Why Frat Guys At Frat Parties Get Laid Like Crazy… And How To Copy Their Success

Frat guys get laid like crazy in frat parties – even if they have very little going for them. Here’s WHY they get laid, and how you can turn any party into your own Frat House.

Meeting women isn’t giving most guys happier feelings.

In many cases, no happiness whatsoever.

Feelings guys are getting are…

You’ve got to have all these goals. Get laid. Find a girlfriend. Do all this mental shit of memorizing and studying. In a way, it feels like a big pain in the ass, a burden. It weighs down on your mind. Because you’re always reaching for something.

You’ve got to self-improve yourself. You’ve got have the right things to say. Know when to do this move or that move. That’s not happiness, that’s a head-ache!

Then you get to the club or the bar. And you’ve got this yucky feeling. You don’t know anybody there. You see a hot girl, but you’ve got approach anxiety. It can feel stressful. You feel like you don’t have control over the situation. You don’t feel entitled to just go up to the girl you want.

Even day game, isn’t that much fun, or it’s not happiness producing. Most guys find it less stressful, but essentially you’re still facing approach anxiety. And it’s time consuming and stressful.

So most guys associate pickup, not with happiness, even though that’s what they’re looking for, but…

Approach anxiety.

Generalized anxiety.

Crushed ego when things don’t go their way.

Sleep deprivation from staying up late.

Disappointment from wanting to approach a girl, but not doing it and they’re kicking themselves.

Frustration when they actually approach girls but don’t get the responses they want.

Feeling isolated and lonely when they go to a club or bar and it seems like everyone has friends there, but they don’t.

Worry that they’re not good enough and needing to continually self-improve themselves endlessly.

That tiring feeling of always reaching and grasping and wanting, and not feeling like you’re succeeding or making enough progress.

Look, NONE of those are exactly happiness.

So all that sucks for happiness. And most guys can’t keep it up for more than a few weeks, before dropping out or giving up.

Sex and Girlfriends Don’t Bring Happiness Either…

But you know, we go through the pain because we believe that once we get laid, or once we get a girlfriend, it will all be worth it because THEN we’ll feel better feelings once we get the girl or the girls. We’ll be happier!

The big mind-fuck though is, a lot of these goals, even when you achieve them – goals like getting laid – don’t actually make us happier.

Casual sex itself, getting laid, doesn’t make you happier. You have a rush of excitement getting the girl into bed, you have the orgasm, and then you just want to kick the girl out. You think, “What this is it, that’s what I did ALL this work for???”

And after you have sex with four or five girls, it can start to feel really stupid and not worth the effort.

The problem is that getting a girlfriend doesn’t necessarily make you that much happier either, in the long run!

Girls tend to come with ALL sorts of problems… insecurity, drama, flakiness, bad habits, nagging… maybe she has medical problems or emotional issues. You’re often adopting a big ball of mess with a girlfriend that can drive you at times crazy. And you’re often trading maybe loneliness and lack of sex for a whole host of other issues and problems that can often lead to a painful breakup down the road.

Also, if there’s many things in your situation contributing to unhappiness in your life, like anxiety, insecurity, negative thoughts… then just having a girlfriend won’t change a lot of that. Having a girlfriend really isn’t a magic pill to solve your happiness if there’s deeper underlying problems there.

The Fraternity Model of Happiness

Okay, so if meeting women isn’t a source of happiness, getting laid isn’t that meaningful or brings happiness, and if even getting a girlfriend often brings it’s own huge set of problems, what then DOES make us happy with pickup?

Let’s take a look at what can go on in a fraternity at college.

Sure there’s negatives; drunkenness, drugs, putting up with shit you don’t like, fraternity brothers who are straight up assholes.

But there’s also many perks to joining a fraternity in college.

Like most guys say that joining a fraternity was the best thing they ever did in school. It’s a bond you make with a group of guys, and you’re often still best of friends even 30 years later.

So you’ve instantly got a core group of good buddies, comraderie, and male friends to hand out with.

But then you’ve got the girls.

The social circle you have and the social proof you’ve got gives you constant contacts with women, which allows you to get laid a lot.

When you’re in the right fraternity, many of the hottest girls on the campus will have sex with you, just because you’re in so-and-so Fraternity, because you’re considered “safe”.

And the Fraternity throws their own parties where NO other guys are allowed in, except members of the fraternity. They have to do that for legal reasons first of all, but this group of guys is able to quarantine off the girls and you’re having a party at your own house.

So it’s full of hot girls and you’re already massively social proofed just by being there and being around your buddies.

That’s why many frat guys who have absolutely ZERO GAME still hook up with huge numbers of hot girls.

And because of all that, the getting laid process is very CHILL and SMOOTH.

You’re just having fun with your best friends at a party at your own place, you’re feeling at home, you’ve got the girls quarantined there, and the girls are attracted to you, just for being YOU.

You’re not running ANY game, and you still get laid. You don’t have to do ANY self-improving yourself, you don’t have to strive for anything. Despite all your flaws and foibles, you’re still getting laid.

You’re not being all needy. You’re just having FUN. And the girls are attracted to that and you get laid.

And when you have sex with a girl, she’s not expecting you to marry her. She has sex with you, and leaves with a big smile on her face, just happy to have gotten fucked by the alpha frat guy, not expecting anything more from you.

And a lot of guys remember their time in the Fraternity as some of the happiest days in their lives.

And the process of meeting girls and getting laid is not a test of willpower and endless self-improvement, but a blast of having fun – happiness.

And pickup and meeting women, should be a lot more like meeting girls in your own Fraternity party.

The Electronic Fantasy Alternative Model

I know most guys never really have that experience of the Fraternity lifestyle.

But what we do is, we figure out ways to escape out reality and create our happiness in artificial electronic environments.

Like all the online gaming that takes place where you can meet up with friends online, and maybe the friends are all across the world.

In a videogame you can be somebody special, somebody important, somebody respected by other men. You can have a gang of friends like in a Fraternity. You can express yourself in games.

And you can fuck chicks electronically. Porn. You can have as many fantasy experiences as you like.

And the immersion cab be so all-encompassing with friends and girls – in a way, simulating the frat guy lifestyle – that you can literally spend all your free hours there.

And you do reach a level of happiness from it.

Problem is that, when you hit the age of 30. And realize that you don’t have a life. Maybe you want to have kids. Maybe you realize you’ve been wasting your time, even though it had a level contentment and happiness. But at the end of the day, it was like a pill or drug you kept popping.

Point is, the Frat Model of happiness is a very real one. And guys often will make up for a lack of one by constructing a fantasy environment for themselves that sort of meets the same needs.

The Frat Model

So how does one act like a Frat guy where the girls just want to have sex with him, not because he’s trying to be cool or self-improve himself, but just because he’s a cool guy.

So here are some of the traits of Frat guys who get laid a lot just for being themselves.

And these guys tend to be the most popular guys at their college in terms of girls that they can pull.

He’s smiling all the time. He has no reason to be unhappy, or gloomy, or depressed, or in a generally bad mood.

He walks around with an almost permanent smile on his face.

And wherever he goes, he’s enjoying himself. He smiles, he laughs, he brings joy to himself all the time. And tat makes everyone around him smile, laugh, and enjoy being around him too. A girls love him, and guys have this urge to kiss his ass.

He treats everyone the same. He’s not picky with the girls, or rating the girls. He doesn’t care about social hierarchy, or which guys are at the top. He treats the lowliest guy on the totem the same as he treats the alpha guys who get girls. He warmly shakes your hand, greets you, talks with you, makes you feel sincerely welcomed, before moving on to the next person. His interactions are quick, but very sincere, and he’s the most friendly person in the world to the guys and the girls.

He’s loud. You can hear him talking above the party. You can hear him talking above the noise. He’s loud and he uses neutral and breaking rapport tonality. He laughs very loud and it’s almost borderline obnoxious. But because you can hear him speaking from across a room, it makes you wonder what he’s talking about and you become envious to be in his group and talking to him, and it attracts the women.

He’s talkative. There’s no filter between his brain and his mouth. He talks about whatever HE wants to talk about, and that makes whatever he’s talking about cool because it’s coming from him. So he can talk about how he did his homework, and everyone would laugh and cheer him on, because HE’S making the material cool. It’s not about looking for cool material to make you seem cool. Whatever comes from his mouth BECOMES cool, because he talks loudly, he talks with passion, he makes YOU interested in what HE has to say because he’s leading.

He’s busy. He’s always got stuff going on that he enjoys. Swimming, eating, running, biking, hanging with friends. You will not see him playing video games or killing time watching television. He is a man of quick action and little downtime. And women find this incredibly attractive.

He’s a leader. He calls the shots. He knows where he wants to go and what he wants to do. He projects his intentions and everyone falls in line behind him. He leads the interactions. He sets the pace. He doesn’t react to what the girls are doing, he gets the girls to react to him. And secretly, girls want this kind of direction from someone who will make decisions for them.

He is the party. You know some people at a party stand around and ask, “Oh where is so and so?” They’re waiting around for the alpha guys to bring the party. But your frat guy who gets laid is never asking where anyone is, because nobody enriches his life more than his own presence does. He is the source of the party. He is independent and in control of his own happiness, he doesn’t rely on any girls or his friends to bring it. The party starts when he arrives.

