Here are the top five reasons women cites for starting their affairs:
1. Her man neglecting his physical appearance… lack of masculinity, lack of sexual polarity.
2. Her man losing interest in sex with her.
3. Sex with her man becomes boring.
4. She has constant arguments with her man.
5. Her partner is cheating on her behind her back.
Notice how in all five of cases, the loss of sexual polarity is the underlying reason for the woman cheating behind her man’s back.
Many affairs are about self-esteem. A woman hits her 30s and 40s and suddenly she notices that she’s getting older, and she has less feminine value than she used to. She’s not getting the same looks from men as she used to. She desires to feel youthful again and her man doesn’t turn her on or isn’t attracted to her in that way anymore.
Her man no longer makes her feel like a lover. Six days a week she’s a worker. And once a week she can be a young lover again by taking a new lover on the side.
And while sex is a routine with her man, sex with her lover is often full of pure passion, forceful sex, or loving sex. The sex is freer and uninhibited. Sex with her man is about fulfilling a duty, but sex with her lover is about desire and passion. The affair is as much about fantasy; the woman can be whoever she wants to be with a lover.
Women want to bust out and have fun. Life is short. They want a chance at being carefree and young before it’s too late and they never have a chance to do it again.
Maybe she needs the attention a lover gives her, something her partner doesn’t do since he’s too self involved and preoccupied with work.
Maybe she’s just bored. She wants the excitement to be with a man who is uninhibited and does new things to her that her partner simply won’t.
Or maybe she desires feeling the sensation of being seduced, swept away, or sexually ravished.
Many times women are just bored with their 9 to 5 job, the routine sex, and it’s their secret affair life that gives them a reason to exist. They want a life of sex and fantasy, free of obligations and responsibility. They consider their boyfriends or husbands to be wonderful people but desire the newness, excitement, romance, and adventure that an affair provides.
In all cases, what the lover gives her is a masculine man taking a feminine woman – renewed sexual polarity.
Some women feel guilty about their affairs, and some do not. But in all cases, the woman’s thoughts were consumed with the man that she had the most exciting sex with.
They get the same dopamine spikes you would from a drug. They become obsessed with the lover, buying fancy expensive underwear and getting all made up, doing their hair, and getting a manicure for their date. Their highest priority is regaining their femininity and maintaining sexual polarity for their lover.
And usually couples break up when sexual polarity is weakened and one or the other or both people are mentally or physically cheating on the other.
How Sexual Polarity Decay Leads to Break-ups
A great majority of relationships start out strong and eventually decay with time, many to the breaking point.
At first, sexual polarity is high and it’s “Young Love”. The sex tends to be hot, intense, and passionate. The girl is an illicit sexual treat.
Then the man begins treating the woman like a sexually sacred Madonna and the sex takes a more boring turn. Even beautiful women who are put into the Madonna frame can’t really fulfill a man’s sexual needs. There’s a saying that, “For every beautiful woman, there’s a man who’s tired of fucking her.”
With time they become so used to each other and comfortable that they become Buddies. The woman lets her femininity go and sexual polarity declines.
The man begins fantasizing about other women he knows, starts watching porn, and increasingly has his sexual needs met outside the relationship.
The woman feels neglected and feels less attractive and may start her own affair to get validated or to spice up her life. A break up typically ensues at that point.
Now, things may not progress all the way to a break up. Many couples may tread water in the Buddy stage for years, and yet not stray from the relationship or break up. But the situation is a risky one and unstable one at best, that’s ripe territory for cheating or a break up.
That’s where the “3 year rule” comes from. Three years is about the average time that most relationships last, from the hot intensity of the beginning, down through gradual decay of sexual polarity until one or the other is tempted away.
And here is the BIG MISTAKE that guys make.
They think that being in a relationship will solve all their problems. They think that it means all the hot sex they want and all the companionship they want. They think they only need to find a super hot girl or maybe their soul mate or true love and then they’ll be truly happy.
But that initial phase of the relationship with high sexual polarity where you feel a high, a euphoria, bliss, ecstasy – it doesn’t last.
It doesn’t last if you see and treat women as sexually sacred Madonna’s. A Madonna will inevitably fail to meet your sexual needs, your deepest sexual desires. She’ll soon stop dressing for you, begin to put on weight, and start talking back. Sexual polarity is shot. And soon your mind and your eye will begin wandering again. And pretty soon you end up with an unhappy woman that starts her own affair or has her own fantasies of other men in her life behind your back.
Maybe you get into a new relationship, but the whole thing starts right over from the beginning with the same old ending.
Don’t Be A Jealous Man! Let Your Woman Shine
Unfortunately, some men take absolutely no action to increase a woman’s sexual value and attractiveness. They’re not interested in Blossoming their woman.
Most men don’t encourage a woman to wear makeup, most men don’t go shopping with a woman for sexy clothes or shoes, most men don’t suggest to a woman to get her hair or nails done, and most men have little interest in having a woman go to a gym.
These men typically seek women of high value through fantasy, adult films, strip clubs, or eyeing other women.
At the same time, they’re insecure about having their own woman have higher sexual value.
If their own woman was glammed up, wearing heels, a sexy dress, makeup, her hair done, colored contacts, the man would start to feel jealous or uncomfortable.
The idea that his woman could be sexy enough to get attention and sexual interest from other men drives him, unconsciously, to keeping her looking frumpy and dull.
These same men fantasize about fantasy women who dress sexy and are outwardly sexual while he tries to keep his own woman an asexual and unappealing “Madonna”.
If his woman’s sexual attractiveness were to rise, that would be a threat to him, because if she’s attractive to other men, he might have some competition or he might not feel worthy of having a high value woman.
Most guys aren’t even conscious of their insecurity. Sure, we’ve all seen jealous men who don’t let their girlfriends or wives dress up or go out. But most guys hold their woman’s sexual attractiveness back in a more passive way.
Some men allow a woman to eat anything she wants and doesn’t make her do any sort of exercise.
Some men don’t take her out so that she has no reason to ever display herself sexually.
Some men tell a woman that buying clothes or makeup is a waste of money.
Many guys will even lower their own attractiveness to in turn lower their woman’s. The man starts dressing down and doesn’t take the time to groom himself, or he puts on weight. In an attempt to match the sexual value of her man, the woman follows his habits. This is all done unconsciously.
A lot of relationships follow this exact progression– during courtship, the woman dresses sexy and stays fit and in physical shape. As the relationship progresses however, the man passively allows her to get out of shape, doesn’t take her out to social events, and doesn’t encourage her to wear sexy clothes anymore.
But when the woman doesn’t look sexy on the exterior, she doesn’t feel sexy on the interior. She no longer feels like a sexual woman. Rather, she starts to feel like an old woman.
Pretty soon, the man loses interest in his woman sexually.
She wants passionate, rip-the-sheets sex, but she feels undesirable and inhibited. A woman dressed down and eating bon-bons isn’t going to be enthusiastic to striptease for her man or act out wild sexual fantasies.
But a woman enthusiastically encouraged to show off her sexuality outwardly to the world will be enthusiastically eager to reveal her inward sexuality.
A woman who looks sexy on the outside is going to feel sexy on the inside. She’s going to want to ACT sexy in the bedroom and will be highly suggestible to your commands.
So don’t be a jealous man. Openly encourage and direct her sexual attractiveness and glamming her up to new heights.