Fantasy rape and ravishment is a very common sexual fantasy with women.
About one in two women, half of all women, openly report to having fantasies about heavily forced sex and about one in three women report having imagined, “I’m a slave who must obey a man’s every wish.”
Over 10% of women report that being forced to have sex is their favorite sexual fantasy.
The rape fantasy does vary on the spectrum from being violently raped by a powerful stranger who treats her with utter indifference on the one end, to being taken by a familiar or past lover who is so in lust with her that he just can’t hold himself back and he ravishes her.
Women who fantasize the victim role imagine being forced into sexual situations against their will. They’re sexually excited at the idea of being completely controlled and dominated.
In a rape fantasy, sex has nothing to do with tender feelings, love, or sensitivity. Sex has nothing to do with whispering sweet nothings, eagerness to please, concern about whether she’s climaxed or not. The man is rough, dominant, and insensitive.
Remember though, that just because a woman has fantasies about being raped, it doesn’t mean she literally wants to be raped in real life.
The rape fantasy reflects the desire, not to be raped, but to be irresistibly attractive, so attractive that the man can’t resist, and to be passive, to avoid any responsibly for the sex. Being raped in fantasy is a convenient way of getting past the big NO to sex that had been imprinted on a woman’s mind since early childhood.
In a rape fantasy, a woman can freely enjoy sexual pleasure without feeling guilty or inhibited. Because she is “done to” by the rapist or insatiable man, she doesn’t have to feel any shame about being wantonly sexually responsive, about being a slut who really enjoys it. That he ravishes her so deeply the whore deep down comes out and she can have no-holds barred dirty passionate sex. Forced sex takes all the responsibility off her shoulders.
In the ravished role, the man in her fantasy is so insatiable for her, so in lust for her, that he can’t resist, and once he has her, he can’t get enough of her. In almost a savage lust he sweeps her off her feet, carries her off to the bed, and ravages and has his way with her.
It’s an affair of pure pleasure, an exciting brush with danger. It remains an abiding female fantasy to meet a man who gives totally of himself, who lives for her, even if only for a single night of passion.
In the ravished role, the fantasy is more of a “friendly rape”. Usually it’s with a man she already knows or even loves, with a connection that feels special, even spiritual. Rather than violent forced sex, it’s really more akin to forceful, passionate lovemaking.
The following are real women’s rape and ravishment fantasies from the Nancy Friday book series.
One woman writes,
“I have been taken captive by pirates on this ship. The ship is the old kind with huge billowing sails and wood-plank floors that smell of wet cedar. The pirates are all old and nasty looking with ragged clothes and a couple of days’ growth of beard. They smell of musky sweat and whisky.
There’s a big storm brewing, and the ship is starting to creak and rock from the wind and the waves. I’m tied up on the dock against one of the poles by my hands, and my legs are left free. I have a long blue dress on, with a very low bustline, and my tits are just about to fall out. My skirt has been ripped up to my waist, and my petticoats have been carelessly discarded to the side of me in a heap.
The dirty old pirates have formed a circle around me and the pole. Their eyes are gleaming, and they crudely lick their lips as they decide who’s going to have the privilege of going first. They finally decide, and the pirate who’s first is kind of fat and drooling with anticipation. He gets on his knees and crawls toward me. Slowly, he pulls my skirt to one side and starts sniffing up my thighs to my muff. His wet tongue slowly licks my outer lips. I can clearly hear him whiffing my erotic pussy fragrance. Then he slides his tongue into the fold of my lips, just licking ever so slowly. This takes my breath away. Then he darts his tongue into my pussy hole. I’m wondering how a maiden like me could possibly respond to such a thing!
All of a sudden he changes his mouth to where he has my long inner lips in his mouth and is sucking them and my twitching clit with a steady, tugging rhythm. Every now and then he’ll flick back to my hole. By this time in my fantasy, and sometimes actually, I’ve already had an orgasm.”
Another writes,
“I awaken in a strange and lavish room where a Hispanic or black man sits across the room in an unbuttoned shirt, with a drink in his hand and a cigarette hanging carelessly from his lips. I realize I am on a bed in a red gown. I see that he is an infamous and powerful drug lord. Drowsily, I ask, “Why am I here?” He answers, “You’re mine now. When I see something I want, I just take it.”
As he strides casually toward me, cigarette in mouth, drink in hand, I spit in his face and call him a bastard or son of a bitch. He laughs confidently, setting aside his drink and cigarette. He grabs the front of my gown and pulls me to my feet, kissing me fervently. I struggle, but his effortless embrace holds me. He throws me to the bed and undresses himself. He pins my arms to the bed, still kissing, nibbling my face and neck. I whimper, and he chuckles. “I am going to teach you, because I know you want this.” He inserts his fingers into my cunt and then his tongue. My ability to struggle wanes. Then he fucks me slowly, as though with calculation.”
Another writes,
“All of my fantasies are about a contest of wills, where I am accustomed to winning but lose to this one man. He is always powerful, strong, and arrogant. So am I, but not quite as strong as he. I am seduced or forced, but I always want him, though I feign disgust, hatred, or indifference. A lot are “Taming of the Shrew” fantasies, where I am such a wild-tempered bitch that some guy decides to do the impossible: conquer me, make me submit to him.”
Another writes,
“He forcibly pushes me against the wall and pins my arms above my head with one hand while the other hand makes its way under my skirt and fondles my vagina. The man rips off my clothes, forces open my legs, penetrates me, and concurrently smears my lipstick all over my face with his forceful kiss.”
Being raped or ravished is the fantasy that all women have but are too embarrassed to admit to. That’s why she’ll jump for joy when you pull this one through for her.
The key is not to be much concerned for her pleasure. Women get off when a man desires her so much that he just uses her body as something to fuck and give himself pleasure. When you’re turned on and going crazy with lust, she’s turned on and going crazy with lust. Your state will automatically lead her state.
To do a ravishment be extremely commanding.
Don’t ask her what she likes.
Don’t ask her what she wants.
Just tell her what you want and don’t use a lot of words to do it. Actions speak louder than words.
Fuck her hard like you just got out of prison and she’s the first girl you’ve seen. Ravish her from the depths of your core. Lead strongly and command her in the direction you want to go.
It’s key for you to get into the right state of mind. For a woman to feel ravished, you need to be in the mental state of a ravisher. Imagine this woman is your illicit mistress and you’re going to devour her body. Image you’ve never been attracted to someone so physically and you will fuck her from the very depths of your being with intense and uninhibited lust.
Grab her by the waist and start making out with her. Lift her arms over her head. Push her up against the well. Lift her up and throw her on a piece of furniture.
It doesn’t have to happen in the bedroom. Too many couples only have sex in the bedroom. If you truly want to ravish your woman, you wouldn’t wait for the bedroom. You would take her right there in the kitchen or anywhere else.
Lick her face. Kiss her all over and hungrily grope her tits. Start off like you’re holding back your desire, like there’s a flood gate about to explode. Tell her, “I want to fuck you so bad. I can barely contain myself.”
Rip off her clothes and handle her body roughly with your hands. Treat her like a piece of meat, like her sole purpose is to get you off.
Don’t be afraid to get a little messy and leave sweat and drool all over her body. Start talking sexy to her in every manner as you devour her body.
If you catch her off guard, she may not be in the mood, but if your passion is strong enough, it can put her into the mood. As the ravisher it’s your job to be relentless, to not give up, to punch through the wall until the woman submits and surrenders to your passions.
I think the best way to rape is to be without her corporation or neither her acceptation you’re the hunter she is the prey so afford the results later. maybe you’ll win or maybe you’ll going to the prison
I can’t find a guy for the love of me that will do this! The ones that will are the ones that don’t know you who just want a one night stand and that’s not right – you need to know each other and well
I have lived this fantasy and it was the best sex of my life. I went to see an ex I’d been friends with since grade school because he kept calling me. I wanted to tell him I had met a guy I really liked and had a feeling I was falling in love. I’ll never forget his saying, “Like He**!” before forcing me into his bedroom by walking forward without stopping (physically forcing me to take steps backward without touching me), then throwing me on his bed, ripping my panties to shreds and fucking me. When I started to acquiesce because it felt so good, he softened with tenderness and kisses, and when I started to fight, he got rough. He told me over and over that he wasn’t stopping until I climaxed and against my will, I did – twice. Then, and only then, did he bury himself deep inside me and climax himself. Without any birth control, he finished by whispering in my ear, “I hope you’re pregnant now. You’ll be mine forever. I’ll call you in a few weeks to learn the happy news.”
I didn’t end up pregnant, but I did spend the next few weeks constantly thinking about him and that afternoon. I have the best sex of my life and it left me with a memory I’ll never forget. Two months later, my new guy and I became exclusive and shortly thereafter got engaged and married.
