I want to answer a question from Fernando and he asked me, “Jesse, is it possible to get every single girl that you talk to?”
Well, listen, I can’t really teach you how to pick up every single girl. That kind of thinking is treating women as not as human beings with different wants and desires and thoughts but as treating them as objects where you just push buttons and you get same response every single time, which is not really the case.
What you do learn from pickup however is how to have positive interactions with every single girl, and of those girls, there will be a subset of women that you have sexual chemistry with.
Now some women, you’re going to have more sexual chemistry than others. Some women you might have a flirty conversation. Some women you might have a first date. Some women you might sleep with them, and a smaller subset of women are going to be a really great match and you might even get married and have children with them.
But the idea of sleeping with every single girl that you talk to or batting 100 out of 100 average, as an analogy it’s kind of like if I were to teach you how to play soccer professionally or very well, thinking that every time you kick the soccer ball or the football, that you’re going to score, that you’re going to make a goal, which is not going to be the case.
Can You Score Every Time?
Instead by practicing soccer or football is that you learn to handle the ball competently and you learn to see when there are opportunities to pass the ball so that your teammate can score or you see an opportunity where you can score because a problem that guys have is that they just don’t see the opportunities right in front of their eyes. They don’t know when to make a move. They don’t know when to take action.
So pickup makes you more socially competent, have better social interactions, and have an increased amount of sexual chemistry with women. But you’re not going to score every single time no more than if you learn to play soccer better, you’re going to goal every single time your foot, you’re going to make a goal every single time your foot makes contact with that soccer ball.
Instead pickup, it’s going to make you your best self, and it’s going to make you help you meet women that are a good match for your best self and make you comfortable in your own skin and also it’s going to teach you normally when you get rejected or you don’t have an interaction go so well, you feel like your internal self is crumbling because you’re so dependent on that external validation from women, from getting approval from everybody.
So pickup makes it so that you don’t get that crushing blow of the feeling when things don’t go perfectly. Instead, it actually helps to build your confidence. It helps to build your positivity when things don’t go perfectly as planned because you’ve learned to rewire your brain in a way that you’re building momentum with every girl you’re talking to.
Part of the problem with this is kind of holding up guys who achieves success with women, who treats pickup as this kind of superhero gods that almost as if they had some kind of special moves that you don’t have or they say certain things that you don’t know about or they have some innate qualities that you don’t have, which is simply not the case.
Anybody who achieves at pickup is just assuming as you are. Maybe the only difference is that they take more action consistently, which is something that you can learn to do very easily yourself.