Negging Hate Mail

I moved all the nasty comments from my posts on negging over to here.  At first I tried answering, but quickly realized some girls just want to vent.

In addition, the video below is an ode to the nasty comment trolls.

Thank You Hater! - by Clever Pie and Isabel Fay

294 comments

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  • lol i’m a girl and never in my life have i seen negging work on anyone ever usually the response is kind of like ‘ok…?’ and thinking you’re a weird loser. but by all means continue…

  • GiWow talk about taken out of context.. Listen we are not doing this to hurt them. Everyone has there bad of tricks get them s somewhere. Such as smiling to get someone else to smile or ignoring someone to get there attention. Not every has a strong mentality when someone ignores them. But what everyone knows that all of this ties down to egos. Of course women are probably not going agree on this. You can extremely attracted to someone and spill your heart out to them..but the second you disrespect them its “GO TIME”. I agree some guys take this out of context and just insult mildy at the women. Which is bad. Just playful teaseing lines thats all. Girls and boys both neg not matter what you believe. Even if a so called pua has to post it they still dodo it . We are all doing it because we like you..its puppy dog lov that. Thats why its important to learn ho so wOf c

  • Just so you know, most of these comments you’re getting aren’t “nasty”. Many of them are simply logically trying to explain to you the profound error of your ways.
    And so what if a few commentators couldn’t control their anger at reading an absurd article that promotes misogynistic behavior(however subtle it may be)? As far as I’m concerned you deserve every bit of hate mail that you are receiving. I hope that you actually allow some of these comments to sink into your thick skull so you finally realize why your “negging” technique is so wrong.

  • Negging =

    Ned Flanders’ dad: “I’ve tried nothing and I’m all out of ideas.”

    And to quote from the show created by noted misogynist Seth MacFarlane :

    Greg: Straight women don’t ask for much, do they?
    Stan: They really don’t. Just use coasters now and again and don’t whiz in the shower on her birthday.

    Somehow, I just doubt having really low standards is the best way to start relationship with anyone of quality.

  • This is ridiculous. If someone said I had lint in my hair I’d probably say “Oh, thanks” and take it out. It doesn’t knock me down a peg or anything but I know it would upset many women.

    And why do you assume that all “beautiful” women are bitches? You don’t know them, you don’t know what their life is like. Just because a girl wears a short skirt doesn’t mean she’s a tramp or whatever. Stop being so surface and quick to judge. And why would you rate women on a 1 to 10 scale? I lost all faith in just that. We have enough comparison to the “ideals of female beauty” in the media, don’t fan the flames. In my past experience, I respond to a guy the most when he brings up honest conversation. I’m in a university town so usually the best opener is “Hi, my name is… So do you go the university/college? What do you study? Oh, I know someone in that program, I’ve heard it’s very… Could you tell me more about it? I’m taking… or I work at…”

    And seriously, would you guys like to be negged? “Aww, your arms are so hair, like a monkey!” :mrgreen: “Oh, you’re kinda short. You remind me of a hobbit.” :mrgreen: “Ooh you’re super tall, like an oak tree” :mrgreen: “Woah you guys, do you ever get to speak or what?” :mrgreen: If a girl did this then she would be seen as a) a dumb blonde/brunette/whatever or b) a huge bitch, no matter how playfully it was said.

    And I think that the self-proclaimed “nice guys” aren’t usually that nice. If they are only friends with you so that they can try to get into your pants, then that is extremely manipulative. You are using a friendship in hopes of gaining sex.

    Just a Canadian female perspective.

  • No one who’s defending “negging” seems to realize the language they’re using. It’s full of “bringing her down a level” and “don’t let her have any power” and “dominate”, creepy things like that. You all can repeat to yourselves that this behavior isn’t misogynistic (although someone BEING misogynistic doesn’t get to tell people who are EFFECTED by misogyny what is or isn’t misogynistic -you do not get to define others’ experiences as it doesn’t effect you) but when you speak like this about women, it’s obviously that that’s not true. You’re talking like honest to god predators. And that’s not “playful”, that’s straight up scary. As a woman, I’d never go home with anyone who employs negging if this is the mindset behind it because I’m not sure I’d make it out alive after reading all these comments singing it’s praises. You all seem to think you deserve women way out of your league and you all seem incredibly resentful that the women you shoot for seem to feel you should re-evaluate your standards. Perhaps look into some nice girls? There’s so much hostility directed at attractive women, as if all women are a monolith, all women have the same experiences, all women want the exact same things and can be programmed interchangeably like machines to react to your charms. Instead of us being people as well with individual experiences and preferences. You complain how we don’t see that nor appreciate that in you all but then you refuse to do so in us. We’re not allowed to be people to you and yet you have temper tantrums for when some of us want to do the same to you. This, gentlemen, is all misogyny. To keep insisting it’s not illustrates you maybe just don’t know what this word means.

  • I’d like to add that there is no such thing as a hot girl.

    Your conception of “the hot girl” is fueled by the media and what they claim is attractive. If the media popularized your idea of a “fat girl” then that would be the more popular look.

    Referring to girls as hot or fat is rude, since everyone is attractive in their own way.

    You can not judge someone’s weight based on how they talk online. You can’t even base it on how they look. A 135 pound woman can carry her weight very differently from another woman of the same weight.

    Also, men are the same. Men shouldn’t be judged on weight either, so any woman turning a man down based on weight would be just as rude as a man doing it.

    Because everyone is beautiful, this invalidates the claim of, “So if you’re a normal-looking girl with a normal attitude, you probably will NEVER BE NEGGED in your life. So for crying-out-loud, don’t worry about it.”

    There is literally someone for everyone. A girl one guy finds attractive might not seem that way to another.

    And by the way, just because one guy knows the supposed “limit” of negging or knows negging is “just for in a club” doesn’t mean all guys do. Providing this misleading information assists these guys in negging a woman “too much” or out of context.

    Let’s just be polite to everyone of all genders and realize that the overall best way to attract the opposite sex is to be yourself, whether that is a literal asshole, or an actual nice guy, not “Nice Guy.”

  • This is petty bullshit that perpetuates shitty stereotypes about ‘daddy’s girls’ and ‘nice guys’. If a girl fucking rejects you, just leave her alone. She doesn’t owe you her time, especially if you going to be an immature jackass about it.

  • If the only way for you to get laid is through devaluing women, there’s a reason you’re not getting laid in the first place.

    Spoiler alert: it’s because you’re a piece of shit.

  • It’s cute that you refer to men as human beings while you’re treating women like objects. It must be hard to accept that the reason no woman talks to you is because you are an unattractive douchebag who will never achieve any of the goals they set in life, so I really do offer my sympathy.

  • The author of this article is obviously extremely insecure… If you think you’re so unlikeable that you have to insult a girl in order to get her to pay attention to you, then you need to take a step back and really look at yourself. If you knew what your own positive attributes were, you probably wouldn’t feel the need to point out other people’s flaws.

  • Of all the ways to pick up a lady, this has got to be one of the dumbest. You’re being told by actually women that this won’t work, and you still refuse to see how ignorant this is. How about, instead, you treat women like goddamn people. Don’t demean and insult them to get their attention, idiot.

  • oh my god, you are a major douchebag like seriously if i saw you on the street i would kick you in the balls. like, do you seriously think girls are so shallow that we’ll think “oh he thinks i’m ugly oh my god this is such a huge problem!” girls will take offence if someone says something that makes them seem ugly because we don’t want to be ugly, not because they’re used to every single guy liking them. it doesn’t make you seem better. it just makes you seem like a douchebag. please learn some better flirting techniques before you try and get a girlfriend. for the sake of humanity and your balls, man. /for the sake of humanity and your balls/

  • OKay so let me just say this… If a girl is pretty its okay to be a douchebag to them? So long as they’re freaking gorgeous you can be as much of an asshole as you want!
    And the reason girls “pretend like the guy doesn’t even exist” at clubs and such is because you go to clubs to flirt/hook up or just enjoy yourself with your friends. If you’re not interested then BY NO MEANS are you obligated to pretend otherwise.
    A lot of time in situations like these if you give a guy an inch, he’ll take a mile. By ignoring him or declining him you’re being straightforward and making sure that he doesn’t get the wrong idea.
    Poor, poor neglected men! How could women be so cruel as to not pay them attention when they owe nothing to them. Lets take them down from their high horses, how dare they believe themselves to be human beings entitled to their own choices! How dare they not look at men when they so request it!
    Therefore the only way is to insult them, belittle them so that they will know the true suffering of men and the rejection they have endured. Lets prey on their insecurities and doubts, make them once more feel inferior to men, their rightful place! It is only fair since if men give women attention it should be returned! BUT OH, ONLY THE HOT ONES. Since every man is hot 😆

  • Dear Bastards,
    All of you “nice guys” are cowardly would-be rapists who believe that because you have done something “nice” for a girl you are interested in, that she owes you some sexual favor.

    You have created a culture which finds plenty of ways to make women feel commercialized and worthless, and forces them to worry about appearances and norms which fit into your pea sized molding of the “desirable woman,” but you wonder why a woman might be put off by being treated as some machine which you input your so called “niceness” and receive some variety of pleasure in return.

    A woman never owes you sex, in fact a woman never owes you slobs anything. You are not “nice” guys. You are misogynists who will never see women as anything but objects which you feel entitled to. May you never find a girlfriend.

    -Noah

  • Oh man this site is comedic GOLD. I so will use this next time I think a girl deserves to have their self-esteem knocked down inadvertently because of my remarks.

    No. Stop.

    Seriously if you think this shit is worth doing it on a girl, none the less a woman, then you have most likely won yourself ‘Douche of The Year’ because no woman wants to be put down because of her looks or anything like that.

    And please, do NOT get me on this ‘Nice Guy’ bullshit, I have had ENOUGH of that.

    Women shouldn’t be put into awkward positions because of men.

    Women shouldn’t be in awkward positions PERIOD because of men.

    This article is just another way of putting women down because of this or that reason.

    I sure as hell know my mother raised me better than this, and ya’lls mothers should have as well.

  • From the opinion of an actually attractive girl, the reply is completely different. I feel like the girls commenting are not the ones “negging” even applies to. I know this works. Guys that are not a challenge are boring, I don’t even pay attention to them when they come over with their overused pickup lines. It doesn’t hurt your feelings, it puts you in check. I spend the entire time having an ego boost from the idiots that tried and failed but it’s a waste if no one comes and creates a challenge. After a while you start to notice when a guy is “negging” you because he is attracted to you, and I appreciate it when someone’s intelligent enough to realize I need a challenge.

    • And you’d rather have that than someone who would just skip mindgames and just want to get to know you? I mean I know you think you’re hot shit and the world just bows to your every whim-

      You know what? Fuck it, whatever, go breed with one of these bastards and create the next Stalin, see how that goes.

    • Maybe you enjoy it, but most girls would not. That’s fine! You can’t help what you enjoy. But men should realize that they need to take time to get to know the girl before they try something like that, definitely not right off the bat.

  • Ahahahaha, yeah, insulting people before trying to fuck them is TOTALLY gonna work. I’m glad don’t bother going to the shitholes where fucks like you crawl.

  • as a “hot girl” who sometimes is “negged” i’m sorry to say dudes but it doesn’t work. it’s embarrassing for you because it shows how insecure you are, and there’s no one i “blow off” quicker than a dude who negs.

  • So I did a quick research look up and pulled two articles:
    Pick-Up lines: To Use a Neg or a Flippant? (Hendon, 2012)
    and
    An Evolutionary Perspective on Effective vs. Ineffective Pick-up Lines (Senko & Fyffe, 2010)

    Guess what both found? Yeah, “neg” pick-up lines are the least likely to get you even a conversation.

  • Wow, I love how the last comments are all putting this whole thing down and none or the “dude-bros” are crawling out of the woodwork to defend themselves.

    Either the rest abandoned the jerk who wrote this, or they got bored of being wrong OR (and probably the case) the dude-bros/”Nice Guys” moved on to other places (to be assholes there too).

    I’m glad people didn’t just let this crap fly.

  • The point is not the fact that the statements are said in a “playful” way. It’s the fact that you feel the need to “bring her down to your level.”

    And how do you tell if a girl’s only used to guys kissing her ass? Is there a certain look? Is there some tattoo written across their foreheads?

    No, and there shouldn’t be. Yeah, some girls can be snobby but think about it this way: if some guy came walking up to you while you were trying to hang out with your friends would you want to be nice to that guy? Would you want to sleep with that guy who’s only comment to you in the first place is the first thing he sees wrong with you?

    Oh, and if you have to tell people you’re a “nice guy” then chances are you aren’t a nice guy. This whole nice guys finish last is bullshit. Why can’t men have women as just friends? Is there something wrong with just wanting a friend? Would you want to have sex with the woman who does nothing but hit on you in weird, uncomfortable ways?

    Would you want to have sex with the woman who seeks you out, talks to you like this: “Hey, you have something in your teeth, haha. That’s cool right? Hey you want to go have sex or something? No? Well, what. Am I not good enough for you? I’m a nice woman. What makes you better than me, huh? I’m just saying.” and then refuses to leave you to carry on your conversation with your friends?

    If you do, then you really need to re-think your life choices.

  • Regardless of how a woman may look or behave, subjecting her to negative commentary in order to stimulate approval-seeking behavior by exploiting her insecurities is BULLYING.
    It’s demeaning, it’s harassment.
    Any man who uses this technique deserves the loneliness that drove him to it.
    How about, start treating women with respect (no, respect doesn’t mean “ass-kissing” dipshit) as if they’re (gasp) people.
    Intelligent, kind, beautiful people are drawn to each other. So be intelligent, kind, and beautiful in all the ways that matter.
    And if someone doesn’t notice you or like you, hey. Their loss. Move on and find someone who sees you without your having to resort to tricks and gimmickry.
    If a man uses these tactics, it simply says that he has no confidence in his ability to organically attract women with his body and mind. He has to cut away at her body, mind, clothing, social standing, etc — just in hopes that she’ll respond positively. How sad. And that’s not even taking into account that most women will respond negatively (heyo, attention-seeking behavior caused by insecurity is negative). He’s not even considering that women possessed of self-respect will turn him down for being cruel and petulant, and will still take home the verbal wounds.
    It doesn’t matter how objectively beautiful or hot the woman is, SHE IS A PERSON. Do not demean her. It doesn’t matter how plain or uninspiring a woman may be, SHE IS A PERSON. Do not demean her.
    Hey, how about, instead of fawning over someone like a limp noodle, you use your conversational skills to engage the person? Or read their body language, see if they want you to come on to them at all.
    When a woman rejects you, it is not an excuse to bring her down, at any level. And yes, that is exactly what this article proposes men do. Find a way to “level” the standing — one insecure little boy thinking the queen is above him.
    In this case, she is.
    This article is petty, ignorant, and weak. So is everyone who agrees with it.

  • Wow. Not only was this utterly despicable, but the alleged “Nice Guy” has reared its ugly head! I’ve stumbled upon a true gem here!

    Here’s a quick lesson on why claims that men have it so much worse in the dating scene (or in general) are, to put it lightly, bullshit: you think we somehow owe you something — namely sex — as compensation for, what? Being polite? Restraining yourself from assaulting your date in the back alley? Congratulations asshole, you have imitated the behavior of a decent human being!

    But no, you assure me, I’ve got it all wrong! It’s not nice, NORMAL girls like you that we futilely attempt to tear down; it’s just those nasty skanks who have the nerve to reject my advances! Because I’m a goddamn sex symbol, and any woman who doesn’t want to have sex with me is a soulless harpy!

    Not only does this notion you “Nice Guys” seem to have reek of slut-shaming, it also further displays your lack of basic social understanding. Note how the women mercifully spared of your negging are supposedly “responding positively”, by which you mean making polite conversation. But say she politely turns you down, because as a human being with rights supposedly protected by the constitution, she has the right to do so. Then, she suddenly transforms into a prude/slut/whore/bitch who is laughing at your torment. This is a common notion, unfortunately, so many women who do not wish to be pursued by someone will attempt to dissuade men making a move on her by hinting that they really don’t want to get with you, so please stop. Obviously, the woman loses no matter what she does (you might notice that this is a recurring theme.)

    And continuing to hit on them, especially when they’ve explicitly asked you to stop? That’s fucking nerve-wracking. Even in “safe” neighborhoods, women who aren’t even by themselves are harassed by men who think they’re “just paying a compliment.” They actually don’t think that, of course, but gosh darn it if those women folk aren’t the ficklest things! It’s almost like they aren’t there for our sexual exploitation or something!

    You think we’re being paranoid, but are you even aware of how many rapes occur each year? The numbers are far, far bigger than what is reported, let alone taken to court. Do you know why so few are reported? Because we’re the ones to blame, according to you. We were dressed too sluttily, we didn’t fight enough, we led him on, we shouldn’t have walked down the goddamn street to get to work if we didn’t want to be raped, WE’RE JUST LYING.

    Here’s the thing: rape, you may be surprised to know, is almost never a result of sexual desire. It’s the need to make a fellow human being POWERLESS. To strip them of their dignity. They know their victim will not be able to make sure they are punished for his monstrous crime, and that’s the point. The victims’ autonomy is taken away and they are in effect made something less than human in society’s eyes.

    So when you refuse to back off, or even start insulting– I’m sorry, “negging” –a woman? It’s time you took a good, long look in the mirror.

  • how many nice guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? who knows, they’ll just act nice and get pissed when it wont screw

  • Negging just seems stupid. No woman gets only positive attention from men, no man ever gets only positive attention from women. Even playfully using this is enough to hurt someone, you don’t know why they’re so closed off. Maybe its because they don’t have any confidence and negging just makes it worse for them. I don’t think negging is the way to get any positive attention from anyone, it’s just stupid

  • So this is supposed to work in club setting and I’m a 22 yr old living in a pretty club-centered city (Miami). Now, I’ve had this done to me countless times and let me tell you, nothing shuts me or my friends down faster than a guy approaching us with rude comments. Whether this works on other girls, I don’t know. I’ve never seen negging work, is all I’m saying. Negs have included crap like:

    *Tugs a strand* “Wow, you should cut your hair.”
    “You’re short even with those heels on!”
    “This isn’t the dance floor, come I’ll show you where to dance” while standing with a group of friends by the bar

    They just make you seem socially awkward, you know?

  • women are not obligated to greet every dumb fuck who enters a nightclub
    just like men don’t have to respond to every woman that comes up to them

    pointing out a woman’s insecurities in order to get her to sleep with you because she’s highly attractive and therefore must be egotistical is the epitome of compensating for your small dicks and own inner inferiority.

    your mother must be so proud.

  • To the “nice guys finish last” argument – nice people don’t expect constant reward for their deeds. Also, just because some men are kind doesn’t mean I’m obligated to go out with every gentle encounter I come across.

    Secondly, I have no idea how you can post “Negging women is ideal for really hot girls – 8s, 9s, and 10s. For an average girl (6s, 7s), you don’t want to use value zingers” and not expect a violent backlash. Not only is this ragingly sexist (a word which I don’t fling around) but totally demeaning. Chances are that most of the men reading this are 5s or less, which is the most hypocritical aspect.

    Thirdly, ‘negging’ might work on eighteen-year-old club girls who are, for the most part, inexperienced and immature. It might land you a lay, which seems to be the objective anyway. But this won’t work on smart women. It will annoy the shit out of them. I’m not even saying this because I find it sexist; I’m saying this because I’ve had this happen to me many times and most of us can’t be fucked playing juvenile games with juvenile men.

    The world doesn’t owe you a pretty girlfriend, especially if you use strategies from an article pretending to be founded in actual psychology. Be nice to people because it’s the right thing to fucking do.

    • “”The world doesn’t owe you a pretty girlfriend”
      “Be nice to people because it’s the right thing to fucking do.”

      So fucking poignant. You rock.

  • I wouldn’t say I’m particularly attractive, i’ve done some modelling and get some attention but i wouldn’t say i was a 9 or 10. I am of two opinions about negging. Some of the negs mentioned above are a little creepy… And i think it can very easily be abused by some guys who either don’t get it or do get it and just want to use it to get laid by airheads and silly girls that it would work on (just because you’ve been negged doesn’t mean you fall into this catagory, but maybe that tiny dress and tonnes of make-up made it look like you were, or the guy is a douche). On the other hand, it seems like a way to get some cheeky banter going if.used well. I’m quite happy for a bit of cheeky banter (doesn’mean i’ll open my legs but i’ll have a conversation) and if it gors well and the banter is fun then yes that person would stand out. The way the article is written is open to easy misinterpretation as it does give pdf a certain bitter and demeaning tone. However, I’m sure that this its due to a silly minority of overtly attractive girls abusing their power to play on less attractive makes to take advantage and they fell for it. On both sides of this it shows the theme of attractive assholes being the reason for retaliation. I feel both sides are wrong and in an ideal world this negging wouldn’t be needed some attractive people wouldn’t have their heads up their asses (giving bad names to those potentially attractive nice people who im sure are out there but less attention is drawn to those than assholes) and would actually give people a chance. The reality is we don’t live in an ideal world. And I’m sure that these ‘attractive assholes ‘ have given people a chance before and found many of these ‘nice guys’ to, in reality, just be guys interested in getting into their pants and could not give a shit about what the attractive person is saying anyway. And those that aren’t like that? Find a way to stand out, which when used correctly negging gives that oppotunity, i wish there was a different way and to be honest it gets abused by assholes just wanting to get laid which means in all reality its still not a huge help to ‘nice guys’. Negging wouldn’t work on me as i prefer to know the person a little before some good banter, and i do give those nice guys a chance to say hi still, but im not a 9 or 10.

    Wouldn’t it be so much easier if when we went out people haf wristbands or something as a sign of ‘just looking to get laid’… It would save so many games on either side…

  • Negging would work on me. I’m fine with the way I look, I respect myself, I’d never do anything against my own morals and I can hold my own, but if someone was to come up to me and use any of those lines i’d probably work, well i’d at least talk to them for a while etc.
    It would work because I probably neg guys out too. I don’t call it that, but I’m sarcastic and blunt and a bit of an asshole, which is why I like guys who can dish it as much as they can take it.

  • Yeah, love how you people keep putting “nice guys” in quotes because it shows that you are, in fact, NOT a nice guy.

    A nice guy wouldn’t use a neg against a woman.

    If a woman blows you off, forget about her, she wasn’t interested and lowering her self worth isn’t going to make a damn bit of difference except show how pathetic a “nice guy” like you is. A real nice guy would get that she’s not interested and move on, not start treating women like shit because of it.

    Let’s reverse the situation for a second: If a man isn’t interested in a woman, she doesn’t drop negs on him, she goes away and if she doesn’t, she’s labeled as ‘desperate’ or ‘pathetic.’ Why is it not the same for guys who hang around when they’re not wanted?

    Grow up, put your big girl panties on, and shut up.

  • This is disgustingly demeaning to women. To all guys reading this who looking to find a partner: do not neg those you seek to relate to! Treat her like a human being. Not a prize to be won.

  • In the rebuttal section you imply that it is unfair for men to experience rejection from women they want to sleep with. Aside from the fact that sleeping with a person is not the be-all and end-all of relationships or women’s interests, you missing the REAL truth of why women reject women; they are avoiding rape.

    Now you’re probably thinking that’s ridiculous because you’re not a rapist and not all men are rapists and that’s very unfair to your poor hurt feelings etc etc (although using false pretenses to get into a girl’s pants is pretty rapey and totally despicable). But you don’t know what it’s like to be faced with the constant barrage of rape information – some of it facts, some of it fear-mongering, all of it judgmental and confusing – that women have lived with their entire lives.

    If a man approaches you in a bar, your first instinct is SUPPOSED to be rejection because he could be a potential rapist. After all, 1 in 3 women are raped in their lifetime and you’ll do anything to avoid being that 1. If you’re interested in him for any reason, you might chat and get to know him and feel comfortable with him, but if you’re not it’s best to avoid talking to him or else people will say you ‘led him on.’ And then you will get blamed for being raped, or no one will believe you, or even if he doesn’t rape you he might become a stalker or otherwise antagonistic when he realizes that you don’t want to sleep with him.

    Not all women behave this way, it’s true, and more power to them. I don’t know where this myth that women “enjoy” rejecting nice guys comes from, because as far as I know that’s ridiculous. They’re really just watching their asses because they don’t need some guy, not taught to value women as human beings, starting to behave badly. Women are in this double-edged sword where it’s their fault if a guy rapes them and it’s their fault if a guy feels rejected by them. Even just talking to guy can get you ‘in trouble’. Which makes you wonder why we even bother to go out to bars in the first place.

  • Who cares if negging works to get a girl? Why is everyone’s problem about whether it works? I wish to God all girls, no matter what their looks, were able to realize that any boy who treats you this way isn’t worth going after. But there ARE girls who will get won over by this. And I’m glad there are men out there who realize this is a huge waste of time.

    Men, if you work hard in life and find a steady job, you’ll get girls. You will. That’s honestly one of the biggest turn-ons there is. You don’t need to turn to this ‘negging’ nonsense. At the very least, just talk to them like you would a friend. You’ll find yourself in a happier relationship than you ever would by negging.

  • You guys are hilarious, you know that?

    Seriously. I’ve been laughing the entire time reading through this, and it’s kind of hilarious. Especially when there’s people that think this works, LOL.

    Y’all are desperate little fuckers, aren’t ya?

  • Well, well, well.
    1. If you think this bullshit will help you, then you’re: a) An idiot, b) Delusional and/or c) A misogynistic virgin.

    2. Degrading women only leads to an ignorant society, to ignorant males.

    3. Seduction is very different from subtly offending women; “Seduction Science”? Come the fuck on.

    4. Fuck you.

    5. Girls, I know you will never fall for this shit, so if you notice a guy is trying to “neg” you (whatever the fuck they mean with that, anyway), feel free to kick them in the balls.

    I know it isn’t necessary to point out how disgusting this ‘macho’ bullshit is. But anyway.

    If I ever personally notice a guy treating a girl like this, I will kick him in the balls.

    You, stupid assholes need to realize that this is a new generation and sexism has to stop. Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. No one will EVEN look at you.

    bye.

    • God, THANK you. The sexism here is ridiculous. At least there are some other people with dicks and a brain out there, holy fuck.

  • “Rejected”- Who ever thought we owed you anything in the first place? You have no right into our pants. Even if study shows ‘that we’ll cheat on you’, you have NO RIGHT to try and bring a lady’s self confidence down. We have to deal with enough SHIT from each other, even if it’s an ‘innocent little comment’ from you guys, it could be enough to push us off the handle. WHO GIVES A FUCK IF WE’RE GORGEUS. IF WE IGNORE YOU, THEN THAT MEANS WE WERE HAVING A CONVERSATION OR WE SIMPLY DO NOT WANT TO TALK TO YOU. YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO TALK TO US.

  • okay wow cronus dis s) (it you?

    but seariously buoys, gills, don’t getc) (a fins in a twist over t) (is kinda crap. not cool yo. gills skiff some mut) (afuckas start trying to mako on you: give em t) (e trident. ) (e aint treating you like you is a person wit) ( real eelings t) (en swim away for the ) (alibut

    and skiff y’all guys t) (ink this gon work nuh uh you is sadly mistunaken. you aint a girl you cant just say “dem bitc) (es need a betta nice buoy” because believe me ive seen it before, aint t) (at rig) (t cronus?
    ) (otties don’t need yo kelp, t) (ey can give you t) (e cold sc) (oalder just like you is allowed to reject women. it all equal.

    now i t) (ink we all missing t) (e real point w) (ic) ( is: offta kill skull demon lord asshole w) (os wit me?

  • Maybe the reason a girl doesn’t want to go out with you is maybe you’re an asshole. If you’re a ‘nice guy’ who has bad luck with women, you might not be a nice as you think you are.

  • Let me guess, an overbearing, controlling Mother growing up as a child and several rejections as a young man? Honestly, I’m seriously sorry this is how you’ve been warped to think of women, in terms of numbers and strategies you think you’re able to apply to us as a whole, rather than individuals. I thought I was angry at first reading it, but now, I’m more just sad. It really makes me sad that someone can view an entire /half/ of our species as a collective that can just be tricked into an artificial relationship with cheap tricks. And honestly, I don;t think a happy, confident person could honestly think this way. I think something must have really effected when you were young to make you view females this way, and for that I’m sorry.

    I know an internet comment isn’t going to make you change your opinion, but do at least try and realize that women are not stupid. We are not robots, we are not sheep. You can’t hack into our brains and make us think about you a certain way, especially not with insults. This sort of behavior worries me, because just because you perceive a woman as beautiful doesn’t mean she feels that way about herself. You don’t know what she could be feeling. And having random men on the streets insulting her? You never know if you could be the one to make her want to never wake up in the morning.

    I know I shouldn’t write this, I know it’s useless, but it just makes me feel so deeply, deeply sad to hear you rate girls like their thick cuts of meat, then justify what you’re doing by saying “you have it way worse” without ever seeing it from the woman’s perspective at all. Referring to them as if they’re dumb animals you can train to jump through hoops and straight at your dick. It doesn’t work that way, and I’m sorry that you think it does. You just seem like a sad, sad person.

  • ((I apologize in advance if grammar and spelling is off. I’m tired and pissed off. Might as well put in the trigger warning of rape and rape culture for good measure too.))
    You know what’s funny?
    I’m suppose to eat this bullshit up.
    I used to think shit like the “friendzone” was a thing I as a respectable lady was suppose to be obligated to. And you know what? It’s complete and utter bullshit.
    I can see you’re trying to display some sort of “alpha-male” esque aura to “pick up the hotties.” And that, if you do not harass a woman (under the context of a “playful-why-can’t-you-take-a-joke-and-fuck-me-already” idea), THEN GUESS WHO’S THE CHUMP!
    I have a feeling this is supposed to be some sort of satirical article, but I know some of these commenters are in fact just making a loud cacophonic harangue. And so I just want say things the way they are.
    1. Women are human beings. Crazy, right? Because every girl you “neg” on is obligated to drop panties and bend over. Btw, if you don’t have her full consent, you could be arrested for RAPE.
    2. Now that last bit was a little harsh wasn’t it? Rape?! “Oh, but I’M NOT A RAPIST!!” Well, by the way I see it, your natural state is rapist. Woman have to act, dress and interact with you a certain way or else the it’s time for you to rape! (Bare with me, I’m being a snarky little shit who wants to make you pay.)
    3. Negging, negging, motherfucking negging. Really? “You know that shirt makes your chest look so big, you should cover that up.” Who gives a shit. “Your hair is awfully greasy today, why is it so short?” Motherfucker I just got back from work, and I like the style. Really, all of these “negs” can be dismissed with a “who-fucking-cares” outlook.

    I think y’all mothafuckas need Jesus. Kidding of course, but seriously though; from my understanding you want to be the big STRONG man! Well, guess what? Not crying makes you weak. The point of Feminism is to both empower women’s right, and basically let guys know that being feminine really isn’t the end of the world! Guys are allowed to be meek, just as girls are allowed to say “no.” With all of this misogynism bullshit, you hurt everyone of LGBT community by making up a strict “masculinity” perch.

    But there are so many “dude-bro-nice-guys” who are so ignorant and CONCEITED in their own little world that they think this is socially acceptable.

    To all the dudebros and niceguys, and assholes and bastards:
    Fuck you.
    You don’t understand women and call the misandry card. I am terrified of announcing freely that I am pansexual BECAUSE YOU FETISHIZE LESBIANISM TO THE POINT THAT TWO GIRLS CAN’T BE TOGETHER. I realize I’m getting off topic here, but there *shouldn’t* be a reason for me to say that. There *shouldn’t* be a reason to ask for someone to have some decent goddamn respect for my gender and stoop to “tatics” like this.
    And the saddest part of all is: I’m a thirteen year old girl who has a better perception on social justice than all of you fuckasses put together. See? You made me use “fuckass” which is hardly suitable enough for any of you.
    I’m tired, I’m angry and I just want you people to wake up from under the rock you’ve been hiding under.

    I don’t care if you say I’m too young to understand you sociopathic neanderthals. I don’t care if that motherfucker Rob just says “oh this ratchet bitch is just mad.” I don’t care if I’m feeding the trolls. I want my voice to be heard, because I want my opinions to matter.
    And if you’re really gonna pull the “stop eating and get out of your sweatpants” line on me, who the fuck cares? Child see and child do. Believe me, some of these guys need to take their own advice.

  • What the hell!?!?!? Why would you assume just because a girl is attractive that she has high self esteem? For all you know she could be on the brink of suicide and you just pushed her over the edge! Girls have just as hard of a time getting a good guy as guys do to girls! This is absolutely ridiculous and misogynistic.

  • Wow. This makes me laugh way more than it should have.

    Are you guys idiots or something??? As a woman, I say that this shit doesn’t work.

    Seriously, a guy being an asshole to me isn’t going to get me going “Ohhhh no, he doesn’t like me??!!!!!!111one!!!11? I mUST get him to lieeekkk me ahhhHHhhhHHHHhh!!!!!11eleven1!!” It’s going to get me going “Hey, fuck you too!”. Although, most of the time their comments would be ignored because if they honestly think that negging me would get me attracted to them they’re not worth my oxygen.

    Seriously. As a girl, I want someone to be NICE to me, not be a total dickhead. I want a man to like me for who I am and say that clearly.

    If you want a girl, be nice to them. Compliment them, flatter them by saying nice things. Say that she’s pretty, or say that she’s really nice herself. But telling her she’s ugly or insulting her? Wow. You have amazed me with your utter ignorance.

    You know what, never mind. Why am I even posting this? I think it’d be much more entertaining to have a douche like the guys that wrote this try to come up and insult me to get me to like them. Let’s see if they still think that when I kick them in the balls.

  • Hey asshole!!! Here’s a really fucking easy way to get girls to at least consider you instead of flipping your sad ass off and ‘rejecting’ you!

    TREAT THEM LIKE NORMAL GODDAMN HUMAN BEINGS!!!!

    Is that so hard? Making small talk, relating to them, asking them nicely, offering to by drinks if at a club, easy shit like that!!

    This guy is obviously the hugest fucking douche the world has ever known. And you say they aren’t meant to be emotionally degrading-

    Bull.
    Fucking.
    Shit.

    Why would any girl want to boink your brains out if you insulted her?!

    This is basically what the article is saying:

    ‘Ladies always want to fuck you and will turn to putty in your hands if you blatantly insult them for no fucking reason!! They won’t be able to keep their manicured fingers off of your huge, pulsing dick!! Insults a a ginormous turn on for ladies. So ALWAYS use them when you see a girl with a skirt on!!’

  • This article is PRECISELY like the term ‘friendzone’, the idea that if a girl turns your request to stick your weird-ass man parts in her after doing her a kind favor makes her an uppity bitch.

    When to use negs to pick up girls: The 30th of February, at 3:61 ‘o clock.

    In fact, using these negs too much- no, at ALL -will probably get you a kick in the nuts and a black eye.

    Degrading comments aren’t arousing or handsome to ladies. What is handsome is when a guy treats his girlfriend like a normal human being, unlike, ahem ahem, this article does.

    Ladies reserve the right 57 ways till Tuesday to turn down a guy that wants to have babies with her.

    Adieu, misogynistic trash-bag.

    *flips the article writer off, smashes his computer and throws a table out the window*

  • Them: “Did your shirt shrink in the laundry?”
    Me: No. It’s a belly shirt. (not that I’d ever wear one)

    Them: “Your roots are showing.”
    Me: I don’t dye my hair so that isn’t even possible.

    Them: “Your nose is a little red. You’re like an Eskimo. Cool.”
    Me: Yeah, I can get pretty bad allergies.

    Them: “You know, you look just like my little sister. Weird.”
    Me: (Seriously who the fuck says that as a pickup line. Or ever for that matter. Creepy)

    Them: “You know, I like that outfit you’ve got on… but I don’t know… your shoes don’t really match. You should have gone with tan boots…”
    Me: (ooohh fashionable man. or gay. Hmmm…)

    Them: “Hey… you look like that cartoon character… yeah that’s right, Rainbow Brite remember her?”
    Me: Actually no. Deprived childhood.

    Them: “I like your eyes. Hey… are you wearing colored contacts??? (before she can answer) Oh my god, no way, you are…”
    Me: Uh no, I’m not actually.

    Them: “You know, your body language is all closed off. It makes you look like one of those newborns I saw on the discovery channel when they came out of the womb – all curled up.”
    Me: Well that’s one way to put it. (why was he watching a birth…)

    Them: “Hey, you’re a goof.”
    Me: Tell me something I don’t know.

    Them: “Hey girl! You have some lint in your hair… look at that.”
    Me: Oh. Thanks. [proceeds to pat hair]

    But really. If someone told me I had lint in my hair, I’d treat it as a friendly gesture. Not an advance. If you say any of these things, which I consider friendly, I will put you down as a friend in the beginning.
    Oh no! Did I put you in the friend zone? I’m sorry. Why don’t you bitch about how much girls go for assholes and unknowingly be one while I lose respect for you and you become less than a friend. You’re not in the friend zone any more. You just went into the “you’re not a human I want to associate with ever again.”
    I agree there are girls have sex with assholes. My best friend is one of them. But guess what. She has sex with nice guys. Unthinkable huh? Maybe, since you never try to actually go beyond a so called “friend” (who only thinks that being nice earns you sex) you don’t earn it.
    I have put a guy friend in the friend zone. You know what he did? Acted like an ADULT. He recognized I did not want his advances and backed off. We geek out about video games and comic books together with no hard feelings.
    Is it possible for males and females to get along without wanting to kill each other? Yes. Does it happen? Not very often.

  • Oh, this can’t be real. Nobody’s this stupid right? RIGHT? Come on guys, you don’t actually consider this stuff do you? It’s a bunch of horse shit. Oh yeah, girls totally love feeling like shit. All the time. We crave it. Fucking genius. Please tell me no one is this stupid.

  • HAHAHA no. Jesus no. What a stupid idea.

    Here’s a tip from a 10.

    a) You obviously don’t know anything about girls
    b) If a guy can’t handle a girl not being interested in him, maybe he shouldn’t go to night clubs because a few seconds of rejection from a girl is not the soul crushing thing you claim it to be.
    c) negging is a thing douchebags do and is just a huge warning sign to every girl avoid you

    I’d say more, but I think everyone else has covered it all quite neatly. I expect you to ignore it though, people who honestly believe negging are very deluded and not worth any woman’s time.

  • I consider myself to be very nice. I work as a cashier and have to interact with between 50 and 150 people a day. Some of them are young attractive men. Some of them are old awkward creepy men. I give them all the same respect and courtesy as I would any young woman or old lady in the store. I guarantee at least once a week, someone will be blatantly rude about the stupidest thing, and I will apologize even when it’s not my fault and remedy it.
    Same thing goes for clubs. On the rare occasions I go out, I would gently decline any unwanted advances. If they insist I’d simply apologize, and leave.

  • Do we really have to look for approval from men? Or anyone for that matter? Especially people who probably only want to have a one night stand? If I think a guy doesn’t like me, I’d back off. Disinterest has never worked on me.

  • Oh my fucking God!

    So I read both the site and the entirety of the comments page and I must say that this while thing made me laugh!

    This site is full of idiots who feel that their concepts of society need defending. It has given me almost hours of entertainment to read your comments!

    Anyways, the only bit of advice I can give that has definitely worked for me in the past is to be yourself, not the fucking asshole this site is trying to encourage you to be. Anyways, I’m sure my comment will quickly be erased, so on that note, I say motherfucking toodles!

  • I think negging may work on women, at least women like me. if a guy in a bar did something like that to me, I probably would feel bad and want his attention. hell, I’d probably even go home with him, undress him, bend him over, and fuck him in the ass with my strap on

  • hey, I hope your dick falls off and you never feel the touch of a woman again!

    am I doing it right? am I negging you? do you wanna fuck me now?

  • I am laughing so fucking hard at this.

    Seriously this is the biggest load of crap I have ever read. I hope all of you that are defending “negging” drown in your own vomit, you sniveling fucks.

    And if you think men have a harder time at clubs approaching women HAH JUST…. I cant even get over this shit wow. Is this because you’ve been turned down by a “looker” so many times? I wonder why… how many idiots like you try to make a move on the “gorgeous and lovely” ones? How much do they have to put up with?…and if they do turn you down they are automatically “stuck up”, “snob” or a “bitch”? Wow awesome.

    And “friend zoning”? Go fuck yourself.

    I am physically sickened by this whole article, and most of this site in fact.

    To the Author, fuck you. You are not a woman, how dare you even speak on their behalf. You know nothing about how women feel as a whole, and what they have to deal with on a daily basis or what they have done in their past. And if you are trying to justify this as using it for just the “pretty girls, daddies girls, etc.” That is even more sick, and I feel horrible that they would have to endure this shit from such pigs so often.

    You say it is harmless and not demeaning, but the mindset that I see in so many of these comments and your article, and how you try to justify it as okay…. it is not okay, not okay in the least.

    • Sure, sweetheart. We drown in our own vomit. After we turn the lights on, and find out how ugly your mum really was. You were probably born on the I-75. That’s where accidents happen.

  • Honestly, if you’re a dude and think that by subtly insulting a chick, she’s going to want to sleep with you, you’re dumb as hell. Have fun getting drinks dumped on you at bars, you weird little creep.

    • @Michelle
      You’re really full of it, aren’t you? There are “chicks” writing comments on this vapid article, chicks who go to bars and have experience with assholes (as well as men who know the difference between their penises and their brains) on this forum — as well as everyone in between, who can just see the stupidity by reading through it. Maybe you should go meet some real women.

  • This has got to be the worst advice ever. “Negging” is just a sugar-coated version of being an asshole. I can guarantee you won’t get the girl by insulting her in any sort of fashion. This article is stupid and demeaning. I wish it never existed.

    • Right, because girls just HATE guys that aren’t constantly flattering them. Come to think of it, I’ve never seen a single girl choose to be with a confident, dominant, guy. I mean what kind of girl would want that? Get out of your feminist bubble, and realize how the world works. Maybe take an anthropology class?

