How To Remake Yourself – You Are Not Your Past

You are not your past.

And the past does not equal the future.

I don’t care if in the past you’ve had trouble approaching women. I don’t care if in the past, you were nervous around women.

If you want to meet hot women, making a new identity has to take place. Look, the past is over. It doesn’t exist anymore. The past is a hallucination, a movie inside your mind. Yes, the past can be a reference to help you make good decisions in the here and now, but the past doesn’t need to control you.

Today you can be a totally new person. Today you can be making a new identity. Today you can do things or act in new ways that aren’t normally you.

I mean, what’s holding you back from today saying, “The past is over. Today I’m going to be a new man. Today I’m going to be a new person. Today I’m going to be the kind of person who approaches and opens beautiful women successfully.”

Sure, your friends, your family, they have expectations about the kind of person you’re supposed to be, about certain ways you’re supposed to act. But you don’t exist simply to please them, to fit a confining role of what they’re comfortable with.

All through our lives we change, grow, mature, expand our possibilities of who we are. You can use your past as a guide to help you navigate through the world, but it’s not healthy to let it control you, or let others expectations control you. That’s living in a self-imposed prison.

So if you want to be able to approach women, you have to have this belief that you can grow, learn, and change, make a new identity, and that just because you acted one way yesterday, doesn’t mean you have to act that way today or tomorrow or next week or next year.

Today, tomorrow, next week, and next year, you can become a new person, a new person who has abundance in his life. And just because you failed yesterday or the 10 days before that, or the 100 days before that, what happened in the past does not equal what is going to happen today or in the future. All that matters is what you’re going to do right now.

13 thoughts on “How To Remake Yourself – You Are Not Your Past”

  1. OMG this is so true. I didn’t even finish reading all the above but I know what the deal is. I just got recently divorced. The past is the past – now leave it there!! I decided that after 20yrs of one way of thinking and routine, it was time for a new identity. I’m a very intuitive person and had payed close attention to what was going on around me over those years and specifically the women. The divorce (not my choice) cut me free from my past and a terrible world closed in. One night I got so pissed at the situation but realized and then smiled – I will take control OF EVERYTHING in my head, my heart and my life. I shed the past and created a newer and better identity in my mind. My A game was on! I can’t help but smile as I read things on this site. It’s just so true. That Deep Inner Self thing – spot on!!! With that all else just falls into place. I got there by proving to myself I was better off divorced, free make choices and more. The confidence set in, I smiled at every woman I met and tried off the wall but interesting and original one line ice breakers. If I could laugh at the moment I figured she could too and it worked! It was a simple haircut to start the process for me. I felt great!! Then I totally went over my wardrobe. If I knew I wouldn’t wear it or whatever – it was gone. The idea was to throw some change my way. I pondered on a good cologne but wanted something THEY like and what drives them wild:) Trust me women know what they like, you just gotta pry it outta their mind at times. So one day at work I just sparked up a good conversation among the ladies at work. Boy they enjoyed that talk and I walked away with a few good ideas for the very near future:)

  2. This is genius. It suggests applying important principles to growth and success for our personal, social, and psychological growth. Right on man, keep up the good work!

  3. hi all..

    I am 22 and would say that I have had little success with women for the past 2 years at least LOL… i sometimes hesistate in approaching girls in bars as I basically am lost for words once i have the passed the hi (introduction process) … could you recommend 1 proven technique that i can try..

    1. chris, you’ve got to have a level of trust if what you say is cool. you’re at a loss for words because you’re overly concerned about impressing the girl with “the right thing to say” which tongue ties you… it’s also a subtle form of supplication

  4. Yeah soo right,
    Makes no sence living your life to please someone else , you should be the person you were meant to be !
    Time to step out of the shell and be who I’m meant to be and not what I think my parents would want to see !

  5. Yeah… forget the past especially failures… and move on to a new chapter of your life… But remember this… Don’t be afraid to FAIL… make your SHOTS and win… than remembering your failure and afraid to fail again… to fail is just part of the process… don’t be afraid… and just wait for something good will happen… make the good things happen to your LIFE… stand up and take your SHOTS… after all life is so short… LIFE IS WHAT WE MAKE IT… Thank you so much for this forum…

  6. Jesse,

    REALLY really good advice! One “complain” I’ve often heard from women in regards to men studyingh “pick-up” techniques is that what they really want is for a man to just “be himself.”

    And I get what they mean, they don’t want a fake guy. But I’ve always believed the best approach is just what you’re saying here: make the “real you” a better person! Whatever that takes!

    As always, great advice Jesse, thanks.

    PS–There’s a great book that I think would complement anybody who’s already studied the “Blissnosis” material, called “Living the James Bond Lifestyle” and includes some techniques for letting go of past issues that have held a person back or made them feel a lack of confidence.

  7. Jesse,

    So true!! If you keep acting from the past, you will create more of the past. The future will only be more of the past. Thanks for the reminder of this!! To an great uncharted future!!

    1. yep, identity is malleable. most guys don’t even consider that they can be someone else… it’s just assumed that “I’m me” when you can be and act like whoever you really were MEANT to be.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *