While Mothers want their daughters to avoid a “do her and dump her” bad boy Rake at all costs, a bad boy can actually be exactly what a girl needs sometimes.
Women are deeply oppressed by the role they are expected to play. Women are supposed to be the moralizers of society and expected to suppress their natural sexual urges and fantasies.
What the bad boy Rake offers a woman is what society does not allow her – an affair of pure pleasure, an exciting brush with danger. The Rake offers to touch and draw out that repressed sexual desire within women that cries out for liberation.
Elvis slept with hundreds of women in his lifetime… do you think any of them regretted it? Not likely.
The Rake, in his pursuit of pleasure, draws a woman into the kind of purely sensual moment in which past and future lose meaning. And sometimes that’s exactly what a woman needs, even if no long term relationship will come of it.
The bad boy Rake, a good one, is delightfully unrestrained, incredibly bold in the face of his own fears, and women admire him for his audacity, forgiving him for the fact that he is always on the prowl for the next woman. The Rake shows no hesitation in his actions by abandoning all restraint, by letting himself go.
And the Rake lives for challenges. Whereas most men give up on the first sign of resistance, the Rake never worries about a woman’s resistance to him. The Rake knows that more “prudish” the woman, the more she will be tempted by a man with a dangerous or naughty side.
Dean Martin the Rake
After all, it is often the most “virtuous” of women who fall mostly deeply head over heels for the bad boy. So resistance only further fans the fire of his determination.
In fact, the Rake’s greatest asset is his reputation as an incorrigible and notorious lover of all women. The Rake never apologizes for his love-her-and-leave-her ways, but instead he embraces it. He may be disloyal, dishonest, and sexually “amoral”, but that only adds to his appeal with the ladies. Paradoxically, it his very reputation that makes women compete for his attention. And often women love him for it in a twisted kind of way.
The bad boy is the man who breaks women out of their passivity and routines and into a world of adventure and fantasy. After all, women deep down want to have a chance to become sexually irrational and uncivilized, to have a chance to explore dangerous sexual pleasures and the taboo.
So you see, the bad boy “scoundrel” actually plays an important role to women.
12 thoughts on “Why Women Fall For ‘Do Her and Dump Her’ Bad Boys”
If you’re tall and good looking then the bad boy approach may work for you. If your not any of the two mentioned above then you’re gonna come off like a genuine A hole.
An A hole is quite different than a bad boy. Most of the examples here are celebrities of some type. A celebrity doesn’t need to be a bad boy. His “celebrity” statues is enough to get him laid.
The symbolic “bad boy” some envision on his Harley and will a blonde bombshell on the rear seat is just that – a metaphoric vision.
Any motorcycle bad boy I ever saw had a women that was just as manly if not more than the dude himself.
Not really what I had in mind.
And I really think NO MAN should “fix” or “try to fix” any broken-hearted girl, like someone posted before. There are shrinks for it. She got into a relationship with a bad boy? She KNOWS the pleasure she had with him – and she KNEW that she would be devastated at the end because she would never “keep him”. No one forced her to go with him. It screwed her mind? pay herself a shrink and fix it. As a man, just say “no” to any girl that wants you to fix her. That is covertly just an basic power shift technique. She wants to have power over you, as she ultimately will never be fixed as you keep using your time and energy to do it. I am with a girl, like many others, that had her heart broken (sob.. sob…) by a bad guy. I told her: you are ok to a relationship or you are broken, and I don’t buy broken goods. And I have no patience for weaknesses. in less than 24h she went to a shrink and changed her behavior completely. I value my time and energy more than anything in the world, and she knows it, so she respects it. Hope my comment was helpful. Yours.
I agree. Its better to think on “inner cave-girl” and the Rational Girl. The Inner Cave-girl wants badly the bad boy, as audacity, not courage rewards a lot. The rational part of the woman is afraid of the bad boy behaviour. I have allways been a “fair man” , not a bad nor a nice guy. Once I just behaved as a bad boy in a place for some months and I got the nicest girl there, married to a “nice guy”, to be completely wet-between-her-legs for me, prone to do whatever I wished, not even caring for her own pleasure. Her pleasure was to please me, completely submissive to me. Its fantastic and addicting. She couldnt feel the same for her husband, that cared for her a lot and at the end she, with tears in her eyes, thanked me for seducing her and made her do things she swear she would never do. I strongly advise anyone to try it first before being so judgemental about it. To be frank, guys, a man can’t allow himself to die without trying it.