This is wild… I have been married for 22 years and just last night, THIS came out… we were going to have sex like we always do.. and for quite some time I have felt that I don’t turn her on anymore.. it seems like my touch doesn’t do it for her anymore.. well I just stopped and was pissed off and told her ” fuck it if you cant respond I dont want it”.. you see I have been having erection issues lately and I think it has to do with the fact my dick responds to how she responds, if she seems NOT in the mood my junk wont work ( lame I know but that’s how my mind works” it was then that we had a talk about how I approach sex vs how she WANTS sex.. she said it hurt her feelings that after 22yrs I didn’t know her.. I thought I did.. she explained to me that she wants to be taken and NOT played with BUT FUCKED HARD and lusty.. I was like OH Ok.. and we talked about it for a bit and all of a sudden my loins were on fire, I didn’t even have to touch my dick.. it was HARD as a ROCK, I kissed her.. threw her down,.. flipped her over… ate her pussy for a bit and then fucked her hard and fast… she screamed and said ” oh god im going to squirt” (she has done this only a couple of times, so im like DAMN).. I kept it up and again she came and then again and again.. we fucked for about 45 mins,, my dick harder than it has been in a while.. swelled up big time.. I felt like a HE-MAN.. which is EXACTLY what she wanted..I finally came in her and she just shook..and started giggling… she she turned around and said ” job well done” with a huge smile and the rest of the day she was bouncy and happy…I must say I learned something.. WE men CANNOT be wimpy in bed.. I never thought I was. I thought I was being tender and loving… They want THAT too.. BUT 99% of the time they want.. to be taken and fucked.. SO.. men if your reading this.. LOVE Your wives BUT FUCK them into submission and they will come and come again…:)
Made me wet so much…
I absolutely love this article!!! I have actually talked to my husband about this before we were married. I know a lot of women or there who are scared to talk to their men but ladies I’m tellin ya. Talk to your men i promised they are more open than you think. Ever since i spike with him we have been exploring our sexual relationship more. We even went to a toy store for more variety. It is so fun and i can’t wait to see how much better it will get. Please ladies talk to your men!!!
I come across as a strong girl who goes to church, and hold a executive position for a large corporation. BUT when it comes to the bedroom my inner-side comes out. I can’t get enough of it. I like it when he’s rough as hell, pulls my hair, bends me over and thrushes me from behind. When I scream, he tells me to be a good bitch and shut the fuck up. The more he’s aggressive the wetter I get. I like when takes complete control. I know it was especially good when I have bite marks on me the next day.
i dont think that this artical did much justice for me .. i would not use the term rape mostly because people are more concerned about making love or getting it in then rape that is just a harsh word even the the sexual stability is very amazing !(:
Jesse you’re inspirational!! Looking back every time I have dragged a girl down onto the carpet they have giggled the whole way down, tried to fight me off but were deliberately ineffectual and let me have my way with them. It didn’t seem to matter that it was all about my desire to penetrate them. They were quite respectful afterwards too.
I used to take an ex in her sleep. She’d complain afterwards but clearly respected it. Especially the first time – I will never forget the way she looked at me the first time or the delighted squeals of protest when I chased her round the room for some more.
You are very right. Girls love it. I am going to let my inner caveman out more often after reading your site. Thanks .
To the girls..who have asked how to reach their mans caveman. Well a good Yes-No-Maybe always gets me going. Don’t give him any till he takes it.
i so want all dis to happen wid…i wil go crazy if someone i meet who has the guts to hold me tight , dominately showw his passion… aah i so want such a man !
Great article and is exactly what some people need to hear. Me included. The girl I’m seeing has confided in me she wants me to dominate her, treat her like she’s my slut. We do have pretty strong sex now, I like to talk dirty and fuck hard but haven’t really unleashed. This excites me but I haven’t been a strong type A personality and have a hard communicating to her exactly what I want. If a guy hasn’t done this type of total domination before it can be a little difficult to do just jump into with total confidence or hesitation. But reading this article that is from the male and female perspectives really opened me up to what it is the guy needs to do by what the woman is actually expecting. We have to dig down to find our caveman self. Peel back the layers. But I can feel him already, thanks Jesse.
My husband and I have been in a little bit of a winter blues funk lately, and neither of us has been up to doing much of anything.
About a week ago we crossed a threshold into revealing sexual fantasies when I expressed a need for some excitement, and he finally opened up to me that he’s really wanted to try bondage and would love nothing more than to tie me up and have his way with me.
