Now imagine this: you are on a first date with a beautiful woman, having amazing conversation together.
She’s giving you those flirtatious eyes.
Sexual tension is in the air because you are the man.
And then the bill comes.
So, what do you do?
You’re not sure whether to pay or not.
You could offer to pay. Be traditional.
Or should you do the “modern thing” and say split the check.
But maybe at the risk of the girl thinking, “Damn! This guy is cheap!”
Well, have no fear, gentlemen, because today, I’m giving you the definitive answer.
I am giving you the four reasons why you should pay for the date.
And pay in a way where it feels natural, cool, and the right thing to do.
Pay in a way that impresses the girl and makes her like you more.
When you shouldn’t pay on a first date
Now right off the bat., you should avoid expensive dinners, or anything too complicated for the first date.
When you spend a lot of money on women right away to impress her, you’re putting a lot of pressure on her.
You’re putting her into a situation where she feels like she owes you something, which can make her feel uncomfortable, and on some level, feel manipulated.
Or she may categorize you as a “provider” and slow things down.
So, if you have this idea of expensive first date out to dinner, then “No!” You should not be paying for it.
In fact, you should not be taking her on that expensive first date in the first place.
Good first dates
Your first date should be simple, casual, and inexpensive.
Like take her to a coffee shop.
Or grab a drink at a bar or visit the zoo together.
Or take her on a walk in the park.
Ideally, somewhere close to your place to create favorable logistics for hooking up.
Reason to pay #1: You don’t look cheap
So, here’s reason number one that you should pay.
With women, you’re just going to look damn cheap if you won’t even pay for her $4 cup of coffee.
If you insist that she pays for the $4 herself, it just makes you look like a tight ass.
Paying for that $4 isn’t going to make you look like a supplicative chump.
It’s not going to make you look like a provider.
It just sends the message that you’re a friendly and cool guy, and that you have your life together enough that spending $4 or $10 on a date is not a big deal.
Reason to pay #2: Simplicity
The second reason to pay for the first date is that it just simplifies things.
Now, it’s not something you even have to think about.
It’s just a given.
You’re avoiding that awkward moment where you need to work out who is paying for what.
This allows the date the flow without unnecessary speed bumps.
Simplify. Simplify. Simplify.
Reason to pay #3: You look like a gentleman
Reason number three to pay for the first date is that it makes you look like a gentleman in a good way.
Women do want you to be a gentleman when it comes to certain things like opening the door for her, letting her enter the elevator first, Pulling out her chair for her.
Girls like that because it shows a good education, social awareness, and social savvy.
Likewise paying for $10 is not being a needy pushover. It’s simply being a gentleman just like when you hold open her door.
Reason to pay #4: You’d do it anyway
Reason number four you should pay for the first date is because you should be taking the girl someplace that you would enjoy doing anyway even if you were there by yourself.
I’ll take a girl to a coffee shop because I like to spend time in coffee shops anyway. I like the atmosphere, and I like the ambience.
I might take a girl to the zoo because I like zoos. I find them relaxing and a good place to unwind.
I like parks. I’ll take a girl to a park on a first date because it’s something I would do anyway.
I might even bring the girl to a comic book shop just for some fun.
I’m basically bringing the girl into my world.
I’m showing the girl a sliver of my world, something that I already enjoy doing, whether the girl is there or not.
So, I don’t mind paying for. I’ll pay the $5 or $10 for her to experience that.
And if she really enjoys watching NASCAR, and I don’t, we could go to a NASCAR event. We might split paying.
But that’s something we would do on a future date, well into a relationship, not on a first date.
When to pay for an expensive first date
So again, remember, bring the girl on something that’s inexpensive, and casual, something where you can interact with the girl and get physical with her, and something that you enjoy doing anyway.
And then, that is perfectly acceptable to pay.
The only exception of going expensive and paying for it is if it’s something that you really enjoy doing anyway, you’re not doing it to impress her
For example, if you love eating at steak houses, and you eat at steakhouses a couple times a month anyway, it’s something that you love to do, then, YES, you can take her to a steakhouse.
And then yes, you can drop $50 on her because you are in your element.
Because you are showing her a window onto your world, and what you love to do for yourself, and you would’ve probably gone anyway, even if you weren’t on the date.
But otherwise, keep that first date simple and casual and inexpensive.