'm the kind of guy that is too good-hearted to have nsa sex with. I don't really know what this means, but it's been stuck in my head all day.
Hmm.. sounds like she's looking for a guy that will fuck her silly, dump her, and she's forced to chase him... she wants an emotional roller coaster ride of intense feelings. A provider guy or a nice guy will have sex with her, and start chasing her and doting on her because he's instantly attached to her. And that's not what she wants, at least in her mind. It may also be a congruence test (unconsciously done on her part). If she says that to you, and you don't contradict her and just accept it, it confirms to her that you're a nice guy provider. It was a test to see if you'd act congruently with what she was suggesting, that you're a nice guy. In other words, it was a subtle challenge, because she likes you. If you had told her, "Oh yeah???" And pulled her into you, groped her ass and made out with her, she would have gone along with it. In other words, she was telling you EXACTLY how to seduce her, because she LIKES you. She was giving you important information about what turns her on. But you sat through it, acting just like a nice guy, and so she discovered what kind of guy you were in relation to her. Her statement about you fulfilled it's purpose in seeking information about what kind of guy you were. Next time perhaps, just pull her in and makeout with her. Make her try to resist you. Start acting like the bad boy around her.
This exact situation used to happen to me all the time with girls I was "just friends" with at school. Jesse is correctomundo, Hammer meets nail per usual. She is trying to cement you into a role, BUT, if you take a different path, she is spelling out what she wants. Its all between the lines. Chick logic is retarded. But, when I would act up, grab the girls ass or be playful, it always got a good response. Memorables being.... "You're right, I am such a NICE GUY!" (grab her ass) or if she trys to pull the "I love you, nap with me" cuddle of celibacy, just jump ontop of her and start humping her. P.S. what girl keeps emotions out of anything?
This explanation shattered my old ways of thinking. Thanks I don't kiss and tell, but shortly after I posted this thread your theory was proven true.