    • @Michelle
      Why yes, there are women (GASP, real women? Like, not in cages or televisions or playtime pretend??) who actually choose to sleep with or have a meaningful relationship with someone (in this instance, a man) because that person is kind and gentle and good. For instance, my mum knew she wanted to be with my dad because he made her laugh. She’d just left a gorgeous guy because he was incredibly cruel to her. My mother is a woman of discerning character, and she brought out the best in my dad, too. Twenty six years later, they are still kind and good to each other every day, complimenting each other and compromising with each other and communicating with each other. He would punch anyone who insulted my mom, and he would /never/ do so himself (especially not in front of others, that’s so demeaning). The way they act it’s almost (the horror!) like they’re two real people. I know, I know, it boggles the mind. I can hardly believe it myself.
      Hey, how about YOU take some anthropology classes, figure out how culture can marginalize and dehumanize a segment of the population based on arbitrary measurements like skin tone or cleavage? How about, do some reading on the Pirahã, who have this custom, when a man cheats on his wife she holds his head in her lap and beats his face with a stick until he’s apologized enough for her liking. (“Don’t Sleep There Are Snakes” by Everett) Did you know there are contemporary matriarchal societies? Say it ain’t so. Did you know that there is a global history of women being actively oppressed by cultures such as ours? And apologists such as you?

  • this article is shit and i hope your horrible tactics get you in a lot of trouble someday soon

    nobody gives a shit about how painful rejection is for you whiners

  • Coming from a girl who has been negged before, I can tell you that this does not work. In the very slightest. Any guy that comes up to me to tell me I have lint in my hair or any other shit you’ve suggested is instantly labeled “weird” and a jerk and I want nothing else to do with him from that point on. (With the exception of someone just trying to help youout, of course) Because, seriously, how can you say those kinds of things to a complete stranger and expect her to want to try and impress you after that? Now she’s just uncomfortable and wants to get away, and you’ve completely screwed up any chance you had with this woman.

    • Tl;dr: This girl thinks that her opinions and turn-ons are EVERY girl’s opinions and turn-ons. Feminism at its finest. Oh, and that the guys she IS attracted to never use this tactic. LOL

  • But we’re not scared of being “negged”. Just making that clear. That is not the problem here. The problem is your attitude about all this. That you feel entitled to lower a womans “social value” because you find her beautiful. She’s too beautiful for you, so you have to make her feel like she isn’t. Do you even know how difficult it is for women to appreciate their own face and body? That woman you’re “negging” probably doesn’t even think she’s that beautiful, and then you come along with your male privilege showing her that you as a man has greater value than her and she shouldn’t feel special.

    To be honest, this article was just annoying, just bullshit and I was gonna move on and forget about. But then I read that update and I realize that you’re not just some dickhead being a dick telling other people how to be a dick, no it’s even worse than that. You don’t get that you’re a dick. You are a sick, sick man, and you don’t seem to know simple right from wrong. You actually defend and encourage this behavior, and you try to be nice by saying that us uglier girls wont be victims of this sort of treatment. Well.. guess what.. IT’S STILL INCREDIBLY OFFENSIVE.

    So much nice guy entitlement in this article it makes me want to throw up.

  • I am absolutely appalled by this. Like, don’t get me wrong, I know shit like this happens, but you’re so damn brazen about it, and you believe so whole heartedly that it’s fine, that what you are doing is acceptable. I feel sad that society has allowed this to happen, allowed you to think that it is ok to manipulate people. Worse-that you feel it is your right to do so. Women are not the enemy. If you think they are beautiful, tell them they are beautiful. Or you could do something really drastic and talk to them, find out if you have stuff in common, find out if there is anything behind their exterior that you find attractive, and allow her time to get to know you too. Form a relationship based on equality rather than power games. Stop destroying people’s self esteem. People blame the photoshopped magazines but it’s got jack shit to do with that, it’s mean like you. And in response to your ‘update’ people aren’t offended because they are women, they are offended because they are human beings and your behavior is offensive, end of.

  • I will say in my experience negs have worked but I stopped using them long ago. Belittling and demeaning someone is a horrible thing to do and I was an asshole for doing it.
    Women deserve respect and if you guys claiming to be nice guys were actually nice guys, you’d treat women with respect and not try and manipulate and trick them.
    Misogyny is never okay and us guys need to stand up and say that everyone deserves equality and stop peddling this macho bullshit.
    I read a comment once on something that said “People who think men and women are opposites remind me of when you’re a kid and you think cats are the opposite to dogs”. If you like a girl, treat her like you wish people to treat you.
    Imagine if someone came over to you and went to you “Haha your shirt is really… eh it’s nice” in a club. My reaction would be to feel really paranoid for ages. I wouldn’t chase that girl. She’d just have made a part of my night awkward and perhaps ruined part of my enjoyment of a good night out.
    By the way, I’m a feminist and I’m a guy. The only thing you need to be to be a feminist is to believe in equal rights for women.

    • “The only thing you need to be to be a feminist is to believe in equal rights for women.” Haha this made me laugh so hard how about equal writes for humanity? Men not dragged and raped through the divorce courts?

  • This is the funniest thing I have ever read. “You look like a new born baby I saw on the discovery channel….” Yeah man I’m sure that one works every time!

    Look fliteratiosly teasing someone is okay. It’s about being playful. And funny. No ones going to respond well to random and uncalled for insults. To think “pretty girls” will suddenly like you bc you’re no longer being “the nice guy “….DELUSIONAL

  • A man who uses negging is the type of man who would commit rape. I’m not saying ANY man who uses the technique WILL rape one day. I’m saying it’s this type of person that will do it: a man with a mindset that says women need to be subjugated, that men should go to any means (no matter how morally wrong) to get what they want, that any woman you choose inherently OWES you something because you can be a nice person soometimes. That is the type of man who would rape a woman. Encouraging negging is encouraging the type of behaviour that can lead to much, much worse crimes against human kind.

  • “Hey girl! You have some lint in your hair… look at that.”
    The author knows very well that that is not the type of hurtful personal attack he was advocating in the main article.
    As soon as you got some backlash, you tried to weasel your way out of it by simpering “No! You’ve got it all wrong! I was saying guys you should tell her that she has fluff in her hair!” Don’t even try to PRETEND that that is what you were talking about. And don’t you dare then belittle women by accusing them of being offended by the “lint” line which you hadn’t even written in the main article.
    (If you ARE acually advocating the “lint” negging line, you are even more stupid than your article suggests. How is it going to make a hot girl desperate for your attention?)

  • I already knew about negging, and thought it was ridiculous. But it’s the “Author Update” I find most offensive here.
    Negging is bad. I’m not saying I have any respect for guys who use the technique, but the ones who admit that they KNOW it’s bullying obviously know the different between right and wrong and that girls SHOULDN’T be treated this way (even if they choose to do so in clubs). However the author of this article is such a disgusting human being that he feels there are excuses that make this offensive behaviour acceptable. It’s not just about him being sexist and encouraging stupid men to treat women badly – he obviously doesn’t know that bullying is wrong, no matter whether it’s on the playground or in a club.

    • A man who uses negging is the type of man who would commit rape. I’m not saying ANY man who uses the technique WILL rape one day. I’m saying it’s this type of person that will do it: a man with a mindset that says women need to be subjugated, that men should go to any means (no matter how morally wrong) to get what they want, that any woman you choose inherently OWES you something because you can be a nice person soometimes. That is the type of man who would rape a woman. Encouraging negging is encouraging the type of behaviour that can lead to much, much worse crimes against human kind.

  • You, and everyone else who negs, are a fucking piece of shit who deserves to be forever alone. Learn from people like Dan, the commenter above me. Jesus fucking Christ.

  • the amount of “nice guy” syndrome here is disgusting.
    First of all, the fact that this stupid ass article rates women’s social status on her looks is wrong and pathetic. And guess what. Amazingly enough, hot girls are people too. Shocking I know. Just woah take a sec to let that sink in before I add another zinger. Hot girls, any girls, ARE NOT OBLIGATED TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOU. WOW holy shit. She is such a bitch if she turns you down or doesn’t feel like being hit on. What a WHORE, right? Wrong, ass captains. Wrong. Even when a girl is at a club, that doesn’t mean she wants to hook up. And no. Just because she does take interest in a guy and isn’t taking interest in you, doesn’t mean he’s probably a jerk. It means she’s interested in someone who isn’t so pathetic as someone trying to “neg” a chick to get some action. I have a smoking hot girlfriend and guess what I got her because I treated her like a real fucking person without using stupid mind games (wtf right?) and there was mutual interest.
    Chicks aren’t required to be into you. And if they usually aren’t it’s probably you, dude! Not them!
    Club scene or not get some fucking balls, girls probably don’t like you because you’re a shit person who does shitty things and will never get laid because you’re excrement. You’re not a “nice guy”, You’re shit.
    Seriously, things like this is what make my sex look so damn awful I wanna like put out a world wide apology to all women ever and ask them to please not give up on us even though so many of us are shit.
    Come on guys get it together. For fucking real.

    • wow man thank you. for real, because the amount of men that dont understand that women are just people and not rubik’s cubes is frightening.

    • Your a mangina! Wonder why you see all these were have all the nice guys gone articles?

      Ans : sick of being used and treated with disdain for being nice and called manipulative AS a final insult!! Only to watch girls hook up with douchebags,then when they hit their thirties desperately look around for Mr.nice to settle down with and provide for them? Uh huh yeah they sound like “the manipulators”

  • This is disturbing. If you want to pursue a woman why not be yourself, a nice person? As a young woman, if anyone came up to me and started basically insulting me to damage my ego, in order for me to chase them to ‘get it back’, well, congratulations I’d punch you in the god damn face. You don’t treat a woman like this, no woman should treat a man like this either. You want to know how to truly get a girl’s undivided attention, you talk to her. Simple. Become their friend, be there for them, like you would your male friends, we’re not aliens. Just strike up conversation, we have interests that don’t need these deceiving plots to get inside our minds to trick us into emotional manipulation. These kinds of techniques are what make people insecure and scared of intimacy.

  • Wow, I thought this was going to be about Neopets. But here’s an article basically telling women that they owe men attention. You know what, I’m really glad that I’m overweight sometimes, because I don’t have to deal with some guy thinking that tearing me down using snide comments will make me like him. Also, I got the pleasure of having a partner who actually likes me for me and not because I’m a “8, 9, or 10.” Not everyone is an attention seeker. Some people just want to spend time with their friends. They don’t want other people salivating over them all the time. Also, don’t pull the stupid “YOU WIGGLE YOUR NOSE WHEN YOU TALK IT’S ADORABLE” thing on me, because that’s the only positive one you put on there…in an edit. I’m proud of who I am, I’m proud of what makes me special despite a “physical flaw” of being fat. Maybe if you would value women as more than walking vaginas and thus approach them with simply the intent to get to know them and be actual friends, you wouldn’t be doomed to “the friend zone.” Everyone has some kind of insecurity, so wouldn’t it be the same for an attractive woman? I’ve noticed that your site mainly concerns itself with the idea that the perfect woman is super hot and super sexual…why wasn’t the first part “she’ll be your friend and companion.” Also, it stated that she should share your interests, but what about hers? There’s very little respect for the woman as an individual and all about the benefits she will provide for you. Frankly, that’s pretty insulting. I don’t want anyone commanding, anyone who will give me multiple orgasms. I don’t want to be manipulated into liking someone because of their body language or anything like that. I want someone I can share a decent conversation with, someone who is going to love me despite my flaws and for them, and someone who I can be intimate with (not just sexual.) I have all of that and my attention was not garnered through some scheme to take away someone’s unknown ego-status.

  • Reading this made me nauseous. How about treating a woman, no matter how she looks with some respect and instead of saying you’re a ‘nice guy’, trying actually being a nice person. Also, who cares if rejection is ‘crushing’, women are rejected just as much as men are and, you know what? If a woman does not give you the time of day, respect her decision and get over it. If you were really a ‘nice guy’ you wouldn’t make a big fucking deal about it. Women don’t go out for the sole purpose of finding a guy to bring home. If you’re shot down instead of being all butthurt maybe think about how she went out to meet a friend or with friends, how she might have other things to do, or hell, maybe she’s just not attracted to you. Women don’t owe you anything!

    It is never EVER okay to manipulate and degrade someone, be it a man or a woman, no matter how attractive you may or may not find them. And, you know what? If you’re the type of person who would do this sort of thing, pissing off and making people feel worthless, then good luck with all that rejection you’ll receive.

  • @Jesse Charger
    I’m curious, how many successes have you had using this technique? If you wouldn’t mind answering.

  • “You know, I like that outfit you’ve got on… but I don’t know… your shoes don’t really match. You should have gone with tan boots…”

    Yeah? How ’bout I stab you with my stiletto heel then?

  • Actually? I didn’t realize we were using playground methods to get girls now… the whole, “He’s pulling your hair that means he likes you” thing gets old after a while. How about treating everyone as an individual and assessing how to flirt once you get talking to people instead of assuming based on appearances that a girl or guy is a certain way?

  • It’s not just women who miss the concept of being equal and fair with people, it’s men too. Basically what I’m saying is that everyone should be treated equally, not just “oh the pretty girl rejected me because I was not on her level.” lot of pretty girls are jerks, and so are “pretty” men. A lot of what one would consider a pretty person really deep down do not have that high self-esteem, but rather, feed off of whatever attention they can get negative or positive, even if that means getting attention by humiliating someone else. Sometimes, sorry, you’re just not liked, you might be a jerk, you might also not be someones type, but to be treated like a subclass of human being, that’s wrong for anyone to do. If you’re not liked, sure someone should tell you politely that they’re uncomfortable with you. The person who was shunned should not get angry but rather consider there truly is a reason they are disliked, not keep trying and harass the person into liking you. That is also not the point of negs. I think perhaps you should write an equal article about how “ugly” women can talk to “cute” boys who “seem” like douchebags for rejecting them/bullying/harassing them. Or perhaps an article about how women can “neg” men to get them interested in them. You see, not all “pretty girls” have the same mentality. I can understand the Daddy’s Spoiled Little Brat Bitch though. I just think fair should be fair. Everyone should be treated equally, and most people have not gotten that through their heads yet.

  • But the thing is no should have to be nice to you, or go home with you or even talk to you, boy or girl. If you’re genuinely a ‘nice guy’ you would respect the fact that someone simply isn’t interested.
    I don’t want to get too deep into the subject, but it looks as if the majority of you boys feel personally victimized by ‘hot girls’ and therefore it’s okay to poke fun at them- though it sounds more like bullying- so that they know what its like to be ignored or shunned. Or maybe it really is so you can get into a really hot girl’s pants? Either way it’s a dumb move and this type of persistence and inconsideration is unhealthy and idk ya’ll seem like the type to jack of to porn w/ really, really submissive girls tbh

  • In reality you are either going to 1: sound gay and she’s not going to be interested or 2: piss her off and she’s not going to be interested OR 3: weird her out and she’s not going to be interested. Trust me. I’ve had this done to me before and it doesn’t work. Any guy who believes this really is pathetic. “Negging” a girl (or as we humans like to call it, insulting) really just makes a girl uncomfortable and will likely make her want to walk away from you as fast as she can.
    Plus: “Hey girl! You’ve got some lint in your hair look at that!” is literally something my gay best friend has said to me before. Ten dollars the man writing this article is gay or in the closet.

  • This is why we all hated middle school. Negging just shows everyone else that you’re about 13 years old, and the only chicks this works on are at least emotionally 13 years old as well. Good luck…

  • “Alpha” males are just about the unsexiest thing I can think of. The last thing I need when I get home from a hard day of work is some vanilla-featured thick-necked bro who wants to compare muscles and pretend he runs things.

    By all means, though, neg away. Reinforce my first impression of you as a complete dolt. Just bear in mind that I’m still going home with the willowy guy with long hair and glasses. And if you want to take that up with him…he’s under MY protection, and you will have already made me angry.

    • “your” protection? What are you, a butch lesbian? He’s in all probability your gay boyfriend. Please. Spare us the b.s. I haven’t had this much fun in a long time. You’re wallowing in filth, dipshits. The long haired willowy guy with glasses? You sound like a nun with a nerd fetish. (forgive me, god) We don’t compare muscles, silly. Ah, that’s enough. You girls are so cute.

  • My god, you people are boring. Let me be boring with you!

    I googled negging after XKCD brought it up. That led me here.

    And then I start reading comments for all the feminist bullshit and all of the fat woman jokes. Every article like this has great comments to catch up on the great sexism debate.

    But I’m feeling argumentative. So….

    Negging is not a new idea. And it certainly works on the women it caters to; either chicks with low self-esteem (who should probably stay in the kitchen), or with chicks who like to banter and trade insults.

    That second chick is kind of hot, but she’s probably wise to how you adopted it from a cheap get-bitches-quick article and find a more amusing asshole.

    You though, Mr. Charger… You’re kind of an arrogant prick.

    ‘Oh, I have such great social status and I have scoring spoiled rich hot chicks down to a formula!’ (and all hotties are spoiled rich chicks, everyone knows that)

    ‘Oh, and every woman everywhere wants a manly grunting pig who will call her mean names and love her long time. It shows that the pig can multitask!’

    ‘But really, I’m a nice guy. I just have to be a stupid chump obsessed with my own social status (that is clearly so superior to every woman’s) and she’ll like me.’

    ‘Aha! If I insult her a little at the start, she’ll see I don’t care about her looks. That means my social standing will be greater than hers. And she’ll want me to care about her because everyone else does.’

    ‘That way, the chick will want my dick in her mouth! And she’ll feel super confident because I gave her the time of day to let her put it there! I am a great and upstanding person! Yaaay!’

    Misogyny and misandry aside, you sound like a twat.
    But that’s your own personal problem.

    The point here, is that it works, it has always worked, and it works regardless of what superfluous stupid little number you attach to their tits. So long as it caters to the right kind of woman.

    It’s not morally wrong. It’s dull. Cliche. Kind of in poor taste.
    But there’s no gender-evil either way.

    1.Guys are usually assholes.
    2.Chicks are usually bitches.

    3.The ‘Nice Guy Syndrome’ is an easy cop-out for every guy (and sometimes girl) that doesn’t want to accept that there might be other factors in why that bitch/asshole doesn’t want your meat.

    Woohoo! The three great truths have been revealed!

    People are boring.

  • It’s like this whole page is just a “negging” demonstration. At first I read this and thought “holy shit, men are terrible” then I remembered that this is just the internet, home of the biggest losers on the planet and felt instant relief.

    Good grief. You people are stupid.

  • Maybe the women at the clubs who don’t give you the time of day are there to hang out with their friends and don’t want to be interrupted by someone who inserts themselves into the conversation, gets immediately touchy-feely, and insists that you leave or ignore your friends in order to talk to/dance with/fuck them instead. I go out to the clubs maybe three times a year and I’m there with my friends to have fun hanging out and dancing with them. I’m not there to pick up guys or be picked up by guys. I’m especially not there to be picked up by guys who are rude and pushy and invasive. I don’t consider myself to be particularly attractive or unattractive, but I get my share of attention when I’m out at the club with friends and it’s frustrating to have men pawing at me and then throwing bitch fits worthy of a three year old when I don’t succumb to them and leave my friends. Negging just seems to fall into this same type of category of rudeness and pushiness.

  • It’s not the ‘negging’ that is offensive, it’s your views on what an ‘alpha male’ is. You are absolutely disgraceful to all man kind. My husband chased the hell out of me. He was not a challenge to me. He has never been a challenge. We both have type A personalities and if he or any one else ‘negged’ me or called me a bitch while he ‘loved me right’ I’d cut him at the knees. I’m sure your therapist thanks you for lining his pockets.

  • Zeroflash, second part of your message made sense though. I have a friend who falls only for that kind of guy who rejects her because she wants challenge but she’s not too smart.. she hangs out with lots of guys with money. I don’t wanna be mean but I see this and keep telling her it attracts bad people. I don’t think she’s ever gonna change… But she’s still my friend. It’s sad! I guess it’s because of girls like her that nice guys try to act rude. 🙁

  • Oh and by the way, EVERY MAN SHOULD READ THIS HERE. if you find a girl attractive at the nightclub, it doesn’t necessarily means that she’s a skank! (see post above from zero flash) Maybe she’s just there to dance and have a good time with her girlfriends. So if she’s busy dancing or talking with them, DON’T GO AND DISTURB HER! OF COURSE YOU’RE GONNA GET REJECTED! Unless she’s literally staring at you then save your ego and let it be. She might not respond well, especially when there’s 10 other drunk guys who tried to hit on her before you. So wake up guys! A girl at a nightclub doesn’t immediately means she’s looking for a man, especially the type that goes out to nightclubs (BECAUSE SORRY BUT NO MEN GO THERE TO DANCE WITH HIS BUDDIES) so from all the girls out there who like to go out with their girlfriends , LEAVE US ALONE!! We are not interested in men like you and stop insisting because you’re just gonna end up looking like a complete idiot.

    Ps: zeroflash, you really don’t know what you’re taking about 😉 what if a girl is posting here after being revolted that a man was using this technique on her (which would mean that she’s hot because they say to try the technique on hot girls only). I’m not talking about myself but anyways lol , looks like men know nothing about women !

    -good guys, stay good 🙂 u will get what you deserve one day!!

  • The way you make it sound it’s a really good idea. Honestly.
    However, I think most guys trying this are actual dumb douchebags using it on every female they see. Therefore, fuck this system, I hate it.

  • So funny that too many men are so insecure that they have to bring down a girl because like that she ” can’t ” reject them. Grow some balls or Keep on negging, insecure assholes! You know in the end, she still rejected you 😉

  • Woww I just hate men like that. The kind that is always saying something mean because theyre scared you reject them first so they try to make you feel like they rejected you. Too bad many girls are so stupid that they need challenge but I don’t get what’s so fun about it. If I want a guy, I want him to want me the same and want ME only. I like getting all his attention! What’s the point of wanting someone who is not interested in you?? Biggest turn off!! Nahhhh.. Stupid technique here! Plus, you will only get stupid girls. Try looking for pretty AND smart instead 😉 if you’re being a nice guy and she’s a nice girl, then she’ll end up with you!

  • That “negging” thing sounds logic, but aside of it not being a nice thing to do, it seems to me that is a technique to get laid just once.

    Women will just try to reassure their ego and hitting the sack with a guy who rejected them is (or should be) more than enough.

    It’s all about them, they use you to boost their self confidence. (or so they think, you were using their low self esteem to get them on the first place)

    I prefer the Brodsky “domination” method, you don’t have to insult anybody and women not only keep coming back, they actually want to please you and do it happily, a win win situation, unlike this “negging” technique.

    I won’t even try “negging”, not because I don’t believe it works, but because even when I’m not a white knight, I’m still not a total asshole.

  • Idc who or what you are this is misogyny. Generalizing “pretty” women, the article even says ‘those glamorous girls’ or whatever. It’s about judging women based on predetermined factors that do not necessarily exist, and then justifying it by claiming you’re the victim. Just FYI, my sons’ kindergarten classmates do this. So unless you regularly piss yourself and cry helplessly, you don’t have a very good excuse to be this ignorant. I’m leaving my gender, age, race, and sexual orientation undefined so you all hopefully see your biases.

  • “Further consider that 99.9% of guys are SO damn nervous in clubs and bars that they can’t even approach a girl without wetting their briefs.”

    Ah! Now we’re getting to finding a solution. Research shows shyness to be as high as 50% of the US population. http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200910/are-you-shy
    So if you feel shy, realize that it’s normal!

    Here are simple steps to get rid of shyness:

    (1) Stay away from people who enjoy being mean to or rejecting other people. That may include having to stay away from some family members. Find friends who are accepting and encouraging of other people.

    (2) Draw a line down the center of a page. On Side A, write all the things that you should be embarrassed to do. On side B, write all the things you’re embarrassed to do, but should not be embarrassed to do. Even atheists can do this list. One atheist said he decides what’s right and wrong by asking himself, “What would happen if everyone in the world did it?” Example: what would happen if everyone in the world was mugging other people?

    (3) Now, choose one thing from Side B and start doing it over and over as often as possible. Deliberately go out and make your self as embarrassed as possible doing that one thing. After sufficient time, you’ll desensitize yourself to it. After you’ve desensitized yourself to that one thing, choose another thing from Side B to work on. Keep going until you’ve desensitized yourself to everything on the list.

    (4) Search for clubs (not night clubs) that help their members improve their public speaking skills. I could suggest one excellent, inexpensive club. But some of your readers appear to be the type who would ruin the club if they got into it.

    (5) Read books and online as much as you can about shyness and introversion. Learn the pros and cons, because they really do have pros and cons. Some women prefer shy guys because shy guys have a tendency to be gentlemen and have compassion for other people. You can have some very thought-provoking conversations with Introverted guys, too. Learn how other people overcame their shyness.

  • Negging…if you want to read all about it, get the book “Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and the New Realities of Girl World” by Rosalind Wiseman.
    http://rosalindwiseman.com/publications/queen-bees-and-wannabes/

    Ms. Wiseman’s original book said that the Queen Bee and Wannabe behavior started in high school. In a later edition, she notes that she changed her mind and recognized the negging starts in junior high. But read the book reviews on http://www.Amazon.com and you’ll realize girls start negging in grade school, kindergarten, and preschool.

    Ms. Wiseman doesn’t call it negging. The description is the same.

  • Negging only works on women who are naive to abusers.

    After sufficient experience with abusers, women become no longer naive to negging and other abuser techniques.

  • Heed the red flag of people who are saying there’s something morally wrong with this.

    Negging is the technique of insulting a woman so you can tear her down psychologically so you can get what you want from her.

    This (verbal abuse) is the first step woman abusers use. At first, the positive comments out-weigh the negs. Gradually as the woman becomes more psychologically beaten down, the negs increase while the positives decrease. Then, the man can start the physical abuse.

    Here are the top 10 signs of an abusive man:
    http://www.authorsden.com/visit/viewArticle.asp?id=28889
    Negging fits under #2 Control, #4 Manipulates, and #9 Disrespects women.

    • what are you talking about? Another one who didn’t even read the article but wants to flap her mouth off.

      A neg is only to be used when you FIRST MEET a girl who is very much into herself… NOT during a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.

      • But your articles still advocate for controlling, manipulating, and disrespecting women once you’re in relationships. You sell a DVD for “training” your girlfriend.

    • Oh…but I have read everything written up to this date. Negging is abusive. Just like some men use verbal abuse to keep a woman in a relationship some men use verbal abuse to start a relationship with a woman.

      Instead, try figuring out non-abusive ways to meet women and start and keep relationships with women.

    • Here are your (Jesse Chargers’) initial statements that should have shown people that negging is psychological abuse:

      “You can also lower a girl’s social value in relation to yours”

      “She’ll feel the bitter sting of being just like everyone else”

      “Everyone wants to be liked. Everyone wants approval. No one wants to be ignored…..Take that away and their whole reality crumbles”

      At the end, you (Jesse Charger) states:

      “Remember, you’re not out to damage the girl’s self confidence or put her down. You’re not out to mess up her self-esteem…..The point is to make yourself stand out as socially valuable male and a challenge, not to make her feel bad.”

      This end statement is diametrically opposed to all your previous statements.

    • what you’re not understanding is that all those statements are in relation to HOT girls. “her reality crumbles” means her reality of being ass-kissed, chased, and stared at by all the nice guys and yes-men crumbles.

      “she’ll feel the bitter sting of being like everyone else” is a HOT girl to feel like a NORMAL girl, and they LIKE IT. they get attracted to it, because for once they’ll feel NORMAL around a guy, like he’s not trying to get something from her.

      “lower her social value in relation to yours”. face is, average Joe Smoe walking into a club will NOT have the same social and sexual value as a stunner 10 girl. You’re not destroying her social value compared to anyone else, you’re just bringing her to reality so that she’ll actually talk to you and see you as someone different than all the other guys trying to kiss her ass.

      None of that contradicts my warning of “don’t make her feel bad”

      • “for once they’ll feel NORMAL around a guy, like he’s not trying to get something from her.”

        But the key thing is, he IS trying to get something from her. And he’s trying not to get “friendzoned.” So, if he’s trying to get something from her, and it’s not friendship, it’s obvious what it is.

    • Alas, guys don’t reserve negging for the 9 and 10 women.

      The 5 and 6 guys neg the 7 and 8 women.
      The 1 and 2 guys neg the 3 and 4 women.
      The 0 guys neg the 1 and 2 women.

      If a guy thinks it’s ok to neg a woman, who doesn’t want to get into a relationship him, at a bar, do you really think he won’t do the same to a woman in a different place?