And if the party is full of guys, he’ll start up something crazy. And if it’s full of girls, you better believe he’s going to talk to every one of them and get the party started. He’s always living in the moment and accepting it for whatever it is.

So he lives for himself, walking around with supreme happiness and confidence, gliding through social interactions with incredible, making himself the most popular and likable guy in the room.

And for all those reasons, he’s not running “game” and having “approach anxiety” and constantly “self-improving himself”, and yet he gets laid like a rock star.

And that’s sort of the ultimate Holy Grail in game. That meeting women is fun, relaxing, chilled out, a fun sociable activity where you’re doing warm approaches and it seems like everyone knows you or wants to meet you. Very chill and very smooth.

Taking The Frat Model To Clubs and Bars

Now you don’t have your own frat house to throw your own parties.

You don’t have frat brothers to hang out with and give you social proof, and help you throw your own parties.

You don’t have situations where the girls just show up at the door and you can be like the cool frat guy.

What you do have, are bars and clubs.

Bars and clubs in many ways, replicate many of the characteristics of a frat party.

There’s a lot of girls there, dressing up in sexy dresses to meet men.

And there’s a lot of guys there that you can very easily befriend and turn into buddies.

And it’s a big party atmosphere, and if you play it right, instead of being the lone guy on the hunt to get laid and you’ve got approach anxiety and stress, you can actually duplicate instead the frat house party atmosphere where women are naturally attracted to you, just for you being yourself without having to run “game” on the girls.

The First 90 Minutes – Have Fun

And you want to use the 90 minute rule. For 90 minutes, you just walk around introducing yourself to everyone.

For the first 90 minutes, it’s just about relaxing and having fun.

You want to open the girls and talk to the girls, but with NO effort to impress them or have the right things to say. You drop ALL game, for the first 90 minutes.

It’s purely being yourself, with nothing inside you head. Just unwinding and relaxing and having chit-chats with the girls.

So basically you try to meet everyone, even if the set lasts just two minutes to say hello to them. And that’s it.

Then, once the 90 minutes are up, you can go around again and reintroduce yourself to all the girls AGAIN.

But instead of it being COLD approaches, now you’re making WARM approaches. You’ve already MET the girl earlier, AND you’re in a better state now.

And girls LOVE it when they’re WARM approached. Even if you just met them an hour earlier. They’ll be very receptive toward you. And warm approaching is one of the most effective ways to meet women, because they feel like they already know you.

And that’s exactly how the popular frat guys who get laid a lot, operate. They’re not running gum, they’re just being super positive and super social. No pressure. That’s it.

Have No Outcome Dependence

And the key to making this style of smooth, chill, Frat guy game work, is to have NO outcome dependence whatsoever.

You’re saying hello to ALL the girls and introducing yourself to all the guys. You don’t care about social status at all. You’re not looking for anything, you’re just giving your positivity.

So you’ve got to get a handle on your motivations, why you are meeting women.

You can’t be looking for a girlfriend, that will make you outcome dependent.

You can’t be “I want everyone to like me”, that will make you outcome dependent.

You can’t be looking for a threesome, or for “Perfect 10”. You can’t be looking to get laid, or to fill up your loneliness, or looking for a specific type of girl.

All those goals will just make you needy to be liked, and you’re not going to be acting like the cool Frat guy who gets laid anymore.

So instead, think about the cool Frat guy’s motivations. We already talked about in the previous lesson.


He’s smiling all the time. He has no reason to be unhappy, or gloomy, or depressed, or in a generally bad mood. He walks around with an almost permanent smile on his face.

He treats everyone the same. He’s not picky with the girls, or rating the girls. He doesn’t care about social hierarchy, or which guys are at the top. He treats the lowliest guy on the totem the same as he treats the alpha guys who get girls.

He’s talkative. There’s no filter between his brain and his mouth. He talks about whatever HE wants to talk about, and that makes whatever he’s talking about cool because it’s coming from him.

So he lives for himself, walking around with supreme happiness and confidence, gliding through social interactions with incredible, making himself the most popular and likable guy in the room.

The cool frat guy who gets laid a lot isn’t looking for a girlfriend. He isn’t looking to get laid. He isn’t looking for the “Perfect 10”. His only motivation is to be a cool guy, to meet people, to have fun, to feel good feelings. It’s all about HIM. It’s not about the girls. The girls are just a side effect of feeling happy, and positive, and being social… and not being outcome dependent.

So THAT’S how you want to run game at a bar or club. Like the cool Frat guy.

And you eliminate the approach anxiety. You eliminate the stress. And it becomes about having FUN. Tons of fun, so that you actually WANT to go out and be social.