Sounds like a controversy on this one
Wow this is just nice! I think your future daughter, or a niece of yours or your mother, or best friend’s kid would love this article and have some guy to do that to them. Wow!! Great advice! I personally think that guys like this, like Mystery also are still angry from getting rejected or perhaps ignored by some (bad/phony) girls in their youth or past. It’s time to heal those wounds and not try to get back at all beautiful females as a whole to try to hurt them so that they “appear” to be the stud. Women are not one-size-fits-all. If I did that to someone, I would feel so terrible inside after realizing how I really hurt someone. And this has happened.
Look. Women can’t be trusted. Period. A chick could break up with you at lunch, go home, shower, put on a sexy dress, a spritz of perfume and have a guy bedded by dinner time. With guys, it may be another 5 years before we sink the pink. Why? Because it’s the woman who decide who gets under the hood. So long as we men stay single and aloof, we retain our power in the relationship. Once you’re married, all power goes to the woman. All legislation is written for the woman’s benefit. Remember, women are experts at hiding the ‘psycho shit’ during the courtship phase, but once they have that insurance policy (marriage certificate and a kid) they ‘unleash the Kracken’… I’m not saying there aren’t exceptions out there, but like in bungee jumping, do you really have the stomach it takes to find out?
I don’t agree with bad guys are really the good guys. Sure a woman may require that fling with that type, but if its a fling then both individuals should be aware of that. Besides most guys who do her and dump her and assholes. All they think about is everything they don’t have, instead of being greatful for what is right in front of them. That’s why, when they’ve conquered that piece of ass, they’ll simply move onto the next. Plus, that kind of man is highly unlikely to be loyal in a steady relationship.
Come on… Let’s get real. Sure, it’s easy to get in bed with quiet, even wallflower types who have not discovered how to feel beautiful from a smart shopping trip to her favorite mall(with a knowing friend, female OR male). Tell the truth: women who feel beautiful, even in a curious ‘other way’ will frankly look great! 85% of Hollywood ‘stars’ frankly don’t look like much, out of school uniform, whatever their manager and stylist and dresser decide is ‘her look.’ You, our would be romeo, only believe your favorite ‘star’ is the ‘ideal girl’ because of successful marketing. Yes, you “bought the product” and now you are looking for your own version -a good ‘look a like’! But encouraging arrogant jerk offs to go off and shag+dump the next silly would-love-to-be-in-love bimbo is not fair. IN CONTRAST, sure, women want to be romanced! Don’t you want a woman who is madly in love with you, who stays in love with you, and who does not want to recycle you for some richer or more handsome dude, later on? Let’s Get Real… Mos tof the world is not looking just for a quick shag and throw here away tomorrow. The not so secret little secret is that while screwing around, testing the waters, most hetero men are looking for the right girl to stay with and have a family with, in the long run. That may depress sales of your prodcuts, old boy, but it s the not so ugly truth. So let’s get BACK TO REALITY and admit that there are enough screwed up women out there who have been ‘had’ by jerksand feel really messed up and scared inside by the experience. Add to that the child abuse victims, who do not walk around wearing a sign that says “I was abused” or “My mother was beaten to a pulp while I got to watch.” So the TEST QUESTION IS > All you readers out there. “Who are you looking for?” Sure, learn how to romance girls and then enjoy having them fall in love with you. Don’t mess up yet another girl that someone else later has to ‘fix’ emotionally, if it can be done at all. Who knows…maybe it will be you who decides to live with, and who knows ‘marry’ some nice gal who got totally screwed up and abused by the last couple of jerks who looked at her as an easy lay. Hookers are in the business of catering to such pigs for thousands of years. remember the girl you mess up is the girl someone else has to try to fix, repair, rescue. she is not some throw away like a once blank DVD that didn’t burn properly, that you pitch in the trash. Think about it. How many ‘messed up’ girls have you gone out with?
Well…… I think that women are drawn to adventure. Something exciting. As a musician (who’s married) I find it very challenging sometimes. Even though I don’t ask for it….. but then again maybe it’s the power of music.
Women are drawn to adventurous, outgoing, positive, dominant men… for better or for worse
i disagree. it’s true that most people would like to meet and maybe have an intimate ‘party’ with their favorite celebrity..
but, a woman fresh out of a relationship (on the rebound)
could do better than to fall under the spell of a soulless aluminum-siding salesman (rake). Better to meet someone with less ego.. (and perhaps more compassion)
how are you ?