I think I will direct him to this article, because the last few paragraphs of this describe what I want to the letter.
😉 i loooove this. such a turn on. I would love to be ravished.
on a scale from ravish to rape/ 1-10 i would be a hard 6 i like rough sex, and to be ravished at the same time.
Oh, and my boyfriend is scared that he’ll hurt me, but I’m definitely not afraid of him dealing out any serious pain towards me. I don’t know how to approach this kind of fantasy. I don’t want to tell him to do this, because I don’t think I’ll find him as sexually stimulating as I’d like to, but GEEZ do I want him to just man-handle me!
Any tips, Jesse?
discreetly drop this web page to him 😉
I love reading these!
This is the only time I’ve found something on the female rape fantasy. I obviously don’t want to literally be brutally raped, I just want my boyfriend to go from his normal sweet, loving self to a total masculine, lustful beast that just can’t take his hands off of me.
Is that too much to ask? lol
The rape fantasy reflects the desire, not to be raped, but to be irresistibly attractive, so attractive that the man can’t resist, and to be passive, to avoid any responsibly for the sex. Being raped in fantasy is a convenient way of getting past the big NO to sex that had been imprinted on a woman’s mind since early childhood.
How do I do I make myself so “desirable” after
4 years of marriage and 11 years of on n off dating?
I’m more freaky then my husband but I’m really trying to teach
Him. We’re young 26 and 27 with three kids but
Damit I want him to treat me like a little slut I often feel like he
Doesn’t b.c he’s knows he can…… So how do I
Fix this?
i really want my boyfriend to rape me but i dont know how to tell him
just tell him strate up. if the man has any kink in his body wat so ever hell come strate to ur place an do wateva the fuk he wants to to you. god i wish mine could handle it. she cant take the pain of any hole any time
This would be so hot, right up there with MMF fantasy for me.
The fact that my man is so horny for ME and that he wants to ravage me and have unadulterated hot raw animalistic sex with me.
Where are these guys??
I’ve had one experience with a dominant man and he was very well endowed. He so badly wanted anal from me and I would never in a million years have wanted to or desired to……but he was so forceful in a hot and sexy way, never taking his eyes off me, fully focused on both mine and his sexual fulfillment, no rush just very intense, very much took the lead and I was swept away completely by his passion and when he did have his way with me…….. I had completely surrendered to this man.
Damn!
Ps. Wonderful articles by the way Jes
Anon, great comment, wow !
had to post just so i could click ‘submit’.
clever–
Did the same here
i cant find a dominant guy…its embarressing:p 😳
Not looking in the right places sugar
CL Dallas
i came reading that!!!
“If you catch her off guard, she may not be in the mood, but if your passion is strong enough, it can put her into the mood. As the ravisher it’s your job to be relentless, to not give up, to punch through the wall until the woman submits and surrenders to your passions.”
Uh, I really don’t recommend doing the above. There are times when women just genuinely aren’t up for it, and forcing them to have sex (even with the best intentions) may have some truly disastrous results.
Better yet, just discuss with your partner what they specifically want (and don’t want) before doing anything. That’s the best way to successfully carry out a ravishment fantasy. Not all women have the same type of ravishment fantasies; some may prefer the more violent, spontaneous type of scenarios, others prefer something that’s a little more akin to a slightly forceful seduction and is a little more planned. Trust me when I say that there are so many variations in these fantasies. If you don’t want things to go awry, don’t assume what they want; ask instead. I really wish you had stressed this in your article, some men using this as a guide may end up unwittingly raping their girlfriends in thinking that they’re just being romantic.
STANDING OVATION. I used to do this with one of my exes and it was her favorite thing in the world. I’m gonna try this with a new woman on Friday!
Yeah girls likey it 😎
What do YOU think? 😛
Sorry. This is not always a possibility. My now wife asked a man to rape her in her single years. It was NOT a positive experience for her or, surprise, for him.
The reason it wasn’t a good experience for her was because she had a different perception of rape than he did. She was asking to be taken but he thought he was asked to beat her up until she can’t resist his forced sex.
I have been always trying to be in touch with my primitive animal instincts when it comes to sex. I can tell what she wants from the way she flirts. But even though it’s my nature to make her mine, to be dominant, sometimes i have to hold myself back (especially if i don’t know her much) because well let’s face it: Some women are irrational and they may wake up the next day feeling that they were raped…Truth is they were but not actually…”they were role-play raped”…well, i don’t wanna have to explain this to a Judge. And i am sure alot of Men think alike.