  • For the guys reading through this, forget about negging. I just heard about negging from a friend.
    A couple of guys joined our club that meets once per week and started working together hitting on one woman after another. The one guy could keep women for about 2 months. The other guy drove off women in 2 or 3 weeks, although one woman lasted 4 weeks. The guys were using negging.
    I had been a long-time club member and enjoyed my many friends there. Unfortunately, the club leadership had changed over the years. We used to have leaders who believed in treating all people with respect and courtesy.
    Then, we changed from those leaders to leaders who had no respect for women. When any woman complained about the guys, the leaders disregarded anything the woman had to say. Despite having many friends in the club, I left after 5 years of miserable negging from these guys.
    There are lesbian women and celibate women (you don’t have to be Catholic to be a celibate) who don’t want to discuss their preferences. Heterosexual women realize that there will be some men who aren’t attracted to them and move on to meeting other men.
    Heterosexual men, also, need to start realizing than there will be some women who aren’t attracted to them and move on to meeting other women.
    Heterosexual men need to stop goading each other into expecting all women to swoon upon seeing him, need to stop goading each other into feeling ashamed if a woman isn’t attracted to him. That goading is so 10-year-oldish! Men, if you have friends who try goading you, you need to find new friends. Keep looking. There are men who are psychologically mature who will make great friends. Mature men are attractive to mature women.

  • “It’s THAT kind of girl that negs are designed to attract.”

    Why the heck to do you want to attract THAT kind of girl.

  • Lol I stumbled across this article when I came across the term negging in an article in cosmo haha. I just wanted to say this author is assuming a lot of things about all women that just aren’t true. Like when he says”every guy you have ever fallen for has made you chase him.” And that is just not true. When I first met my boyfriend, I liked how he immediatley showed interest in me. Making eye contact across the room and smiling, I met him in a group enviornment and when I first walked in he offered his chair to me which immediatley made my heart flutter cause it made him seem like a gentlemen, and also I like when guys give me clues that they like me, cause honestly, not tying to be vain, but my entire life I’ve been called pretty, but with my looks came shyness. I like when a guy let’s me know he’s interested and does the chasing because I am much to shy to do it, it would be out of my comfort zone to chase him, and it just makes me feel special. After everyone sat down and got the group going he started making a few jokes that made me laugh which instantly attracted me because it showed me he had a good sense of humor and could cheer me up. Also it helped that we liked the same things and had a lot in common. If the girl you like brings up something you are interested in or know about, use this as an excuse to talk to her. She will love that you guys share interests. I brought up politics and the state that our countrys in during the meeting and it turns out he was interested in politics as well and had a bunch of cool documenteries and books he downloaded on his computer about the subject, and told me he could email them to me. I gladly said yes and gave him my email. In the email he sent me he gave me his number incase I wanted to do something. I took him up on the offer and sent him a text, and we stayed up all night talking and watching movies. We are still together to this day and very much in love:) anyways, the point of my post was to give advice. And examples from my experience on what attracted me to my boyfriend initially, and help guys who are struggling to get a girl so they could get some advice on how to get girls from an actual girl. Confidence, kindness, and a good sense of humor will take you so much farther than going out of your way to say something to her to make her feel bad. If someone was being mean to me I would try to avoid them, not embrace them. Common sense tells you this. Women aren’t complicated creatures, we are just like you, we just wanna love and be loved.

    • Drea, you are obviously a nice kind heartened person. Transparency is what this world needs and would that it could be true of all women and men but it just isn’t. Sadly there are some women who believe that every guy is up their a$$(often they are hot, but sometimes aren’t and not all hot chicks are like this), and these tactics are meant for them. Its okay those women are bad, these tactics are basically manipulation of psychology which is also bad, and the dudes who use them maybe bad, but hey “three lefts make a right”.

  • I looked negging on google because I came upon the term in a Ricky Gervais podcast. Up until I read this article I was unfamiliar with it.

    Ultimately this really is silly. Being GENUINELY playful and engaging will get a response but walking up to a woman and trying to play something between Hugh Hefner, an autistic prepubescent and Freud won’t work. The average internet desperado who would try this would fail miserably because you can’t fake charisma.

    As for all the guys here complaining about being “too nice”, way to out yourselves as complete narcissists. You’re an asshole meathead in a geeky body, sorry.

    • “As for all the guys here complaining about being “too nice”, way to out yourselves as complete narcissists”. Dude, You hit the nail on the with that comment. It’s exactly this type of selfproclaimed “nice guys” who get’s rejected, not men who are genuinely nice.

  • Serously? SERIOUSLY?

    What is this, the ’50s?

    I hope that as many women as possible read this so they’ll know what they’re dealing with the next time they get “negged” at the bar.

  • LOL, thanks for the info!

    One of my law school buddies recently told me in front of our friends that I should “go to a gym and get hotter.” I was a bit startled that he would insult me like that in a public setting, especially since he hits on me pretty frequently, until one of the bystanders later explained that I had just been “negged.”

    Unlike some of the other women who posted responses on here, I am not at all displeased that this technique is being promulgated. By all means, let these sort of guys remove themselves from consideration early on. It makes it much easier for me if a man shows his mean/manipulative/insecure streak early on.

    In my experience, great guys (and great people in general) make others feel great, too. That’s why others enjoy their company and seek them out. Anyone incapable of banter without resorting to personal comments isn’t very clever.

    And, FYI, any guy who makes a negative comment about my appearance, personality, or character when I meet him will never see me naked, I promise you.

    Good luck in your woman-hunting!

    • Your friend confused naked insults with negs… NOT the same thing. It’s very amateurish.

      If you go to a restaurant, and the cook orders you an undercooked hamburger, does that make all hamburgers bad, and you would rail against all hamburgers?

      Any guy that mistakes negs for insults, that just leaves more girls for all the other guys.

    • J,

      I never thought about it like that… So I encourage all the men who believe negging to be a good tactic for picking up “lovable, hot, women who know all the tricks of the trade.” Eliminate yourselves from my potential suitors.

    • You know what? You have a point. The men who take up this behaviour – just keep doing it so normal people can see you for what you are.

  • I love how the people for this are all self-righteous when they are called trolls and the like, then automatically assume everyone against this is an ugly woman. You people are pretty skilled to be able to tell that from a web page comment.
    Signed,
    Must-be-a-fatchick (news to me….)

  • Well…Then you get the ass-hats that try this on a generally nice girl who may be average looking…or…they take it to far and get a drink dumped on them…Ahem…personal experience there…

  • So being rejected is ‘much worse’ treatment to receive than being insulted so that a girl will feel more receptive to a guy’s advancements?! Bad news, pal, it is our RIGHT to reject you. Sorry. If a girl isn’t giving you ten seconds to tell her your name, guess what? SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO. She’s under no obligation to hear any person’s offer – being at a bar doesn’t mean she’s looking for a date. I fail to see how that is ‘much worse’ than putting a girl down in front of her friends to lower her ‘social value’ – which is really just an attack on her confidence, no matter what kind of jargon you try to wrap it in.

    The fact is, the message that you are suggesting that guys send to girls is “You’re not as great as you think you are so you have no right to reject me.” And that’s sick. Absolutely, completely sick.

  • Wow, a few of you girls getting so worked up about lines like, “Your nose wiggles when you talk… that’s so cute!”

    You’d think the sky was falling. 😆

    And yet you have no problem name calling me “Troll”, “Retarded”, and “Crazy”… I’d say far, far worse than any of the negs I listed in the post.

    Way to go – you know how to keep it classy.

    • “Your nose wiggles when you talk… that’s so cute!”
      That isn’t a neg. Someone’s nose wiggling isn’t an insult.
      The other things on this list, however, are way more insulting. Or if you said “your nose is big, so i can really see it wiggle when you talk… that’s so cute!” that’s a neg. And it’s insulting.

      Funny how you know exactly which neg is the least offensive, and use that to defend yourself.

      I really want someone to neg you. Maybe with “Aww, look, you keep looking at my cleavage! It’s like you’re ten years old and in elementary school again!” or “I like your pants, they completely hide any possible existence of a penis.” or maybe even “drinking away a wasted life, huh? Yeah, I can see why.”

  • Misogyny in action ladies and gentlemen (and I use gentlemen deliberately. Any man who uses or supports the of “negging” is not included.)

    Girls let’s make it clear:
    YOU BETTER BE FUCKABLE AND GORGEOUS. If you aren’t you are a grenade and you deserve to be ignored. You should be grateful if a dude even fucking notices you. SO YOU BETTER BE GORGEOUS *AND* AVAILABLE.

    Good. Now that you are within the “fuckable” range of beauty, prepare to be insulted and abused. Because who do you think you are to think you might not find this man attractive? HOW DARE YOU NOT WANT HIS SEXUAL ATTENTION?

    Maybe you are a lesbian. Maybe you just want a night out with friends without some asshat hitting on you. Maybe you are actually afraid of being approached by strange men.

    WELL TOO FUCKING BAD!
    AS A WOMAN IT IS YOUR JOB TO BE FUCKABLE, BEAUTIFUL AND AVAILABLE.

    And if you aren’t all three of those, you will get punished. Negging is just punishment for women who are “fuckable” and beautiful but NOT INTERESTED.

    And if you are fuckable, beautiful, AND available? God what a whore.

    Congrats on being a misogynistic prick Charger.
    I would say you’ve risen above the rank and file, but you are so low you’re barely humanoid.

    • Sure, negging works – on people with abysmal self esteem (and you’re absolutely wrong. Looks are NOT a factor in response to this douchebag technique; anyone can have a shitty self-image). So if you don’t mind girls who are doormats, then knock yourself out, I guess. Just know that confident girls can smell this bullshit a mile away.

      Oh and the whole “this only works on really hot girls” is just the cherry on the shit sundae. You can defend yourself until you turn blue, broseph, and it doesn’t change the fact that this is still misogynistic as fuck. You are not entitled to a vagina. Actually, you aren’t entitled to shit. No one is.

      • Yo, haha wow: don’t bring a knife to a gunfight, motherfucker. This shit is the real deal. As men, we are entitled to certain things, as are women. By “confident”, you probably mean ugly or overweight. You been tested for mad cow disease? You’re practically frothing at the udders.

    • Another ugly chick pissed over something imaginary in her head that has never happened to her.

      Hot girls get this. It’s part of the playful attraction dance.

      • I’ve been negged before and am currently being negged by someone online (“you are hot. sucks ass you probably fuck the ugliest guys.”) it’s not a playful attraction dance. It’s a “are you bipolar? you’re telling me I’m not worth it and then saying “but if you were to be interested in me, I might stoop to your level” – why would I even be interested in you?

        So yes. It’s happened to me before. It happens to me pretty frequently. And – unless the person KNOWS me, and knows me well enough that they can tease me WITHOUT seeming like a dick – it doesn’t work.

    • Haha, Rob. It’s easy to say that the person making the comment is ugly based on the fact that they don’t agree with your opinion. I agree with haha wow. Men have “negged” on me before, and every time they do… it just shows me that they’re juvenile and don’t have enough confidence or manners to talk to a person properly.

  • I had a close female friend of mine who was a model and got “negged” (insulted), all the time. When we were in high-school, so called “Nice guys” would come up and say things like this to her, almost everyday. Than she was the “frigid bitch” when she insulted them back. Listen to me, these, even used playfully, are insulting. Do you really want a girl to come up to you and insult you, about your hair or the way you dress or talk or whatever and then laugh like they just lightened the fucking mood? It doesn’t. I, replay those kind of comments over and over in my head, and they truly upset me and others. Especially, my close girlfriend, since so many guys thought she was untouchable, they apparently thought negging was good way to bring her down a rung, put them on her level or whatever. In truth, these “nice guys” fail to understand, beautiful women (or any woman, for that matter) are not machines that if you put enough niceness in sex/a relationship falls out. Women are, I know this is apparently very hard to believe, are human beings with feelings that get hurt and tastes, which means, yes, some women will not be attracted to you no matter what! I know, I have met men I could only see as friends and would never be more than that with, and I know there are women that my guy-friends have met that they would not want to have a relationship.

    • I go to nightclubs where I do the bartenders and bouncers and any guy who “negs” me or my friends, especially more than once, gets the boot.

      Guys: any girl who suddenly becomes interested in you because you cut her up as your pick-up line is going to be A CRAZY PERSON. You do not want to go there.

    • HA, I meant I *know* the bouncers. But, yeah, that was also a Freudian slip.: bouncers usually are nice guys and worth “knowing” — because they see lame ass jerks pull this negging crap all the time and they know it doesn’t work on anyone old enough to get into a nightclub.

  • I could go on and on about how you think hot girls consider their looks everything, or how if they don’t get attention from men they flail like a fish out of water, and that these insults, which they are, are just for fun.

    But I wont, because it’s not worth it, none of you will listen.

    Are you telling me that a not-so-hot-girl could approach a guy and do the same thing? This is a very sexist post and one of the reasons I am a lesbian. If a girl isn’t interested, a girl isn’t interested. You can’t get into every girls pants so deal with it. You don’t own the right to her vagina, and using this technique wont make a difference, if you do this it’s most likely going to just have her slap you, or walk away.

    Tell her that she has nice hair. Say something witty, a cool joke, do an ice breaker. Those things work. This? This is bullshit and anyone who uses it should be ashamed of themselves. Girls go through degrading insults and words and speeches every day of their life from the media and they don;t need some guy in the club doing it too.

    • You’re insulting the lesbians with your comment. Homosexuality is not a choice. This only shows that you’re in your puberty years an you’re exploring your sexuality… Normally, you don’t need excuses to be homo or hetero!

  • Is this article for real? Do you really, honestly think that this type of behaviour is going to get you laid? And I find your comments on the fact that only the women commentors complain about the negging hilarious. ‘Oh, this is an article written by a man, ASSUMING he knows how women work and what makes them tick, and the backlash coming from WOMEN is worthless, because what do they know, right? It’s not like this freaking article is ABOUT THEM AND THEIR RESPONSE or anything.’ Seriously, do you not see how absurd you are? If all these women are telling you ‘Dude, this doesn’t work, and frankly, you’re kind of an asshole.’, then why do you insist on trying to prove them wrong? There’s no way you’re convincing anyone. And those comments about how negging is only for gorgeous women, so we shouldn’t worry, it’s not targetted at us – I’m sorry, but how the hell do you know what we look like? How do you know what we’re like and if we fit your extremely limited view on women? And if you don’t have the confidence to walk up to a pretty girl, then maybe you shouldn’t be hitting on her. Frankly, if you’re a 5, don’t go after a 10, dude. What is up with not-particularly-good-looking-men thinking that they’re entitled to ‘that hot piece of ass’ ‘Maaaan, she’s a solid 9, I’d totally bang her!’ Chances are, no, she will not want to sleep with you. Not if you buy her a drink, not if you kiss her ass all night. Maybe not even if you’re nice, but definitely not if you’re being a fucking ashole. Stop being a self-entitled douchebag and stick with what you can manage, don’t aim for girls out of your league and then come here and complain when you get turned down. That’s the behaviour of a five-year-old. The way you phrased this article makes you sound like you’re out to take some kind of revenge on all the pretty girls who turned you down – which is pathetic and desperate. Not to mention immature. And honestly, if any woman on this planet falls for this crap you wrote here, then she deserves you and the shitty way you treat her.

      • So it’s totally fine for him to give advice about how it doesn’t matter how ugly or old YOU are, you can find a hot young piece of lady-meat. That is what he’s advocating, after all. I mean, everyone seems to agree that the only people this could possibly stand a chance of working for is hot guys, and that’s only “working” in that she doesn’t immediately reject him. For a guy like you, Rob, I think you need to adjust your expectations. I’ve seen you “working out.” You’re not such a looker yourself.

    • +1 I agreed with the self-entitled thing. “OMGZ I CAN’T GET A HOT GIRLFRIEND ALL GIRLS ARE BITCHES EVEN IF SOME ARE AS SHALLOW AS I AM”
      Wanna get a girl? All you need is a sense of humor. Doesn’t matter what you look like. One of my ex’s was not the most handsome guy, but he won me with a sense of humor and kindness, and for that I loved him and all his flaws. He was sweet from the get-go, and that’s what caught my attention. People made rude comments to him about me being “out of his league” (whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean), but these are the same guys who are single and horny all the time, wondering why their asshole-attitudes only give them about 1 halfway decent one-night stand from some random homely looking girl about once a year.
      Don’t take the cheap route, guys. You’re better than that. A woman who’s worth being with and wants to be with you will respond to positive, not negative, energy.

    • Right off the bat, this was a great quote:
      “Just to be clear, there are actually girls for whom jerkiness is the first thing they’re drawn to (or rather, they’re drawn to other factors that tend to come packaged with jerkitude). But for a lot of them, this is because they’ve grown up being mistreated or abused, so trying to take advantage of that makes you a dick.”

  • So I realize that this technique is actually written in dating guides for men, but I don’t think it would work overall–I know it wouldn’t work on me. You say it’s for pretty girls who’ve gotten everything from daddy all their lives…how do you know that when you’re approaching a girl, first of all. You look at her and go oh she’s pretty, she must have gotten stuff handed to her all of her life because she’s pretty. Also, this actually just makes you look like an ass. The only way you’d catch the attention of any girl with this is if you’re really gorgeous. But if you happen to be a good looking man, you wouldn’t NEED this technique to get girls because, odds are, pretty girls are chasing you anyway.

  • If a guy can’t pick up a girl without having to drag her through the mud (to his level) then he doesn’t deserve to get laid in the first place. It’s natural selection at its finest.

  • First, I must point out that the apology regarding the offensive nature of this article misses the mark in quite a few ways

    1. “It’s often pretty CRUSHING to the guy’s self-esteem that he isn’t given 10 seconds to acknowledge he’s another human being to talk to and say “hello”.”

    This seems to demonstrate a lot of aggression on the negging perpetrator. A woman doesn’t respond to attempts to “pick her up” (perhaps she isn’t interested, perhaps she’s in a relationship, perhaps she just wants a night out with friends). Because the one-negging feel dehumanized, the one-negging feels the need to reciprocate tenfold? How dare she not treat the one-negging like a human being, so now, rather than being the responsible adult, he feels the need to perpetuate this cycle of distrust, hurt, and subsequent aggression?

    2. So don’t worry, it’s statistically unlikely to ever happen to you, even if you DO look like a runway model.

    You know, I’m not really the kind of person who likes to step aside and allow harmful stereotypes and expectations of BOTH genders to fester and create really awful environments. It shouldn’t be a matter of whether or not this happens to me. It should be a matter that, as respectable human beings, we should all be in support of treating people like respectable human beings.

    3. A lot of this hinders around the assumption of being owed attention. “This woman won’t talk to me… How dare she?”

    I am not blaming men for this attitude. Both women and men are raised in a culture that teaches that women are a prize, something that the protagonist always wins. We all see ourselves as the protagonist of our own stories– and being denied the attention of something we want is taken as a personal insult, because we feel we are OWED the prize we’ve been promised.

    Let’s not perpetuate the cycle. Women are often wary of men in a public setting, in large part because of hearing things like this. Women are told that if some asshole guy does something to them, that it will be their fault. So, many women have guards up. Men will often taken offense to this, because they feel their desires are not being met or considered. The cycle continues, this shitstorm propagates itself.

    I think people need to recognize that a desire for someone does not equate necessary satisfaction of that desire. Yes, it’s okay to be bummed (you SHOULD be bummed) but the danger comes in when we refuse to recognize that the other person is an autonomous being with a decision making agent. We ignore that, to get what we want, and that’s dehumanizing in itself.

    The problem I see with the whole concept of negging is that it largely enforces the idea of being owed a woman and being owed sex with her simply for being an all around decent fellow, and you don’t murder people, and you hold doors for old ladies at the grocery store, so why the hell shouldn’t women want you?

    Being a “Kim Kardashian” type is not an excuse to push your own desires ahead of another person’s autonomy. It is not respectful. It is not useful to anyone’s interests.

    And therein lies the problem with this concept– and indeed, with this article.

    As respectable human beings with a decent grasp of right and wrong, we should all recognize the inherent flaws within this cycle of attitudes and work to squash it, not perpetuate it.

  • This is terrible. Even with your afterword, this is not okay. This is saying “Hey, want to get into a woman’s pants? DISRESPECT HER. INSULT HER.” This can not be compared with ignoring a man at a nightclub. If a girl wants to ignore a man at a night club, she is welcome to do that. We have a right to not be interested in a man. We are not an object here for your pleasure.

    More than one in six women in the United States will be raped in their lifetime. Less than 3% of rapists ever go to jail. I hear about men CASUALLY raping women in night clubs. How can you blame a woman for not wanting to talk to a man, anyways?

    • So if a guys says to you, “Your nose wiggles when you talk,” because he’s attracted to you, you would take this as an insult? With a stick up your ass like that, good luck ever catching a cool guy.

    • Rob,

      This is the exact attitude women are not interested in, or at least no self respecting one is. You seem fairly hostile that someone would not respond positively to your “neg hit.” Perhaps this is also the problem. I don’t think I will be looking in your direction to “catch a cool guy.”

  • OK… hot chick here. Not supermodel hot, but I have done some modeling, and I do have to turn down at 3 (misguided) men a day. Here are some quick tips.

    1: All this is bullshit. Women never react positively to negativity. Hot chicks, the kind this article seems to be aimed towards, are CONSTANTLY offered favors, free shit, sex with hot guys, etc. Why the FUCK would you choose someone who’s being a dick over someone who’s handing you free alcohol? Would you do that? No? Neither would a woman.

    2: There is about 1/3 of 1 chromosome difference between men and women. The easiest way to get a woman to like you is to engage in a conversation with her and show that you’re listening. Restate the things she says as if it were the first line in an essay test. This shows that you are not a douchebag, and will get her to lower her guard.

    3: Be very careful that while doing this, you instigate a lot of touching. Brush up against her arm or move her hair out of her face. If she doesn’t recoil, you’re on the right track. This shows that while compassionate, you are trying to get laid, rather then stuck in the dreaded “friend zone”. This is VERY IMPORTANT. If you don’t flirt physically, she might not pick up on it.

    4: And that’s really it. If you go to any sociology or psychology site, like APA.org or Psychinfo.edu, you’ll see that there work because they’re backed up with 30+ years of research. If they don’t, then you’re simply barking up the wrong tree. Drop it and move on. If you want to do an empirical test, then try the tips this site has given you, watch as you get a drink thrown in your face, then try mine and watch as you get laid.

    BTW, being told that you look like Rainbow Brite might work, especially on a rave girl, because Rainbow Brite is hot. I’m not sure anyone would consider that an insult. And, I’m pretty sure that the folk who set this site up are getting a cheap laugh at your failure. I wouldn’t give them the satisfaction, myself.

  • Lol, this was hilarious. Especially the part where you complain about women saying it was bad advice. So SO much projecting. This is way too serious to be a troll, sadly. Your update has shown once and for all you have no idea how women work (hint: its no different to men). *snorts* oh man… the bit where you try to equate it to high school bullying, as if you actually understand how teenage girls act… and the bit where you complain that women only date assholes? You’re a walking cliche. I change my mind, you must be a troll. No one embodies the down trodden “nice guy” more perfectly.

    Here’s a better idea. Don’t try to be something you’re not. If you are acting, how on earth will you ever be comfortable around women? Treat people the way you want to be treated, and look for women who you have something in common with. If you ever want a real relationship you’ll look for a woman who can be your best friend as well.

    • Wow, pretty bitter about the whole thing aren’t we?

      You can hee and haw about it all you want (as you posted no less than 7 comments calling me a ‘troll’… way to go backing up your opinions by getting dirty and throwing mud), but it doesn’t change the fact the guys use negs because they work. This has been field-tested extensively. It’s just fact. What do you want me to do about it, tell everyone little white lies to make you feel better?

      Sorry that the world doesn’t march to your fantasy of how you wish it to be.

      And hurling insults at the messenger doesn’t change the facts about what works.

      • To be very blatant for all the feminists, and beta boys reading this: negs work. End of story. You got triple digit lays? No? Then why in the name of heaven are you commenting? Lose your virginity idiots, then start with the opinions. Jesse, you da man.

    • @Jesse: What the jesus mother-effing fuck!? Like seriously, fuck you and the Charger you rode in on( get it? a charger is a horse in case you missed the pun). YES WE’RE BITTER, ASSHOLE!

      “guys use negs because they work” Goddammit that is not the fucking point! And if they do, that makes me very sad for those women because they probably have self-esteem issues or have been brainwashed by our misogynistic patriarchy into feeling like they’re supposed to go along with it. Women, believe it or not, are NOT an ends to a means, the means being a relationship or sex. If that’s what you think makes you complete in life, then holy fuck, that is a sad sad sad perspective on life, LOVE, and people. Turns out women are also people.

      What’s pathetic is that you seem to think that the only way for “nice guys” to get laid with “hot girls,” ’cause obviously that’s what’s important, is to “neg” them so you can be on par with the rest of the assholes. You are further revealing how the whole “nice guy” complex is just an asshole of a different color.

      What do I want you to do about it? How bout you stop telling guys how to be assholes to women for their own selfish sexual gains? What if you didn’t perpetuate a view on women that objectifies their existence for the sake of their bodies? Confirmation-bias is a horrible thing and the more shit like this that misinformed people read, the less likely they will learn to become better human beings and the more likely they will spread the misinformation and degradation. Stop adding to the problem. You want “hot girls” to stop dating assholes? Don’t teach more guys to be assholes and maybe if less guys were demeaning assholes to women, women wouldn’t grow up in a society or environment that told them that that’s how it is and supposed to be.

      So there you have it. This is a portion of why everybody’s pissed off. Yeah, I know me yelling at you and saying “fuck you” as much as I can isn’t a great persuasive device, but damnit if it doesn’t satiate my righteous anger.

      P.S. You’re an embarrassment to the rest of us men who believe in women’s equality and wish you guys aren’t how they viewed the rest of us.

    • @The Truth
      Heh, it’s funny, defending ourselves from misogynistic and demeaning articles is apparently “misandry”. Also, nice, the way you topped that off with an insult evaluating a lady you’ve never met on what you assume she looks like. Good job showing how women hate men.
      Grow up.

    • The funny part is they’ll never realise what they’re doing wrong, and thus never learn. They will become bitter and “blame the wimins” for rejecting them, as you can see in the hilarious update.

  • “And ANY guy you’ve ever fallen for, on some level, you had to chase HIM. Every single guy you ever had a crush on made YOU chase HIM.”

    “Pretty girls IGNORE ‘nice guys’.
    Pretty girls at least RESPOND to ass-holes.
    The ‘nice guy’ over in the corner who is ‘very nice’ gets the ‘let’s just be friends’ treatment.”

    This sounds like a classic case of Nice Guy syndrome to me. Being nice to girls simply in order to get laid and then getting angry that you don’t is just…invalid. I’m gonna give you an applicable quote. “Friendzoning is bullshit because girls are not machines you put kindness coins into until sex falls out.”
    So, no, being nice to a girl will not always get her to be attracted to you. The simple fact is, some girls will not ever be attracted to you. It’s not necessarily because she’s standoffish, a bitch, spoiled because she’s been pretty her whole life, or along those lines. You could try acting like a mature human being and recognize that ladies are equal human beings with their own emotions and ideas, and then the fact that some of them don’t want to have sex with you might not be so unbearable.
    Not all girls like guys who treat them like shit. Saying anything along those lines is a gross generalization, and maybe it’s this disgustingly sohpomoric mindset that’s led you to have to resort to this kind of behaviour.
    You do not know what every woman wants. Women are all different people, not carbon-copied brains put into different bodies.
    Personally speaking, “negging” is not something that would make me more attracted to someone. First of all, it’s obvious as shit, which just makes you look 1. awkward, 2. desperate, and 3. fake.
    People who are honest and genuine are attractive to me. People with sexist mindsets who use mysoginistic advice in some attempt to get with me are the furthest thing from attractive.
    Accept that some girls don’t want to have sex with you, because I guarantee you there are others who do.
    And for the record, every boyfriend I’ve ever had and been extremely attracted to has not made me chase them, and the really meaningful relationships I’ve had have been exclusively with “nice guys”. I do not respond to assholes; I ignore them and walk away. Arrogance and general douchebaggery are complete turn-offs; I don’t like it and certainly will not respond to it.
    Relationships and sex are not one-way streets, they are mutual give-and-take.
    Anyways, if a girl is not willing to be with you unless you say stupid and mildly offensive things to her, she probably has many underlying emotional issues and is not really worth pursuing something with at that time. If you’re looking for a one night stand, maybe that doesn’t matter (though even in that situation, I’d still reject someone for implementing this advice), but this advice seems to be nonspecific to that situation with your comments quoted above.

    To recap, not all girls are the same, friendzoning is bullshit, and you’re awfully sexist.

    • Tell me, how is life going with your 60 cats? Don’t be angry that guys want to chase pretty girls over you.

      • lol – Bitter, Nick? It doesn’t change the fact that she’s right. Especially about looking “1. awkward, 2. desperate, and 3. fake.”

    • Do you realise you totally contradicted yourself in this essay write-up you call a comment?
      ”Some girls will never be attracted to you”? I take it you’re still a teenager(early 20’s tops) and so haven’t grown past liking people by their looks or ‘acts’.

    • careyexboy, “some girls will never be attracted to you” is not a shallow or irrational thing to say. No man, no matter how smooth his “game”, will achieve a 100% success rate with females.

      • So, tell us about your overweight boyfriend. Being himself, is he? You must be loving your Krispy kremes.

    • Thank you! Seriously, I was negged so much in high school to the point where I believed all that shit. People would say things like “Hey babe, has anyone ever told you you’d be so sexy if you weren’t so fat?” (I’m exactly 100 pounds by the way) I was harassed like this all the time and then these guys had the nerve to spank me and ask me to be their prom date. I had to drop out of school and was soon diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and my doctors would warn my mother about me being on the verge of developing an eating disorder. I still have to take pills and get a shit ton of treatment because of all these guys negging me. Now do you think it’s worthless douchebags?

  • I read all the comments so far…
    I have only 1 question in my head right now , ” WTF?”

    You dont have to use neg’s all the time! You just use it 1-2 times. Neg’s have improven my game ever sience i discovered them. And asking women opinion is pointless. They will always tell that it’s rude and so on…
    Pointless to argue with them. Only thing matters is that we know it’s working.

    • Freak:
      Women’s opinions are totally pointless.
      They just always complain and argue, omg.
      It couldn’t be because you’re wrong, and an asshole.
      No. Certainly not.

  • I see a lot of ppl here not knowing the difference between “there” and “their”…. how do you pretend to pick up a girl if u don’t even know how to fucking write??

    • I haven’t seen any spelling mistakes on here of ‘there’ and ‘their’

      Besides, people have been having sex and attracting for thousands of years, way before the written word. That a man (or a woman) has to be a spelling-B nerd when he’s jotting off a quick comment – and that has anything related to attracting the opposite sex – makes no sense.

      It’s pretty cool when I get other opinions and disagreements from my own. But this was just plain dumb.

  • Negging = random douchebaggery. What woman wants some random dude walking up to her and making some unsolicited comment about her appearance? Only the dumb ones, which seems to be what you’re after. Congratulations, you’ve proved the stereotype that men only want easy sex from stupid girls.

    • Amen. Perhaps women would stop rejecting you, when you’re no longer shallow and puerile. There are plenty of attractive, nice women willing to give decent guys a chance. The fact that you have to come up with some gimmick confirms the fact that emotionally, many of you have never left high school.

  • Haha it’s so funny how the “pickup artist” still thinks this works despite all the negative responses from women he’s getting!

    Why can’t a guy just be confident in himself instead of relying on bringing her down “if she’s super hot and you’ve just met her”? Don’t use a fucking “neg or two on her.” Fucking talk to her like anyone else would and good lord if you’re an interesting person that she’s attracted to, maybe she’ll agree to a date.

    Man this article says that negs aren’t out to put girls down but that’s essentially what it is – put-downs and masked insults in order to make up for a guy’s lack of self confidence.

    Any putdown, no matter how pretty it looks, is an asshole move to use to “pick up women.”

    Know what I hate? Shallow guys with no confidence.

    Get a life! Stop manipulating people and start treating them like human beings.

    • Jane, thanks for your input.

      But actually LOOK at the negs… they’re said PLAYFULLY with a smile and they’re clearly not “insults”.

      “Your nose is a little red. You’re like an Eskimo. Cool.”

      “You know, you look just like my little sister. Weird.”

    • @Jesse Charger
      You are a self-deluded asshole.
      1) You do not know which “harmless joke” will hit a woman smack-dab in her deepest insecurity. You want women walking around, chuckling over how “skinny your little arms are, it’s adorable” or how the zits on your cute face make them think of their little brothers? Or do you want them walking up to your friends and saying, “does he ever shut up?”
      2) The way into a girl’s heart is not by comparing them to your little sister. That is creepy. That’s pretty gross on several levels.

    • What women say they want and actually want are two different things.they state their preference for nice guys but are attracted to bad boys.the front part of their brain tells them nice guys the hindbrain says a bad boys all the comments here are coming from their front brain. But in actual reality theyd chase some guy who did subtly neg them

  • Cool tip to get girls to like you:
    talk to them like a person instead of a challenge
    get to know them
    point out interests you have in common
    be willing to explore new things

    Man, so difficult.

  • Not to say that this might not work, but…why would you NEED this? …Seriously, if you’re so sure she’s “out of your league…” work on yourself. Then she won’t be, and hey, you’ll suck less in the process.
    eg: I’m a goddamn 6′ 3″ biochemist with no kids that does cycling marathons and grows orchids. *No woman* is out of my league. (Disclaimer: I’m not rich and a drive a practical car that gets good gas mileage. These are fine: I’m not out for gold diggers, and neither should you be.)

    • Good comment Newt. Yep, it’s not recommended to be used on most girls, and completely optional to throw in at all. You don’t need negs to get girls. Something to play with only if it suits you, and girls will respond.

  • Wow, what a load of crap. Assuming “hot” girls must have really high self esteem and need to be crushed before you can approach them is just sad. In my experience pretty girls are just as insecure as everyone else, so why insult them? Being a nice person and treating women like human beings can really work wonders, you don’t have to put us down.

    • @Jesse Charger
      You tried okay
      but failed
      abysmally
      this will never work
      ever
      no matter what the intent is it’s still rude and belittling and nobody wants to be treated like that

    • You know, critics let us know about ourselves, but they specially let us know the feelings of the person who made them!

    • That comic brought me here too.
      This whole article is absolutely disgusting, the mere idea behind the book is too.
      Whoever actually tries this and keeps trying – I hope you will realize how wrong it is one day, and I hope you DO manage to work through your issues (despite what the comic shows). Either way, just stopping being an ass and actually using your head for more that various ways of undermining others to make yourself feel better is a step forward.
      How about being decent human beings?

  • I had a guy do this to me because he thought I was playing hard to get and I’m genuinely a really nice person but I eventually shouted at him in front of his friends and walked off.

    One of his friends, who was also my friend, came up to me afterwards and apologised on his behalf after explaining everything.

    I’d advise ALL guys who want to get a nice girl NOT to pull this.

    • Anna, he did it wrong then. Negs are to be used very sparingly and used PLAYFULLY, and only on really closed-off women that only ever get positive attention from men. They’re meant to give a woman that’s always being chased that opportunity to need to chase the man’s approval – which feels exhilarating to a woman who has never felt she needed to chase a man before and only seen it in the movies. Your friend may have done neg after neg in a serious manner. This is a common mistake. But it doesn’t invalidate their effectiveness when used in the proper place and proper manner.

    • @JesseCharger
      It feels “exhilarating” to a woman? How the FUCK do you know what feels exhilarating to a woman? The entire concept of “negging” is misguided and frankly, makes anyone who would attempt to use this or even anyone who thinks this would work look like an enormous asshole. It’s not ok to berate women to get what you want. It’s not ok to berate ANYONE EVER. NO MATTER FUCKING WHAT.

      Here’s a thought: women, don’t be shitty to men, and men, don’t be shitty to women! What a lot of problems that would solve.

      Honestly, this “negging” thing sickens me to the core, not to mention the blatant “pretty” bias and the encouragement of a male-defined feminine beauty standard. Is it not enough that men berate women to get sex? Must they also define who is pretty, or thin, or “hot”, or “fuckable” or whatever qualifier you choose to use?

      All of this is bullshit. Women do not need men in their lives in order to feel “whole” or whatever other bullshit excuse you need to come up with in order to justify why you NEED a woman’s attention. Men do not need women in their lives in order to feel “whole” either, and the same “bullshit excuse” thing goes for women, too. Relationships are a gift, cultivated by mutual respect and affection. NO PERSON OWES YOU ANYTHING. So don’t be sexist assholes.

  • Okay okay…. I hope this reaches as many of you as possible (before it gets deleted). The ideas above were cooked up by a group of guys who had there egos severely damaged through high school and college and the article was just written by some guy who wanted to make a quick dollar.

    It may be fun to get back at girls and show them you dont need them but thats all this really is. Its not horrible but it doesnt help much with “get girls”. Im not even sure that there overall goal with these is to become closer to any girl. However, if your goal isnt to get with girls than this stuff will provide for some good entertainment.

    Im not gonna say they totally dont work but im letting you guys know that this isnt really going to help you. Im guessing that if you landed on this page you either are trying to win over a girl in your class or be a better conversationalist during the day. These tactics are definitely not for that. These were meant for the high energy club environment and even then you get what you want.

    Im thinking you want girls to like you or to get that one girl to give you the time of day. My advise is to use common sense. Actually look inside and put yourself in there shoes and ask how you would be feeling in her situation. That should shed some light on how you would like to treat women in the future. Also it doesnt hurt to through in a little courage.

    • Wow. To all the people thinking this guy is never gonna get laid, PLEASE REALIZE THAT HE’S RIGHT. Women don’t ever enjoy being put down, and that’s what negging is no matter how you look at it. I’m a model, so I know what being pretty feels like, and guess what? Pretty girls don’t like assholes.

    • Pretty girls IGNORE “nice guys”.

      Pretty girls at least RESPOND to ass-holes.

      The “nice guy” over in the corner who is “very nice” gets the “let’s just be friends” treatment.

      Negging works. Girls may not like it in the moment they hear the neg, but they’re reacting and responding.

      Tension and attraction are very similarly related.

    • Dude, girls don’t like self proclaimed “nice guys” because they aren’t actually nice. They are the “assholes” whom they themselves despite. If you pretend to be a lady’s friend to get into her pants, you are not being nice. Women don’t want “assholes” OR “nice guys”, they want real people. Trying to sort men into those two categories just makes you look silly and bitter, but mostly it makes it look like you have no experience with women (though its probably not the case).

    • Shan, typical feminist hate-speech rhetoric. Peddle your propaganda elsewhere, you’ve been exposed here.

    • The Truth… what an unfitting name. You are proof that there are people who still haven’t evolved from the “Hit woman in head with club and drag to cave” era.

    • This strategy is pathetic and makes me sick. If any guy tries this on me, I immediately delete him out of my life. I have no time for sick mind games. It comes down to this:

      I don’t want to sleep with you, get over it and go away.

      • You must be very average looking to get ignored so badly. Nope, we don’t wanna sleep with you either. You probably got your cats for that.

    • @Jesse Charger
      Wow, what a great point, pal. You may be right. Girls WON’T ever go for nice guys. They’ll have their pretty heads up their asses forever and think life is fucking cupcakes and sunshine until they die of old age, having been the most beautiful and sexually active woman ever.
      Just like how guys only ever consider the incredibly hot girls, don’t give that second glance to the average-looking girl, huh?
      Just like how NEITHER sex eventually grows up, lowers their standards within reasonable parameters and actively searches for a life partner instead of a quick fuck.
      Every guy who thinks this works needs a reality check. Acting like a tool until you find the absolute 10 you’re looking for is ridiculous. and sure, a girl will give you a reaction if you treat her like garbage. She also won’t give you a second glance ever again when her initial impression of you is that, at the first sign of not getting what you want, you turn mean and unreasonable.
      Good luck with that, guys.

    • It makes me sad this comment is getting so much flak. Apparently the only way to get women is to make them feel bad about themselves so you can take advantage of their low self-esteem.

      Pro-tip for all the self-proclaimed “nice guys” in this thread: there’s a reason those women aren’t swooning over you. You have no confidence in yourself, so why should she have confidence in you? I still have no idea where this “all women date assholes” nonsense comes from. I’ve never dated anyone who fit that description, nor have I met anyone that has.

    • I have been on a date with a guy who did a form of this ‘negging.’ I just felt very uncomfortable and confused the whole night, and it wasn’t worth my time or attention. I could tell he had the potential to be funny and clever, but he just kept making stupid jokes at my expense — very much like the examples in this asinine article. I didn’t answer any of the calls and texts that followed; it sure as hell doesn’t work.

    • @the truth. A woman argues that men are “real people” and you call it feminist hate speech? Uhh..seems like the opposite.

    • This has to be the dumbest, most sexist thing I’ve ever heard. What about insulting someone is attractive? Yeah, maybe one quick comment to get her attention, but if you think being an ass is going to get you a girl, then I’m sorry to say that you’re one of the virgins here.

    • Every single guy who uses this technique on girls or is commenting here is the reason I hate men. If anyone ever tries this shit on me, don’t be surprised when you get a nice kick in the ballsack. You are the reason girls are starving themselves to feel like they’re valued in society. You won’t attract anyone this way, all you’ll do is give them a mental illness and make them hate themselves. Is that really what you want in a girl?

    • Okay. Woah. Not because I think you have any right not to be insulted but because you won’t listen otherwise, let me put this in the simplest possible terms, presuming that you are as far from a feminist as it is possible to be and will remain that way.

      It is not okay to socially beat-down anyone.
      It is not okay to talk about someone in the third person in their presence with the intent of making them feel worse in any context.
      It is not okay to interfere with someone’s self esteem (which this inarguabley does) because of their appearance, gender or how you think their daddy may have treated them.

      If a girl is only interested in you because you insulted her, then she probably has self esteem problems, which you have just made worse. Because you think she’s hot.

      If you want ANYONE to like you, you treat them like a human being. If they don’t like you after that, then you oughtn’t like them, though that in itself is not an excuse to treat them unkindly.

      Your sexual/romantic interest in someone is not an excuse to treat them poorly.

    • If I was single, I’d date the crap out of you.
      To dickfaces putting this person down: Let’s talk about “nice guys” who need Negging to Get The Girl (Girl meaning a super model since average looking girls are not worth all this effort.) Guys so “nice” girls just ignore ’em and go for the capital-a Assholes (aka anyone who isn’t you). Guys so “nice” they get friendzoned. Guys so nice they need to subtly manipulate and insult people who intimidate them with good looks and the possibility (not even the actuality of it, just the very chance) that you may get rejected.
      Yes let’s talk about how nice ya’ll are, thinking a woman saying “no i don’t want to talk to you” means “oh she’s being a bitch” or “lol playing hard to get” rather than “no i actually don’t fucking want to talk to you.”
      Let’s talk about how you’re so “nice” that women should be obligated to talk to you, but are such cunts that you need to forsake your sworn oath of “niceness” to get what you deserve.
      Discuss.