When a girl asks, ‘Are you hitting on me, are you a player?’ – Answering Her Back

In this video we’ll be answering exactly what to say when as girl asks you something like…

“Are you hitting on me?”

“Do you always say that?”

“Do you do this often, picking up chicks?”

“Are you a player?”

“Do you do this often, approaching girls in the street?”

And I received this comment from a view,

“Hey, Jesse, I get this a lot from girls I talk to…”

“They ask me, ‘Do you say that to a lot of girls?’

“Or, ‘I bet you’ve done this before, haven’t you?’”

“I tend to freeze up and just ignore the question, or I tell them it’s not true.”

“What’s the best answer for this?”

Get her chasing you…

Well, in this video, we’ll be answering WHY girls make these kinds of statements, so that you understand where girls are coming from.

And I’ll be giving you the BEST way to answer this to flip it around and get her chasing after YOU.

I’ll also tell you what NOT to say to girls because the way most guys answer this, they just come across as weak and creepy.

So be sure to watch all the way to the end to see how that all works.

And if this is your first time to the channel, please hit that subscribe button.

And that’s important because there’s a lot of mainstream nonsense out there marketed to sell you overpriced razors and face creams whereas this channel is about bringing you the truth.

I’ve been teaching men charisma enhancement back since 2002 and I have made this my passion…

So it’s something you want to pay attention to.

Now that all being said, let’s crack right into it.

 WHY girls ask you this

All right, so you’re talking to a girl, and she says something like…

“Are you a player?”

“Do you do this often?”

“Do you always say that?”

“Are you hitting on me?”

Alright, this means… you are doing it right.

You want your interactions to have a strong man-to-woman vibe or sexual tension.

You want her to feel that sexual tension coming off of you.

You want her to feel that cockiness and confidence.

And when you come across as relaxed, and confident, and with a smile…

She’s going to think, “Oh this guy is good at this. This guy is really good at this.”

So, these are tests you’ve got to just EXPECT to get.

And you can expect to get them every day if you’re approaching a lot of girls.

In fact, if you’re NOT getting tests like these from women…

It’s a sign of trouble.

It means your interactions are probably WAY too friendly, and “nice guy” and friendly “chit chat” where she doesn’t see you as a sexual prospect.

It’s ONLY when the girl is really liking you…

And wanting to move things forward with you…

And feeling attracted to you…

Will she saying something like, “I bet you say that to a lot of girls. I bet you get all the girls, don’t you?”

So it’s a GOOD sign if she asks if you’re a player.

That’s actually a green light.

What NOT to do

So let’s cover what NOT to say in this situation.

When a girl asks, “Are you a player” or “Do you do this a lot”

Your first instinct will be to get defensive and apologetic.

“Oh no, no, no, no, no…I’m a good, innocent boy…”

“I’m harmless…”

“You’re the first girl I’ve ever talked to.”

“I meant well.”


You want to apologize or run away because you feel you’ve “been caught.”

Here’s the thing.

The girl WANTS you to agree “YES! I have a John between my legs. You’re an attractive girl. I’m a guy…”

“Of course I’m talking to you!”

“Of course I talk to girls!”

You’re coming across as this sexually dominant and sexually outgoing guy…

So, she just wants to see if you are the REAL DEAL.

Or if you’ll just crumble immediately at the first sign of pushback, and it was all a phony act.

So when you act like this awesome cool guy that would obviously attract a lot of women…

And then you get scared or apologize when confronted about it…

There’s a sudden mismatch there.

She just wants you to OWN it.

She wants to see that you’ll OWN it, and embrace it, and not be phased by her.

She wants to see that you’re the real deal.

Women want pre-selected guys

And besides, women are attracted to pre-selected guys.

If you’re hanging out with two beautiful women by your side…

And the girls are laughing with you…

Touching you…

Other girls will be attracted to you.

They’re going to think, “My, my, my. He’s got two beautiful women with him.”

“Who IS this guy??”

Women want to have sex with guys that can have sex with many girls.

