Normally, we only think of men as studying advanced seduction psychology and techniques.
Well, there’s a whole class of women who work on their seduction skills as well – in fact, seduction is the basis of their entire livelihood.
I’m talking about strippers and exotic dancers. And believe it or not, the advice I give to men is almost identical to the advice I give to dancers. And by seducing strippers you can learn a thing or two of how they operate.
I have a friend who dances and we’ve watched a few professional dance competitions together. She’s fun to hang out with, even if she’s a little kooky in the head in some ways. And through her I’ve met some of her other stripper friends.
She knew that I study seduction, and as an exotic dancer her income is almost exclusively based on how seductive she can be. So of course she wanted to pick my brain. And the advice I gave her is almost identical to the advice that I give to everyone else.
For instance, when a girl gets up on stage, she has to believe that she is the sexiest, hottest thing ever. She shouldn’t walk, but strut. Guys put down their drinks and notice when a girl’s onstage and walking like a sexy goddess.
Also, a dancer should always keep eye contact. Strong eye contact creates an animalistic communication. A girl who constantly breaks eye contact looks disinterested or aloof and will lose guys’ attention.
I told my dancer friend that even when she doesn’t feel sexy on the outside, consciously make yourself smile, strut, and stand tall. Even if you just do the actions of feeling good inside, you’ll begin to feel the emotion internally too.
Don’t feel sexy? Strut anyway and you’ll feel sexier.
Tired and don’t feel like smiling? Force a smile and your emotions will follow your motions. You’ll begin to feel happier and more upbeat through the very act of smiling.
A dancer always needs to smile. Someone is always watching her. A smile communicates happiness, fun, vitality, and health. A girl doesn’t need the perfect smile – it’s the act itself that is sexy.
A dancer needs to be prepared – do your hair, do your makeup, peacock yourself. If you have a zit, your hair is a mess, or if you don’t feel confident about the outfit that you’re wearing, then relax about it. Being stressed about something will show through and guys will feel it. A down attitude will be a bigger turnoff than whatever is causing the stress in the first place.
And the most important principle to being a successful dancer and making lots of money is to HAVE FUN. The worst mistake I see with so many dancers is that they look BORED.
A dancer always needs to look like she’s having fun and is turned on – as if having fun and feeling hot were the ONLY reasons she ever started dancing in the first place.
I told my dancer friend to joke around with the guys. Make them laugh. Anything can be fun and exciting when you have a smile on your face and the right attitude. But don’t do it in a fake manner. Actually and genuinely experience those great feeling states from the inside. You’ll be a happier person and the guys will feel it too and feel that you’re genuinely happy to be there.
I told her to be enthusiastic. When a guy asks how you’re doing, don’t say, “Good.” Rather, look him in the eye and answer “Fantastic.”
If you meet a guy who is ugly or seems kind of stupid, talk to them too. Talk to EVERYONE. Don’t think of it as lowering your standards. Look at it as practicing your social and communication skills. Look at it as finding what’s best in this person. Remember that you’re also social proofing the room with your smile and great attitude – again, someone is ALWAYS watching.
Okay guys, I want you to now picture two dancers.
The first dancer doesn’t smile and she doesn’t make eye contact with anyone.
She doesn’t strut but just walks around, doing the minimum to get by.
She looks bored.
When she talks to you the first (and often last) thing she asks is if you want a dance. Or maybe she makes a minute of small talk, but it’s stale and you can tell it’s just her routine she’s said hundreds of times before she asks you if you’ll buy a dance.
She only sees you as a dollar sign and she wants to get to the money exchange as fast as possible.
She completely lacks enthusiasm and you can tell she’d rather be doing something else – maybe anything else.
Okay, now how many GUYS do you know who go out to meet, attract, and seduce women who act EXACTLY like this?
They don’t smile, they slouch, the don’t strut, they dress in a boring manner, and they don’t hold eye contact with girls. They have no chance at seducing strippers or any girl for that matter.
They’re not interested in talking to the less attractive ladies, missing opportunities to social proof themselves, but they also lack the confidence to approach the more attractive women.
They don’t look like they’re having fun. When they finally do talk to a girl, they don’t joke, tease, or act lighthearted, but instead see the girl as an empty physical body, and want to get straight to the business of getting her phone number.
Now let’s take our DREAM dancer.
She may or may not be the best looker, but she’s got the best ATTITUDE and great NONVERBAL body language.
She’s got a big smile on her face.
When she dances she locks onto your eyes and holds piercing eye contact while she does her moves.
She struts like she KNOWS she’s hot and sexy.
She exudes an attitude of having FUN.
She talks to EVERYONE – even guys without looks, social skills, or money – and makes them feel good.
When she talks to you, she flirts, jokes, laughs, and is genuinely interested in what you have to say and who you are.
She KNOWS that she’ll get a lot of dances because guys fall in LOVE with her, NOT because she asked them for a dance. Rather, guys ask HER for dances.
Finally, let’s look at the equivalent, successful guy who easily wins the ladies and is good at seducing strippers. We can clearly easily see the crossover.
The ladies man, like the successful exotic dancer, smiles at everyone. He holds piercing eye contact. He has good posture and pushes out his chest like he knows he’s the shit. He’s enthusiastic and has fun no matter what the situation is or who he’s talking with.
And he talks to EVERYONE, guys and girls and he has fun doing it, because he knows the hotties are watching. He’s working the ROOM, not the set.
See how the PUA and the dancer – both in seducers by profession – mirror each other?
Don Juan’s who can seduce strippers and strippers themselves… I bet you never thought you had so much in common!