26 thoughts on “Why Frat Guys At Frat Parties Get Laid Like Crazy… And How To Copy Their Success”

  1. Since there seems to be a lack of sorority insight and female comments, I thought I’d give my opinion on this one quote that ultimately just grinds my gears:

    “You’re not running ANY game, and you still get laid. You don’t have to do ANY self-improving yourself, you don’t have to strive for anything. Despite all your flaws and foibles, you’re still getting laid.”

    To clarify, there is nothing wrong with wanting to get laid. I know plenty of girls who are fine with it, so enjoy your college years and have fun. What bothers me about the tone of this article though is the lack of foresight. Girls DO NOT want to be with someone who is stagnant, whether short or long term. What I find most attractive in someone, even a random fling, is someone with goals and a positive attitude.

    Please, never “get comfortable.” Guys, please keep finding ways to move forward and improve yourselves. Just ENJOY living. Being happy isn’t about just getting laid and instant gratification, it’s about living every day to the fullest and making the most of what you have been given!

    To be frank, I would rather sleep with an average looking guy who is positive, is polite, and talks to me about his current work plans and goals, rather a drunken maniac who just keeps chasing me around a bar because his frat bros keep egging him on. If I say no, then it’s a no. Don’t push the matter of make-outs or random flings.

    Maybe I’m a special type of girl, but if a guy just TALKS to me as a person and asks me what I like to do, then fling or not I’m likely to speak positively about you in the future. If you get vibes that I’m uncomfortable then kindly ask me why and if there is anything you can do. It might be you, but we’d appreciate the courtesy (again will speak positively of you to my girlfriends). Sometimes it isn’t! A few times I’ve just had a bad day and need someone to listen for 30 seconds.

    If a girl is rude, then it is them and not you. Just realize she’s probably not worth your time!!

    Hope this helps! =)

  2. Aweful article tbh. Aweful advise, and contradictory in many ways. Honestly really harmful advise to men who already have problems meeting girls, who you’ve now giving them an extremely difficult behavioral model to follow that you say will get them girls in bars and clubs. Add to this the classic complex of ‘in order to get girls you have to go in not trying to get girls.’ Just an article that reiterates what’s so destructive about PUA to men.

  3. interesting article.. I read it not with the best intentions, though, as it somehow showed up in an article or related article to a google search about “frat boys look so stupid”

    However, that’s a totally different issue. As a senior in college, who is obviously not in a frat, I’ve noticed a lot of these things lead to success as well. But it’s not just partygoers who would like this formula. Yes, I’m sure it’s great for girls, but confidence is one of the most important traits a person can have. It’s great for people skills but also extremely important for getting a job or interview.

    A bit off topic, and sorry if I’m hijacking, but confidence is key anywhere. I agree with your article but just wanted to share that high levels of confidence go rewarded everywhere. What I’ve learned through interviewing is it’s not what you have, it’s how you present it. Would you rather hire a gloomy and boring 3.8 gpa or a confident and happy 3.0?

  4. Wow, thinking back to my previous successes, I unknowingly used this formula almost every time! Now i can try to replicate it.. Solid article sir!

  5. Yep, I joined a frat and I usually just enjoyed myself and eventually the girls want to be part of the fun. I can’t say it’s the same everywhere, but what I noticed was that the guys that got laid the most were with girls they already knew. I could be wrong, but unless the girl makes it painfully obvious the biggest mistake I think guys make is going for the one night stand at the club.

  6. naughty_monkey

    For the past year i have been following a path of tedious self-improvement, until i stumbled on your trap-door, i see a different path now thanks to you! Until i read this i never thought Pick-up could be enjoyable, thanks Jesse 😉

  7. so how do you go up and meet everyone in the first 90 minutes? what about chicks who are talking to other guys

  8. You write like a 12 year old boy. Apparently you spent so much time screwing in college and not enough studying. If you aren’t going to improve internet writing, then don’t contribute.

    1. stfu katherine, just cause your one of the girls that got fucked by the whole sigma chi frat at penn state doesn’t mean you can come on here and insult someone who actually published a website to help others.

      Jesse. keep up the good work bro. I feel like a lot of guys could use your advice. Guys just build up too much anxiety for their own good. Thank you!

  9. Yep. I belonged to a fraternity in college and it was some of the best times i ever had. Every year we all chipped in for summer houses at the beach and ski houses at the slopes. We all got laid a lot, and it was FUN.

  10. Damn! The advice in this article is better than any PUA material I have EVER seen. I think if you take the entire PUA community and all of its contents, with its silly routines, techniques, inner games and mind-f*#$king bs they want you to do, it still won’t come close to the powerful message that lies within this article. This is gold, gentlemen. Outstanding!

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