Hi everyone, Its been a long time since I've visited or posted here (About 7 months). I've missed all of you guys (AK81, Karea, AKM, SHS, Shark, AV8r, jay kay, the riddler, smashbug, DC, and everyone else whose names I've forgot but whose words I always remember). You guys are close friends who I've lost touch with. At one time, you were all part of my daily life and you may not know it, but you all have changed my life for the better. Without you guys, I probably wouldn't have met the woman of my dreams and had so many amazing experiences. I hope you all have been well and you've found success in all your endeavors. Things in my life have changed a lot in the last year. I've now been with my girlfriend for 15 months and we officially moved in a new place together about 4 months ago after living together unofficially (at my place) for about 6 months. It took some getting used to the first week, but after communicating with each other about things which bothered us we got over it really quickly. In my personal life, I have experienced a wide range of emotions in the last year. About a year ago, a couple weeks after meeting my girlfriend, my father unexpectedly passed away which was really hard on me. At about the same time, I was forced to sell my business because of a divorce. The money received from the sale of the business is still tied up in court as my ex-wife is fighting me for the money a year later so I have not seen a penny. I took over my fathers business after he passed away to help my mother handle a business she had no idea how to run. Eventhough I didn't enjoy the type of business my dad was in, my goal was to turn the business around, sell it, and then get out with some money for my mother and I. Unfortunately, the business is an industry which is seeing margins shrinking and with the poor economy we are in dire straits. I hate going to work everyday because in my honest opinion I see no future in this business and IMO its only a matter of time before the business falls apart. My mother doesn't see things my way so I continue to run it half heartedly. I'm also worried about how I will make a living for myself in the future. I've always been an entrepreneur and would be unhappy working for someone else. Right now since all my money is tied up in court its hard for me to begin something new because I don't have the liquid cash. In addition, the current job isn't paying too much and doesn't look promising at all so I stress out alot. Additionally, my divorce lawyer is costing me around $5K/month which is causing me to go into major debt. Its a horrible situation and one that stresses me out daily. All these stresses have caused me to become far less sociable than I was a year ago when I had so much confidence and so much game. At that time, I felt indestructable. I felt like I was a wizard with woman and people. I could work my magic anywhere anytime. Those feelings are long gone and I feel the old me (pre divorce) creeping back in. Self doubt, stress, concern about how other are viewing me, etc all are coming back. I'm nowhere near as social as I was a year ago. I don't feel like the fun guy my girlfriend fell in love with. I feel reserved again and a bit awkward. A complete 180 from before. After my divorce, I lost 30lbs and I've put back 20lbs which also does not make me happy. I've tried to get back into a regular routine, but I don't have the same discipline. My girlfriend and I used to have sex almost everyday and now we have sex about twice a week. We both love each other incredibly and get along so well. We have excellent communication with each other, but many times I'm lazy about having sex. It feels so planned now. Before, I would throw her against walls and start ravaging her and now at bedtime, we close the lights, get into bed, and have sex. Very boring. She hasn't gone down on me in a loooong time. I've gone back to looking at porn more often for a quick fix. I'm concerned about how things are progressing for me personally and how this might be affecting my moods and my relationship with my girlfriend. I'm concerned she will wake up one day and realize I'm not the fun guy she met over a year ago. I need help to get these negative thought out of my head and cheer up. I feel like my career and money problems are affecting so many things in my life. I don't feel good about waking up in the morning. I aspire to be how I once was about a year ago. Thanks all. I look forward to hearing from you all.