So when she asks, “Are you a player?”

And when you don’t hide the fact that you’re popular with women that can get her horny for you.

So the first rule of how to answer this kind of challenge from a girl is…

Don’t run away from it.

Don’t deny it.

Don’t try to hide from it.

Don’t apologize.

Instead own it.

Embrace it!

The Funny answer

So the first answer you can give the girl when she calls you out for gaming her or hitting on her is…

Simply AGREE with her and amplify it.

She asks for you instance, “Do you do this often, approaching girls in the street?”

You can say back to her with a playful smile on your face….

“Well, you see…I usually just smack them on the head with a club…”

“And drag them into my cave.”

“But you’re different.”

So here, you’re not being evasive.

You’re not denying it.

You’re not apologizing.

You’re in fact suggesting that…“Yeah, I go, do this often, approaching girls in the street.”

But you’re being funny with it.

And to a girl, that’s like…

“Okay, THIS guy is the REAL DEAL. He’s cocky. He’s confident, but for REAL he’s cocky and confident. It’s not an act.”

Be Honest

You can also give a more honest answer.

She challenges you, “Do you do this often, picking up chicks?”

You can tell her in reply.

“Hey, I’m a man! You’re an attractive woman…”

“It’s the most natural thing in the world to come up and SAY HELLO.”

“And it’s my job as a man for trying.”

“Anyway, life is too short to not go for what you want. So when you see something you want, you just have to go for it.”

And then get her to affirm that with you.

Tell her, “Don’t you think so?”

And she’ll say “Yep!”

Girls love that answer.

Flip the script on her

And finally, you can even flip the script on her in a funny and playful way, that makes it seem like SHE is hitting on YOU.

You tell her, “And what about you? Do you just approach guys?”

“Do I need to be scared of you?”

And she’ll say, “No, no, no!”

“Because you’ve been looking at me like a fat kid looks at a cheeseburger.”

“Have you ever talked to a guy? :)”

And she’ll say, “Yes, of course! I’ve talked to a guy!”

BUT see, now you’ve put HER on the defensive and qualifying herself to YOU.

A Full example

So let’s run through a complete example.

She says to you, “Are you hitting on me? Do you say that to all the girls?  You sly fox, you.”

And you say to her…

“Well, usually I would just hit you over the head with my club, like a caveman and drag you by the hair back to my cave.”

“But in your case, I decided to go the more civilized route because I like you.”

“Besides, I like your brown eyes like a wildcat, maybe a little dangerous.”

“And being an attractive woman, and I’m a man…”

“It’s my job to at least try.”

“You have to go for what you want in life.”

“So when you see something you want, you just have to go for it.”

“Life is too short to do otherwise. Don’t you think?”

“And what about you? You seem like trouble to me.”

“Do I need to be scared of you? You’re not like a T-1000 under that skin, are you?”

“Is this your way of hitting on me?”


So there you go!

That’s precisely how you answer a girl when she calls you out for gaming her or hitting on her.

And do it in a way that makes her even MORE attracted to you and into you than before.

So it’s a little challenge you can look forward to because it will only further pull the girl into your orbit when you answer it correctly.

Watch this next…

And by the way, if you like this kind of routines that you can learn and have at your fingertips and you want to have answers for anything a girl can throw at you…

Then check out my free guide “How to talk her panties off”

My free guide is chock-full of tips on what to say and how to respond to girls…

So every girl you ever talk to likes you and gets attracted to you.

Just visit TalkHer.com or click on the link in the description below…

And you’ll get what to say to covertly turn her on and get her feeling randy for you without her even realizing what you’re doing…

And how to keep the conversation going, so that you never run out of things to say…

And avoid those awkward pauses…

And avoid having pretty girls politely excuse themselves…

And avoid of course that dreaded “friend zone” where the girl sees your conversation as just friendly chit-chat…

But in reality it never leads anywhere.

So yeah, check out that guide.

There’s some tips in there that will really surprise you in a good way.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *