Just because you screw-up a conversation with a girl, doesn’t make you a permanent screw up.
No, you just learn from your mistakes! And you bounce back.
Conversely, just because you single handedly bang half the women on the local bikini volleyball team, that does NOT make you a “master pick-up artist” either!
Just because you make-out with a girl in a nightclub doesn’t make you a “make-out God”.
And just because you lay a girl on Tuesday and another on Saturday, doesn’t mean “you’ve finally made it.”
Take credit for what you’ve done in the past, but do not over-identify with past success.
Otherwise, you’ll develop the “big PIMP image”.
And as soon as you get shot down by a girl, your big PIMP image will deflate like a flimsy balloon.
Your state will crash and you’ll roll into a ball of warm-putty, wondering what went wrong with your game.
You’ll be thinking, “I’ve had success before… so what gives?? Am I this big pimp I thought I was, or am I total chump who just sucks ass? What the hell?!”
Why Your Big Ego Doesn’t Help You
As a pickup trainer, I try to stay very HUMBLE.
I try to “man down” and leave my ego at the door.
I walk into new social situations thinking, “Yeah, I’m a dork. Yeah, I’m out of state. Yeah, I forget everything I’m ‘supposed’ to do. But you know what? I’m going to have FUN at least…”
And then I’ll just grab the first girl I see, sometimes stumbling through an awkward first conversation.
(P.S. Having a conversation with a random girl is the BEST way to “hit state” and get some momentum).
I’m not trying to prove myself to anyone. And I’m not trying to live up to any past glory.
That’s because this game will EAT YOU if you have a big ego about it.
Falling Into A Trap of Past Success
You see, when you over-identify with past success, you become too concerned about “winning” and “performing”, and “outdoing your past successes”.
Now you’re going in with expectations. “Man, I got a kiss last night… I need to get a kiss this night as well!”
Or, “A really cute girl was into me last weekend… this weekend I need to get an even CUTER girl!”
What happens with expectations is, you become overly approval-seeking.
You approach with a, “Hey ladies… please like me, please give me validation, please laugh at my jokes, and please give me positive attention so that I feel better about myself” frame!
You become a taker, a needy vampire, chasing after validation of your big PUA image.
Yes, that’s Nic Cage
You don’t push interactions forward because you become fatally afraid of not living up to past achievements.
You become timid and conservative and feel approach anxiety. And you stop taking risks to preserve your hot-shot image of yourself.
Change Your Focus…
So don’t try to impress others with your “skillz”.
Don’t go chasing after past success or validating your ego.
And don’t over-identify with your past successes.
That’s a sure-fire formula for a huge “state crash” later down the road when things don’t go your way.
Write down what you accomplish in your journal, and then forget about it.
And tonight, go in with no expectations. Enjoy socializing for FUN and meeting unexpected people. Focus on giving value, and being the positive guy who brings the party.
And success will rear it’s head in the least expected places…
That’s why I created the Nonverbal Sexual Mind Control program, so that you CAN be that guy that brings the party and positivity, WITHOUT the need for complex verbal acrobatics.
Other systems focus on “learning the correct thing to say next” which simply gives you approach anxiety and analysis paralysis. And that’s why other programs ultimately DON’T WORK.
But with NVSC, you don’t need to be a good “conversationalist” or even “good looking”, as the system exploits a glitch in the female psyche that responds powerfully to certain nonverbal leadership cues. So it’s a full “auto-pilot” system that requires almost NO conscious thought on your part for it to attract the hotties.
And remember, next time you go out… check your ego at the door and don’t over-identify with past failures… OR your past successes!